"Connie…" Rita pulled at the clinical leads arm, her voice breaking as she tried to hide the tears that were rolling down her pale cheeks. "Out now, you need to take a breather!" Rita all but pulled Connie out of the door, it taking quite a bit of force to get the taller woman out of the smaller Resus.
"If I hadn't taken the Hippocratic oath, I would leave that good for nothing old way to rot in there for eternity…" Connie started to rant, stopping when Rita let out a tiny sob.
Connie pulled her arm out of Rita's hand, looking down the see tears cascading down the nurse managers exhausted face.
"Rita?" Connie questioned quietly, not wanting to draw attention to Rita whilst her vulnerabilities were on show.
She became quickly alarmed as she felt a small push from Rita, telling her to, quite impolitely, get out of her personal space and leave her alone.
Connie could only watch as Rita ran out of the ED.
Connie was unsure of what to do in response to Rita's actions, but followed her impulse to follow the young nurse, there was obviously something terrible worrying her.
She found Rita desperately gasping for breath on a bench by the quiet garden next to the car park.
Connie sat down next to her, telling Rita to cup her hands and calm down her breathing.
"Are you feeling better?" Connie asked, her heart breaking a little as Rita shook her head, hair falling in front of her once bright blue eyes.
"You're only asking me because I'm taking up your precious time, and you fear that I might make your shitty ED even worse! Well if that's all you care about then get lost!" Rita started to shout, Connie not used to people talking so directly to her.
The facts she received from colleagues and subordinates were usually sugar coated to save them a bollocking from the scary doctor.
Connie didn't move, only watching as Rita's eyes once again spilt over with salty tears.
For the first time she noticed how pale Rita really was, how dark the carefully concealed bags under her eyes really were and how emotionally unstable she felt.
"I care about your wellbeing..." Connie started, but once again the lack of emotion in her voice failed her attempt at comforting.
"Only because it affects your department…" Rita countered, Connie knowing it was true, but she wasn't going to lose an argument to a nurse.
"Ok, Rita this is ridiculous!" Connie raised her arms, Rita's tears of sadness had turned to tears of fear as she fought verbally with her boss.
"Yeah that's right, back away into your office. That's what you always do." Rita sobbed, feeling positively sick at the thought of losing her job after publically humiliating Connie and contradicting her every word.
"Ok, let's just both calm down. I'm not really the emotionless monster, with the heart of stone everyone thinks I am." Connie admitted, hearing Rita's breathing slow slightly, as she sniffled and tucked a piece of unruly hair behind her ear, waiting to hear how Connie continued.
Connie reached across the small gap between them, going to take Rita's hand. But Rita pulled away, not quite trusting Connie's intentions.
"Please, tell me what's bothering you Rita. I know what it's like to have a secret eat you up from the inside…" Connie continued, realising she had backed herself into a corner, where the only option was to reveal something very undesirable about herself.
She was about to speak when Rita's quivering lip opened and starting to form a sentence.
"Imagine Grace…" Rita started, taking a deep breath as Connie nodded her encouragement, knowing it was a big thing for Rita to tell her anything at all, let alone one of her deepest darkest secrets. "Imagine she was literally ripped from her arms, not from your home or her bed, but from your very arms. Then imagine someone killing her so slowly, and so painfully in front of you that a piece of you dies with her…"
Rita sobbed, letting Connie catch up with her thought track.
"You think it was hard for you in there today? what about me? That kind of woman is the embodiment of my nightmares." Rita wiped her eyes, getting up when she suddenly felt faint, making her way back inside.
Connie sat dumbfounded for a few seconds, not believing she could be so misunderstanding about everything.
She finally found the courage to go after Rita and tell her just how sorry she was for ignoring her feelings.
She returned to the department, only to find a large crowd of public and medics huddled in a circle.
Connie quickly pushed her way to the middle, upset to see Rita collapsed on the floor in front of her, Lofty desperately trying to shake Rita back into the world of consciousness.
"Right everyone get back to your jobs, Lofty, bring Rita into my office please." Connie ordered, following Lofty into her office and then rather rudely dismissing him, with no word of thanks.
"Rita..?" Connie sat on the floor next to the young nurse. Connie waiting patiently as Rita's eyes opened, confused and scared. "I am so sorry about your child. I miss Grace with every inch of my being, every second of the day, but I can only imagine how much pain you're in." Rita's lips trembled, a loud sob emerging from her lips, not rejecting Connie's comforting face caress, not expecting Connie to take her into her arms.
"You are so brave, and so amazing." Connie reassured Rita, who clung onto Connie with every drop of energy she had left in her body.
They sat there for a long time, both women realising that they had made a friend for life.
They had finally found someone that they could fully trust and connect with, and that was an amazing thing to have found after such devastation had coursed through their short lives.
A friendship strong enough to break down each other walls of steel, and to see each other's vulnerabilities not as a weakness but huge character building events.
They had found someone who understood them.