Confessions of a Teenage Boy

Chapter One: Use Your Love

"O-Oh fuck…!"

Incessant pounding was all I could feel. It was almost as if I had gone completely numb for that somewhat pleasant five minutes.

"I-I'm close…I'm gonna…! O-Oh!"

And with that, another customer came inside.

"Goddamnit Lee! I said don't do it inside!" I shouted, trying to ignore the slightly gross feeling coming from inside me; the bushy-browed shinobi panted between words, eyes closed and face blushing. "I'm sorry Naruto, I don't know what came over me. You just…feel so good."

"Yeah, well fuck that," I got out of the bed and walked into the bathroom, leaving the door open. I turned on the shower and sighed, rubbing a hand through my hair. "The condition of you not wearing a condom was that you wouldn't come inside. And look what you did?"

Rock Lee sighed and got off the bed, walking up to me, "I said I was sorry, jeez. Where's the sense of youthfulness? I mean, it's freeing, isn't it?"

"Totally." I mused, stepping into the shower. The cold water washed over me, getting the sex to go down in the drain with the water. "You know where the exit is, Lee."

"Naruto, I was actually thinking I could stay this time, you know? Maybe it'd be a first for both of us? I had fun." Rock Lee pondered, awaiting my response. I froze in the shower and gritted my teeth, but it was all hidden behind the curtain.

"Lee, my policy is strictly what it is. Besides, what if someone saw you leaving my house in the morning? What would they say?" I asked, my anger rising a bit.

"I-I didn't know it was that much of a secret that you're Ga—"

"—Don't say it." I interrupted. "Just leave. Please." I practically begged. Without seeing him, I could tell Lee had gathered his stuff, gotten dressed, and walked out the front door of my apartment; I finally exhaled as he was gone.

Oh, I bet you're wondering what exactly that whole scene was! Well, let's start from the beginning…

My name is Naruto Uzumaki.

And these are my confessions as a teenage boy.

Of course, I'm barely a teen anymore; being seventeen was an awkward age, I think. Many years before these events, I was different. I was. But it was the events that happened that led up to me being this way. What am may you ask?

Manwhore? Too cliche.

Prostitute? Escort? Too fancy.

I would call myself…a helper! I help all the confused men of Konoha and other places to figure out exactly what they want out of life, love, and sex. Mostly sex. It all started when I was 15…

"You know, we don't have to do this if you don't want to…"

"No, let's do it. I want to do this."

The air was tense between us. I was in my boxers, as was he. At the same time, we pulled them down and exposed ourselves to each other. Our eyes couldn't keep off each other. He grabbed me. Gently at first but then as he moved it was almost rough but pleasurable. I tilted my head back and found myself biting my lip to stifle moans. I had never been touched like this before. At least by another person.

"A-Ah…go slower!"

He stopped and stood there, his hands on his hips. "Well, what about me?"

I froze. I had forgotten to return the favor. It was definitely a different way to hang around him. I found myself…attracted to him?

My heart was racing as I returned the favor, finding pleasure in pleasing him. At that time, it was only him. As minutes passed, he pushed me down to my knees and shoved my face near his crotch. "You should try sucking next. I hear it's great. Besides, you being a male it might be easier to tell what I want."

I was hesitant, but dove right in. I had given my first blow job. At 15. It was an unthinkable thing to even have any type of sexual activity unless it was masturbation at that age, but I was doing it. With someone I thought I had trusted.

But as time passed, and more meeting came and went, I fell in love. I fell in love with someone I thought I could trust. But obviously is wasn't that way; it was a summer fling, a way to escape and try new things. From the social norm. I was jaded. I became cold.

Ever since then, I found myself having more and more sexual relations with the guys of Konoha, Suna, and Kiri. Wherever I traveled, I found myself with another guy. In another bed.

In another hotel room, bedroom, bathroom, kitchen.

In another world.

It felt good to be wanted. For once.

"Naruto!"

A knock at my door awoke me from my slightly hungover state of mind. My hair was matted a bit from being wet all night and I could barely open my eyes; what time was it? I looked outside the window (barely) and saw that the sun was almost at its highest point. Was it the afternoon!?

