I know I haven't updated in a while and it's explained in the chapter I am working on, but this one I wrote because, I'm scared. You'll understand soon. Thank you.

Disclaimer: I don't own GH

Information: All of this is what I experience when I get what I call, a dyslexic attack, it means that for a short, or long, time I end up seeing like I am dyslexic. (School was going to test me but because one student my teacher thought was dyslexic turned out to not be, she doubted herself! Now I'm struggling with stuff!)

Mai's POV

I woke up as normal, late and unpresentable, so after doing my daily routine of, throw off the covers try to brush teeth whilst getting dressed, after a shower, run down stairs, grab the toast that just popped, then run to SPR whilst putting on my jacket or jumper and eating breakfast. I burst in through the door of the SPR office to the call of, "Mai, tea! And you're late" Courtesy of my narcissistic boss, Kazuya Shibuya, also known as Naru. He was a handsome guy, my age with black hair and blue eyes, always wearing black dress suit. No one knew the reason why, well except maybe Lin.

Lin was co-worker much older than us, and Chinese with black hair that had a long fringe that hung over one of his eyes, I think he has brown or nearly black eyes, he avoided showing his eyes to everyone.

Except for Madoka, she's a pink haired bubbly women and Naru's mentor, she also happens to be Lin's girlfriend, and although Lin hates/hated the Japanese, he loves her with all his heart, you can tell by the way he looks at her when he thinks no one is looking.

Then there's me, Mai Taniyama, a short 17 year old, with long brown hair that reaches my mid-back, and caramel eyes. I still have a lot of growing to do even after Naru returned from England with his announcement. And whilst he was away SPR learnt a lot about ourselves, like Monk found that he needed more training on Mt. Kouya, even if he wasn't allowed to bring music up there. Ayako learnt that she was in love with the Monk and the two are currently dating. Masako learned to give up on Naru and is currently dating John. John learnt that he loved Masako and that he just needed to kiss her or else she wouldn't of understood him, this of course was after he quit priesthood. Yasu learnt that girls like foreign accents and is now known as Japans heartbreaker, he also became a male model, and sometimes I have to be his escort to some special events. Finally I learnt that, Yasu is an idiot who is lonely at times, I learnt that my parents deaths weren't an accident, they were murder, so after years of tests and mental asylums, where they kept drugging me and torturing me to remember, I finally did and was able to recount the full day in detail. I also found out- "Mai, stop day dreaming and file these" Said Naru, "What if I don't want to?" I asked smugly. He walked to the doorway and turned his head to look at me. "Who signs your paycheques?" He smiled as I grumbled and got to work. I was a good halfway through the pile when I tried reading the same sentence for the fifth time. But I couldn't read it, I didn't see the letters, I saw the gaps in between, and around the letters, I looked around the office, and after making sure it was empty I put on my black semi-thick rimmed glasses and tried again, nothing, still gaps. Then everyone came in, first it was Monk and Ayako wrestling to get through the door first, then John sweat dropping behind them and Masako ignoring the whole thing, and finally Yasu, he came dancing in and decided to moon walk part way, I would've laughed if I wasn't so scared and freaked out. I took my glasses off and curled up on my chair, I was ready to cry when Monk asked what was up. So tempted to reply 'The sky, the sun, the clouds, the North Pole' instead I replied "Nothing, I'm fine" I said smiling, although inside I was crying. That was when it got even worse, Naru came out demanding to know why I hadn't finished the filing, I just looked down as he said "Well? Mai, when an employer asks something, it is customary to reply, or are you too stupid to realise this?" He said smirking, by this time, everyone was silent and Madoka and Lin had come out of his office. "Mai!" Naru yelled, as I flinched. "Are you even paying attention?" I nodded my head. I didn't like yelling, it always reminded me of arguments and violence, it would scare me, and often I would break down. With what had happened previously and then Naru yelling, I was on the verge of breaking down. "MAI!" He nearly screamed. That was when I visibly jumped. Madoka stepped out of Lin's arms and walked across to me, she sat on the arm of my chair and put one of her arms across my shoulders. "Naru, can't you see how shaken up she is, calm down and let her get herself together." She reprimanded him whilst rubbing my shoulder. He sighed and walked across to one of the unoccupied seats. "Mai, what's up?" Asked Madoka in a whisper. "Nothing but can you read this to me?" I asked nervously showing her the file. "Why, can't you read it yourself?" Asked Naru raising a brow. "Um, well no." I tried to find an excuse but thought of none. Everyone looked at me with a raised brow. "Mai, why can't you read it?" I looked away from everyone and mumbled something. "Mai, why didn't you tell anyone?" I moved slightly away from her, "Because I was scared okay? Because no matter what I do, I'm always going to be like this, I have to live and hope no one asks me to read anything out loud, because I know, if I do, everyone will laugh. I'm forced to feel things I can't even explain, and why?! For no reason! For no god damn reason!" I yelled getting angrier and louder the more I talked. Lin and Naru must've figured it out and just gave a sympathetic look before walking back to their own lairs. I didn't want their sympathy. The others still didn't understand, so as Madoka was giving me a hug she asked if she could tell them, I told I would, after all it is I with the one who has it. She nodded in understanding before giving me a final hug and going to Lin's office. I took a deep breath before looking at the SPR irregulars-minus Madoka. "Um, well I, I, I, I have Dyslexia." I said whilst waiting for a reaction, John smiled encouragingly, Masako nodded, Ayako sat there confused as did Monk whilst Yasu only did that thing with his glasses where the sun glints off and you can't see his eyes. "What's dis,dis,dis-whatch-ma-call-it-ia." Asked Monk struggling to pronounce it. I giggled. "Dyslexia (Dis-Lex-Ear) is a common learning difficulty that mainly affects the way people read and spell words." I said (From NHS website). Monk and Ayako nodded. "I don't see how it would affect anyone though" Said Masako, it wasn't spiteful more, curious. "It means I struggle with phonological awareness **,verbal memory, rapid serial naming, verbal processing speed." I explained "Wow, so it changes for different people right?" Asked Yasu. "Yeah, for me it's like I see the gaps in and around the letters rather than the actual letters, it can be difficult at times or like reading like anyone would normally." I answered. "Is it rare?" Asked Ayako. "No 1 out of every 10 people in the UK have it, so it can't be much different in Japan." Ayako nodded. "So you have to deal with this daily?" Asked John. "Yeah, but if I change the overlay *** or change the colour of the paper it makes it easier to read." John nodded his head. "Now that that's over with, anyone wanna help me read the files?" They all smiled but most had to leave, the only one left was Yasu. "I'll help my dearest Mai" He said literally flinging himself at me. I laughed and pushed his face away. "Okay, but don't get too close" I said as we both laughed. That day was the best day ever, I finally told them, it felt like a weight had been lifted. I may have trouble but I know that my family will help me.

** Phonological awareness is thought to be a key skill in early reading and spelling development. It is the ability to identify how words are made up of smaller units of sound, known as phonemes. Changes in the sounds that make up words can lead to changes in their meaning.

*** An overlay, is a coloured clear piece of plastic that goes over a page to make the page that colour, they vary in colour and strength. (I prefer mine in black with white text, It makes it a lot easier on a small screen!)

-Mayonaka

Haven't updated because I had a dyslexic attack as I was writing and then freaked so yh, and haven't got back to it, but I hope this helps you understand why I have difficulty with stuff!