Disclaimer: I own only the plot and A.J.A.L.B. (You'll understand later.) I also do not own the script for the Harry Potter movies that have been used in the REAL movies and are going to be used in this fiction.

Summary: Harry Potter and his friends star in a wizard film about . . . him. The film is supposed to cover his whole life according to school years and other major events, skipping out on some of the minor ideas and staring him and all the Hogwarts students. Only one problem. Voldemort killed Cho Chang during the fall of his reign.

Rating: PG – PG13 to be safe.

A/N ~ Those of you that have read OoTP, This chapter has an excerpt from one of the potions classes.

Filming Fantasies

Harry Potter looked up from his watch, 'ten minutes left' repeating itself in his mind. He twisted his head from side to side, viewing the drafty dungeon from his emerald green eyes that peered out from beneath his eyebrows, wrinkled in confusion. (A/N ~ his eyebrows, not his eyes.)

"Potter," the voice drawled, the icy sound hanging on the air.

Harry looked up at the black robed figure that stood before him, greasy strands of black hair falling over his shoulders. "Yes professor?" he squeaked.

"Thank you," Snape smirked, "for joining us in the land of the living."

Snape turned his back to Harry and as Harry mimed strangling the teacher, shouted to the Gryffindor and laughing Slytherin sixth years. "A light silver vapor should now be rising from your potion."

Harry, who was sweating profusely, looked desperately around the dungeon. His own cauldron was issuing copious amounts of dark gray steam; Ron's was spitting green sparks. Seamus was feverishly prodding the flames at the base of his cauldron with the tip of his wand, as they seemed to be going out.

The surface of Hermione's potion, however, was a shimmering mist of silver vapor, and as Snape swept by, he looked down his crooked nose at it without comment, which meant he could find nothing to criticize.

At Harry's cauldron, however, Snape stopped and looked down on it with a horrible smirk on his face.

"Potter, what is this supposed to be?"

The Slytherins at the front of the class all looked up eagerly; they loved hearing Snape taunt Harry.

"The Draught of Peace." Harry said tensely.

"Tell me Potter," Snape said softly, "Can you read?"

Draco Malfoy laughed.

"Yes I can," said Harry, his fingers clenched tightly around his wand.

"Read the third line of instructions for me Potter."

Harry squinted at the blackboard; it was not easy to make out the instructions through the haze of multi-colored steam now filling the dungeon.

"Add powdered moonstone, stir three times counter-clockwise, allow to simmer for seven minutes then add two drops of syrup of hellebore."

His heart sank. He had not added three drops of hellebore but had proceeded right to the fourth line after allowing his potion to simmer for seven minutes.

"Did you do everything on the third line, Potter?"

"No," said Harry very quietly.

"I beg your pardon?"

"No," said Harry more loudly. "I forgot to add three drops off hellebore."

"I know you did Potter, which means this mess is utterly worthless. Evanesce."

The contents of Harry's cauldron vanished; he was left standing foolishly beside an empty cauldron.

"For those of you who have managed to read the instructions, please fill one flagon with a sample from your cauldron, label it clearly with your name and bring it up to me desk for testing." Snapped Snape. "Potter, you and your friends have been requested at the headmaster's office. Get out of here."

While everyone around him filled their flagons, Harry gathered up his things, seething. His potion had been no worse than Ron's; which was now giving off the foul odor of rotten eggs; or Neville's; which had just reached the consistency of just mixed cement and which Neville was now having to gouge out of his cauldron.

Harry chuckled, his mood temporarily lightened, as Goyle's flagon exploded, sending his robes up in flames.

"C'mon Harry." Flaming haired Ron Weasley approached, his big hands and feet blending in more so with his height.

Ron towered high over his companion and girlfriend, Hermione Granger. Hermione's bushy brown hair and dark eyes were unusually light and as though reading Harry's mind, Hermione smiled curtly and answered, "Lightening charm."

"Oh." Harry nodded slightly, his bangs bobbing on his forehead over his lightning shaped scar.

Together, they exited and once in the clear Entry Hall, climbed the stairs to a statue of a large bird.

"What's the password?" Hermione turned to face Ron.

"How should I know? I thought Harry knew."

The pair turned accusingly to Harry. "I – I don't know!"

Hermione laughed. "Great. We need to see Dumbledore and for all the crazy ideas for passwords he's ever had, it could be Voldemort's Knickers!"

The bird began to spiral upwards and the three laughing teens stepped up to the steps, and made their way slowly up to their headmaster's office.