I heard the knocking again and quickly got out of bed, putting on sleep pants. I found myself sleeping nude a lot. It was freeing, and I enjoyed it. "I'm coming, calm down…" I shouted as another set of knocks, louder this time, echoed throughout my apartment.

The hardwood floor beneath my feet was freezing cold, definitely waking me up a little bit more. I opened the front door to be pushed aside. "Come on in. It's open house, actually."

"Cut the bullshit, Naruto," the pink-haired female stated as she went straight to the kitchen, "I'm making you tea. Sit down. We need to talk."

Ah, how I loved the days when Sakura Haruno needed to 'talk' to me. It was more of a lecture and I was the sleeping student in class. Sakura had indeed become fierce. Ever since I had returned from my training trip, she had seemed to have a different point of view on me; almost romantic but still sisterly. It was really weird. Unfortunately for her, if it was romantic, I wasn't interested. I had discovered that many years ago.

I sat down on my couch and hunched over, rubbing my face to try and push away the headache; the Sake bottle was sprawled on the floor, obviously empty, and the cup I had used was tilted over. I was fucked up last night. That was how it usually ended:

Me, being a power bottom, I like taking control of situations. So I take control of the boys that come in that want to discover themselves, fuck them or in this situation, let them fuck me, and then dismiss them, take a shower, drink, and go to sleep.

It was a cycle that I thoroughly enjoyed.

"What do we need to talk about? That needs to be talked about right now, that is." I asked through the palms of my hands. I leaned back and let out a hearty sigh.

Sakura shook her head and came over with a cup of tea and sat it in front of me. "We need to talk about training."

"Okay, I train. So what?" I pushed, looking at the tea with disgust; I didn't want to ingest anything at the moment.

"…Naruto, this is the third time I've found you with a hangover in the past four weeks." Sakura explained and I was still not following.

Sakura could see I hadn't caught on, "You promised to train with Kakashi-sensei and I EACH time this has happened."

I let out a groan and sighed, "I'm sorry. Last night was rough…I was busy working on something and then afterwards I had some to drink, so what?"

"But I mean, to a point where you're sleeping until late in the day and have a terrible hangover? Is that even healthy?" Sakura asked, sounding genuinely concerned.

"You're the medical nin, so I'm sure you'll tell me if it's heal—"

"It's not healthy for you." Sakura interrupted. Of course. Sakura was always a know-it-all, but I didn't mind it; sometimes, she had good advice. Other times, I found her a bit annoying. Why couldn't people just leave me alone with my own vices?

"Look. We have a mission coming up tomorrow. It's a three week mission. You have to be ready for it. Are you going to do it or are you going to bail on us?" Sakura offered.

"Who is us," I looked at her, meeting her emerald eyes finally, "it's not just you, me, and Kakashi, is it?"

Sakura shook her head. "No. We have a big team."

That only meant one thing: this was at least an A-ranked mission. "Akatsuki…?"

Her silence sealed the deal with me and I stood up, stretching. Regardless of my secret life, I still had to make sure that my professional life was still intact. As well as my physical life. I was the demon container for the Nine Tailed Fox. And the organization known as Akatsuki wanted it. Taking it would mean killing me. They had already fucked with a friend of mine in Suna, Gaara, and we took out a few in order to save his life. But now it was getting worse.

More appearances, more containers dying; it was a serial killing.

"Okay, okay. Tomorrow. What time?" I asked, picking up some of the discarded ramen cups and sake bottles on the floor.

"Actually, we're having a meeting at the Barbecue Restaurant for lunch. All the team will be there. I came to get you. It starts in 30 minutes." Sakura stated, standing as well. I blinked a couple of times and nodded, "Okay. I'll be there. Thanks for the tea."

Sakura nodded, "No problem. And don't be an idiot anymore and abandon your team. We're here for you…I don't know what you aren't telling me, but…" the pinkette opened the door and waited before leaving, "…I know something is eating you alive Naruto. Just remember you can talk to me…"

The door shut behind her and I closed my eyes, growling a bit. Why did everyone think something was wrong with me? They hadn't seen me in three years, sure, but people change! Why was it so important to know what was going on in the life of Naruto Uzumaki? The number-one, knuckle-headed ninja of Konoha?

"Guess I should get cleaned up." I mused to myself.

