This idea came to me a while ago and so I've been working on it. This is AU so don't be angry about certain changes. This is my first attempt at AU please honest criticism. This story, in some aspects, hits close to home so please don't judge to harshly.
I really hope you enjoy reading!
Disclaimer: - should be enough.
She found herself not being able to sleep again tonight. She doesn't know what's keeping her up or what's bothering her. But at least she can use that time to write.
Early in the morning when everybody's asleep and the house is quiet, the streets are quiet, is when she can get most of her writing done.
But here she is, six o'clock in the morning, staring at the screen of her laptop with the cursor just blinking. Eight hours. Eight hours she has been staring at it watching as her fingers did nothing but dance across the keyboard not producing a single decent thought. Her twelfth cup of coffee sits on her desk in the corner completely forgotten about when the sun began to rise.
Her children and husband would be up soon. She should start on breakfast. But she can't. She doesn't know why but she can't bring herself to move. It's like she's lost all her energy. She's not physically tired but emotionally. On paper she has this brilliant life.
"Katherine Beckett! Would famous Mystery writer. Responsible for over thirteen books who've all hit The New York Times Bestseller list." (Never number one though)
Ever since she graduated from college writing has been what she wanted to do and she loves it. Whenever times are bad she's always turned to writing and it's never let her down. In her darkest to her most incandescent times where she would be engulfed in so many different emotions, writing has been her go-to savior. It makes her feel better every time.
But now after hours upon hours of sitting here staring writing seems to be letting her down. She doesn't feel anything anymore. It's as if she's gone numb inside.
Kate grabbed her coffee cup and strolled out of her office and into the kitchen. Cooking always relaxed her when she was stressed. And plus her children need to eat. Yeah, they're both eighteen now but they'll always be her babies. Even if times aren't so good right now.
She began to make pancakes and eggs just like Anna and Martin liked. She's only hoping that they'll take the time to eat the breakfast that she's preparing. Most of the time they skip breakfast and just go straight to school. This is their last year of high school before Anna goes to California and Martin goes to Pennsylvania. That will be the first time that they haven't been in school together. They're twins so they go everywhere together.
"No no no no Bill you have to get me five. Two won't work," her husband, Will, shouted coming down the stairs, briefcase in hand phone in the other. "With five million I can get Charter. With two we won't be able to do anything but the deficit."
"Coffee?" she mouthed to him. He accepted.
"Alright get Murphy and I'll be down there soon." he paused and started nodding his head. "Friday at the earliest." He paused again. "Yeah. I'll talk him into it when I get down there."
"Who was that?" Kate asked when he hung up the phone.
"Bill. He's worried about the new plans for Charlie."
"He's always worried. But I don't see why your plans always work out."
"Yeah. Listen I gotta fly down to Atlanta tomorrow cause that's where the meetings being held."
"Okay. Is there anything you need me to do?"
"Nope. Thanks for the coffee. I'll see you," he said leaving. She sighed and hugged herself.
"Thanks for the kiss. Love you too," she muttered when he left. Kate noticed that Will has been spending an awful lot amount of time in Atlanta now. She really hopes it's not what she's thinking because if it is she won't be able to keep herself together anymore.
Kate and Will haven't been doing so great. They've now entered a loveless marriage but neither of them will own up to it. She still tries to pretend everything is fine.
"Hey mom," Martin greeted walking into the kitchen.
"Good morning. Do you want some breakfast?"
He shook his head no. "I just really want some orange juice."
"You drank all of it last night," Anna announced coming down the stairs. "Mom have you seen my soccer shorts?"
"Laundry basket." She quickly ran back upstairs.
"What am I going to drink now?" Martin whined.
"You can have some milk with the pancakes I made you."
"I'm not hungry really. I ate enough last night. I guess I'll just get some on my way to school. Later."
"Byyye."
"Bye mom," Anna said coming back downstairs with her bags.
"Bye sweetie."
And that's her day every morning. Once everyone leaves she usually just goes to her office and writes until she goes to bed. Her husband doesn't come back until ten o'clock and her kids don't get home from school until six. And when they do they've already eaten and just want to go to bed.
But she can't complain she has money, fame, and a 'perfect' little family. So she should be happy right? She's got a great life, so she should be happy. She has an amazing career and two beautiful children and a successful businessman as a husband. Of course she should be happy. Is she happy? Why isn't she happy? Why isn't this life good enough anymore?
Kate makes herself another cup of coffee before going to back into her office. It's very cluttered in there. She has paper balls everywhere, pens with no caps, post-it's posted on almost every surface, papers on her cork board, coffee stains on her desk, trash can over piled, and a million half eaten sandwiches. She knows it's dirty but she works best in clutter.
At her lame attempt to write she finally gives up for the day and heads into the bathroom. She runs her bath water and adds her favorite cherry scented soap. Back in the kitchen she pulled out her favorite bottle of wine and poured herself a generous amount in her glass. Grabbing her favorite book off the shelf as she walked past, she made her way back into the bathroom. She tied her hair up before stripping down and tossing her clothes into her hamper.
Slowly she stepped into the hot water, letting it ease the tension in her muscles away. As the bubbles began to reach her chin she turned the water off and reached for her book. Her favorite book by her favorite author.
In the Hail of Bullets
by Richard Castle.
To her this book is more than just a book. It's her savior, her light at the end of the tunnel, her shoulder to cry on. This book and the man behind the words helped heal her during one of the darkest times of her life. This book made her find the strength within herself to get out of bed in the mornings. This book is what gave her, her inspiration to write. Those words are the only things that can truly express everything that goes on within us. They tear us down and build us back up. And that's what she's been trying to do, build herself back up. But since she can't do it there's no doubt that Richard Castle can.