After showering, getting dressed, and grabbing my wallet, I ran on over to the meeting place. As I approached, I could see who was on my team. "Oh fuck me." I whispered to myself as I recognized each face.

Neji Hyuga: the silent, but secretly kinky ninja. We had fucked more than twice, at least. The first time was more tame, but as the second visit came…well…

"Oh fuck yeah. I want you to choke me as I fuck you."

I blinked a couple of times, "Uhm…what?"

"You heard me, Uzumaki. Choke me."

As I was riding him, I slowly wrapped my hands around his neck and I could tell he was pissed. "Harder! I want you to choke me!"

I pressed harder and he moaned through muffled breaths, "O-Oh y-yeah…that's it…"

I shook the images out of my head and then scanned the next person. Of course, there was Rock Lee: a little more on the exuberant, lovey-dovey side of sex, he was definitely the clingy one. Sex meant love and that meant a relationship. I wasn't into that. Relationships were fucking stupid. Only a way for people to get hurt. Trust was a hard thing to earn, and I could tell that he didn't deserve that kind of trust from me.

The third male face was actually a pleasant one to see. Kiba Inuzuka was the one boy so far that I had been trying to get to have sex with me since day one. He was very attractive: he had the body, he had the personality, and he had the sex appeal of a wild dog. Which wasn't surprising. I smiled at him and pulled up the nearest chair to him, "Hey, Kiba."

The dog-nin smiled and looked to me, "Oh, hey there sleepy head. Finally we got you to come out of your crypt."

I laughed along with the rest of the table, secretly cursing to myself on the inside. "It's not a crypt yah asshole. It's my apartment. And I get out. When was the last time I went out…? Oh fuck it." I thought as I shrugged, "Hey, I'm lazy I guess. Not as lazy as that one over there."

I pointed to Shikamaru Nara: the extremely possessive and boring sex partner. Big in the nether regions, but so small on the interest level. Sex with him is like sex with a sloth: slow, slightly scary, and boring. Not furry and animalesque. What were you thinking sickos?

Shikamaru gave me a nod of acknowledgement but didn't even glance over at me.

"Must still be mad at me for last week…Oh well…" I thought, remembering how fast I had kicked him out after he climaxed. It was almost like a speed run.

The table laughed again at my joke about his laziness but there were a few awkward laughs; mostly from Lee and Neji who seemed to be super uncomfortable around me. It was usual. Public events were always awkward afterwards with me. Not for me. But for them. It was almost like they thought I'd tell their secrets. Of how they loved to piledrive me and make me their bitch. But hey, I wasn't one to kiss and tell. Or kiss at all.

That was one thing I had yet to do: have my first kiss.

I know, it's cheesy. But I refused to make any emotional contact with any of these people. They would just use it as an excuse to push me to come out or form a relationship or spend another night over just to leave in the morning. I wasn't having any of that.

"Well, I'm just glad you're here." Kiba responded, patting my back. I blushed a bit and smirked, "Thanks. So what's the mission specs?"

Sakura cleared her throat, "Well, now that we're all here, we can talk about it." She put up her fingers and enacted a jutsu. "Sound Barrier!" She whispered as the table was covered by an invisible sound barrier. No information would come out.

"Akatsuki have been sighted in Suna." Shikamaru spoke up, obviously the team leader as he always was.

"Again? Are they after Gaara again?" I asked, concerned.

"No, it wouldn't make sense for them to go back for him. They got the Bijuu already. I think it's a matter of recon. Gathering information; where Jinchuriki will be next and what not." Sakura explained, "Lady Tsunade believes if we go and do recon of our own, we can figure out where they are going to strike next."

"Don't you think they're gonna come for me…?" I suggested. The table went silent a bit, then Neji spoke up, "Well, that's the thing. They aren't going to come for you until last."

I raised an eyebrow, confused, "What? Why?"

"You're the Ninth Jinchuriki. Also the most guarded. They'd be dumb to come and attack you straight on. They're going for the lesser numbers first before coming for the finale." Shikamaru stated, crossing his arms.

I leaned back in my chair and sighed. "So what do we do?"

"We go en route to Suna. From there, we will travel to wherever the recon takes us. We're basically going in blind, but that's why we have the team we do. Neji and I are the trackers," Kiba said, "Shikamaru is team leader, Sakura and Ino are our healers, and Rock Lee and you are our fighters."

Ino Yamanaka, the blonde bombshell who had the hots for every attractive broody boy in the village, was staring me down as if I had smelled funny or something. "What?" I asked, calling her out.

"Have you been drinking? I smell alcohol." She asked bluntly. Kiba sniffed me next and nodded, "Yeah I definitely smell it on you."

"Fuck you and your sensitive nose." I thought as I rolled my eyes, "I drank last night. It's lingering. That's not important."

"Well it's important if you're unstable to go on this mission." Ino retorted. I gritted my teeth and calmly let out a breath, "No. I'm stable. Don't worry."

A few of the guys muttered under their breath something along the lines of "yeah right" and "stable my ass". It was only audible enough for me to hear it. I ignored it. That was part of the awkwardness. They all got into a stage of bitterness because I wouldn't continue seeing them. When in reality, there was nothing to be bitter about. It was a confused one night stand. What more to it than that?

There were a couple of minutes explanation about the mission and eating until finally Sakura decided to end the conversation.

"Anyway! If we're debriefed enough, we leave tomorrow in the morning. Pack resources for a couple of weeks. We can always restock in neighboring towns, but I want to make sure we're ready." Sakura broke the coldness of the table and released the jutsu. Everybody paid their portion and I got out my wallet to pay for the food I had eaten. But before I could put money out, a hand stopped me and put cash down instead.

"Don't worry about it. I'll take care of it." Kiba stated. I looked at him and found myself staring into his hazel, honey eyes. They were so entrancing. Akamaru, the big white beast, barked a bit and it broke me out of the gaze. "Oh…why are you paying for my food?"

"I felt bad. You were getting attacked pretty badly by Ino over there." He explained as people dispersed. It was just him and I standing there. And we began to walk away from the restaurant. "So, why were you drinking last night?"

I shrugged, "Because?"

"Good answer," he chuckled, "usually, people drink late at night either because they are partying or they are upset about something. So what's the deal?"

"Nothing. I just wanted to drink, okay?" I was getting slightly agitated; why couldn't he be just a pretty face?

Kiba could tell I was getting a bit on edge, "Hey, I'm not trying to piss you off. I'm just asking. As a friend. If you ever need to talk, I'm here, you know?"

I nodded but didn't verbally respond. I found his presence slightly…intimidating. As if my guard was being slowly broken down. But I quickly shook that away and sighed, "Well. I need to go home and pack. I'll see you tomorrow, Kiba."

With that, I walked off. Kiba stood there with Akamaru and sighed, "What's eating you Naruto…? You've changed…"

I stormed off to my apartment as the sun was starting to get dimmer and dimmer; The day was already almost over and I had slept through most of it. I opened the door to my home and went straight to my bedroom. "Fuck. Three or more weeks with all of them? It's going to be an orgy by the end of the first week. Just pray we don't go to a bathhouse." I chatted to myself, packing up all my things. As I went through my drawers to my clothing, I stopped to notice something underneath it all.

A picture frame. There I was….about fifteen, fourteen maybe. With him. I grabbed the frame and sighed, chucking it against the wall. It shattered and the wooden frame cracked. The picture inside was covered in shards of glass and I didn't even bother to pick it up. I was done with that part of my life. My heart pounded ferociously even thinking about it, but I pushed it back to the confines of my mind. "I'm done…"

I plopped down on my bed after finishing up my packing and looked up at the ceiling. Usually, when I looked up at the ceiling, I either didn't even realize it was a ceiling or I was being fucked casually by some random shinobi. I barely even emoted when I had sex; it was all emotionless to me. Just so they could use me for their own needs. Once they were fulfilled, I kicked them out, and looked at that ceiling. Blank and plain.

Finally, I fell asleep.

I had a big few weeks ahead of me. I wasn't even sure how it was going to go down. But whatever happened, would only be another secret to keep.

Confession #1:

I find myself having sexual relations with male shinobi for sexual discovery.

TBC

A/N: So I hope you enjoyed my first chapter of Confessions of a Teenage Boy! It's going to be very dark, if you couldn't tell, and also somewhat comedic. Review, share, etc! Let me know what you think!