Richard Castle's plane touched down at JFK at five am. He figured since it's so early in the morning that the press wouldn't bother showing up. Boy was he wrong.
He stepped out of the plane and was immediately hit with flashing cameras and a million questions. He just flew in from China he didn't need this right now. How did they even know he'd be here?
Castle looked behind him to find his publisher Gina putting on her sunglasses and smiling for the cameras. Why didn't this surprise him? Gina is always finding ways to make his life more miserable than what it already was. Its five o'clock in the morning why would he want his picture taken? Why would he want to answer questions? All he wants is to go home and pass out on the couch. He just finished his longest book tour ever so he doesn't want to be hounded by haughty reporters right now.
"I'm so gonna kill you for this," Castle muttered into Gina's ear.
"It was your girlfriend's idea. She wanted to come in and save the day."
"Wow," he snorted. This didn't surprise him either. Meredith was always looking for a way to be dramatic and this definitely topped her last stunt. He thought she was doing nice things for him but it turned out she was only doing these things so he would take her to the fancy parties. She wanted to meet the "important people" to help further her acting career. So far she's only been in commercials and she wants to broaden her acting stance.
When they walked out of the airport there was Meredith standing there to take home and "save the day."
With his car!
How the hell did she even get a key?
"Kitten," she whined. "I heard that reporters were here and I thought I'd drive you home instead of the limo. That way they won't follow." Sadly she was right and wistfully he was going to have to pay her back for doing this oh so sweet thing for him. Please believe she's doing this out of the kindness of her heart, otherwise he has a very bad girlfriend.
She talked his ear off the whole way back to his loft and he was too tired to even voice a "shut up." because that's the type of mood he's in. he doesn't want to do anything but sleep. Luckily traffic was light and they were able to get home in no more than twenty minutes. As soon as Castle hit the mattress he was out like a light. Not even Meredith's constant attempts to wake up him could stir him from his slumber.
Richard Castle has been writing for as long as he can remember. He has multiple books published and tons of fame. He likes to believe he's famous for his talent although everybody and their mother knows that's not the real reason. He's famous because he's a playboy bachelor, or at least that's what the tabloids like to depict him as. He hates that his fan base is mainly women, who buy the books, don't read them, and then come to book signings saying "I'm your biggest fan! I've read all your books!" But a part of him hopes that there are some people out there who appreciate what he's written and understands the message he's trying to send.
"Richard," a woman called poking him in the arm. "Richard. Richard!" she yelled getting more agitated. "Richard darling wake up!"
Castle woke up quickly to a redhead staring at him right in the face. He wasn't trying to deal with her either.
"Mother! What did I say about coming into my room? Especially when I'm sleeping," Castle whined.
"I'm sorry but you need to get up. You've been sleeping for over a day. I didn't want you do die of dehydration."
He looked at her puzzlingly. "What time is it?"
"Its seven thirty in the morning."
"I've been sleep for two hours," he said falling back onto his pillow.
"No no dear. It's Tuesday."
"You're lying."
"Nope check your phone."
Castle brought his phone from out of his pants pocket to check the date. "It's dead."
"Well if you've only been sleep for two hours how is your phone dead? You always charge it on the plane."
She had a point. Did he really sleep Monday away? For some reason he found that to be very cool. Awesome actually.
"I think i probably should get up."
"Yeah. Me too. And you should shower. You smell." When Castle groaned at her comment she added a delightful, "see you in the kitchen."
Reluctantly, Castle dragged himself out of bed and towards his bathroom to shower and brush his teeth. He could only imagine how bad his morning breath is.
While standing under the hot spray of the shower Castle began to evaluate his life. He has his mother who lives with him because her ex-husband stole all her money and he has his girlfriend who uses him for his fame. Otherwise he has a fantastic career and fans who love him for his looks. Man his life is awesome!…..no…not really.
He walked into the kitchen an hour later to find his mother sitting at the counter drinking a cup of coffee. He poured himself a cup and went to walk back into his office when Martha felt the need to begin a conversation.
"How're you feeling kiddo?"
"I'm fine."
"No you're not. I can see something's up with you and that girl. Goodness Richard how long are you willing to put up with her?"
"She's not that bad," he said trying more so to convince himself than his mother.
"Why are you punishing yourself? You certainly deserve better than that."
"Why are we talking about this? You stopped caring about who I dated since high school. Why the sudden interest?"
"Richard of course I care about who you are dating. I care about your happiness. And I can tell that girl does not make you happy."
"Don't you have an audition today? Maybe you should be worried about that."
"Oh yes I do! I have a strong feeling about this one darling. It's the one."
"Where have I heard that before?" he asked walking out of the kitchen.
"Ha-ha funny man. Avoiding the subject is easy but avoiding your life is impossible!"
"La la la can't hear you!"
Once in his office, he shut the door behind him, and sat down at his desk. He took a notepad out from the drawer in his desk and began to write down how it felt to sleep for over a day. He still couldn't believe it.
"I'm so pathetic," he whispered to himself. He's excited about oversleeping. What has his life turned out to be? Definitely not the way he wanted, not the way he intended. It's like he's hit a dull area or a grey area in his life. And he needs something to make it shine again. But nothing seems to be enough. What is it that he needs? The last time this happened he became a writer, but now? What will he do now?