Title: Strategies of Life.
By Jaye Reid
Commenced: March 27th, 2002
Completed: April 7th, 2002
Rating: PG13
Category: Angst, Romance J/D
Spoilers: Tiny one from "Bad Moon Rising" and "17 People" but other than that, nothing specific.
Disclaimer: The West Wing is the property of AS and WB. I have no affiliation with either unfortunately, and as you will see with this fic, I think they're probably glad of that!
Summary: When Donna announces her future plans, she didn't factor Josh Lyman embarking on such a dramatic challenge to them.
Archiving: 'Boulevard of Misdirection'
http://users.mcmedia.com.au/~jayereid/jldmmain.htm
fanfiction.net and anywhere else if you ask.
Author's notes: I never know where these come from - and this is no exception! And for those reading the NC-17 version (if you have access to the State of The Union list - you'll find it there), this is my first real NC-17 story, so please be kind.
Once again, thank you to Bridget for beta reading this one.
~*~*~
The soldiers marching home from battle.
Well... not really.
Sometimes the senior staff *felt* like soldiers and it *was* the end of the day for them, despite the fact, that for most people, the working day had finished several hours prior. And really, they weren't so much as marching home as heading to one of their favorite bars in Georgetown. Somewhere they could drink, unwind and try to forget about work for as long as it took for someone to mention it.
Which usually wasn't very long.
It was always the same formation. Josh and Sam would lead the squadron, discussing which Republican needed to be crushed next or which senator needed to be swayed in his thinking. CJ and Donna - the honorary senior staffer - discussing the latest human rights issues that needed addressing, and what they would do - if given the chance to. Toby followed silently behind them, their guard. Musing over the way Josh could be deep in rant over a recalcitrant congressman, yet in a split second bounce 180 degrees and explain to Donna why the US, UN or whomever, hadn't already stepped into the fore and implemented the actions she had just outlined. To which she would express how inconceivably wrong it was, before Josh would merely shrug and go back to his previous rant with Sam.
They reached the Bar and like gentlemen, Josh and Sam held the door open for CJ and Donna to enter. They were rewarded with smiles for their manners, followed naturally by an ego-loaded remark from Josh. They held the door open for Toby which rewarding them with a gruff response about not looking like a woman and for them to get the hell inside.
This was their usual game play.
But on this night, after the battles of the day were over, after this march was taken and the journey to their destination ended - a new journey would be taken.
~*~*~
The table they commandeered wore the sticky glass rings from previous patrons - but it was something they ignored. This wasn't a place to worry as undoubtedly, given Josh's penchant for over exuberance, they would be added to in due course.
The other patrons were the usual mix of politicos and pundants, the odd student captured in the aura that encircled bars such as this.
Sam bought the first round, and soon they were melting into their seats, recharging their almost flat batteries.
"Josh, I'm going to be in late tomorrow morning," Donna announced after the second round of drinks had been placed on the table.
"Excuse me?" he asked, tilting his head, "shouldn't that have been ... 'please Josh, I need some time in the morning to do inane personal things instead of not bringing you coffee...' That's what you meant wasn't it?"
"Not in your wildest dreams!" she scoffed.
"Oh no. My *wildest* dreams include..." he began with a smirk.
"If you *dare* say the words *equipment* or *school uniform* Josh - so help me!" she laughed before being interrupted by CJ flailing her arms around in front of them.
CJ swallowed the mouthful of alcohol and winced before taking a breath. They were lucky she hadn't sprayed the drink across the table the moment Josh mentioned wildest dreams.
"Will you cut it out," complained CJ. "The last thing I need to deal with is a sexual harassment suit between the pair of you."
"Honestly CJ, I'd never have her... you know actually *charged*. I might make her sweat it out for a little while though," Josh joked.
"Children," came Toby's voice of authority.
"So?" Donna asked. "You have a meeting at nine a.m., and if you don't irritate Congresswoman Shillingworth in the first five minutes - it should go until at least eleven. And by then I will back dutifully at my desk - not bringing you coffee."
"I suppose," came Josh's sullen reply.
"Thank you o'master," Donna sassed with a smirk.
"Can I at least ask what matter of Donna Moss national importance requires your attention?" Josh questioned.
"Josh," Sam interrupted, then dropped his voice, "you know it may be of a... well, personal nature."
"Oh."
"Well, no its not like that Sam," Donna replied, "but thank you for pointing out to Josh the error of his ways."
"Hey - my ways don't error," he complained mischievously before taking a mouthful of his beer. "So what's the story?"
"My sister Lena had a baby girl this morning and I wanted to go and buy her something special. I wanted to wait until I knew whether she had a boy or a girl, that's why I haven't bought anything already," Donna beamed, finally a chance to share her news.
"A girl," said Sam, "come on, the rest of the details."
"Ah... 6lb. 10oz., at five am - or thereabouts. She's healthy, has fine blonde hair but short fingers. Lena says she'll have to learn something *other* than piano," laughed Donna.
"And her extremely outlandish name is?" asked Josh over his drink.
"It's our parents with the thing for names Josh. They're naming her Lauren Rose," she replied.
"That's very pretty," stated Toby.
"Toby? You just used the word pretty?" CJ commented.
"Yes I did," he replied taking a swig from his glass.
"I think it's a word we should weave into our next speech," Sam added brightly.
"I really think it isn't," replied Toby dryly.
"Hey Donna, isn't Magdalena younger than you?" Josh asked.
His question was met swiftly with a cuff to the back of his head from CJ.
"Ow! CJ, what'ja do that for?" he whined, as he rubbed the back of his head.
"Because you deserved it," she replied.
"What? Why?"
She glanced at Donna, hating the fact she had to verbalize this in front of her. "Because I don't think Donna would want to be reminded that her younger sibling is doing something before her," she stated.
"But CJ, you're fine about the fact your younger sister has three kids, you always have been?" added Toby.
"Yes, but I'm fine with that because I'm not going to have any," CJ replied.
"You don't know that CJ," said Sam. "Some guy could walk right in and sweep you..."
"No Sam. I mean it's a conscious decision. One I made many, many years ago. I'm not going to have children because I don't want to have children, not because the opportunity hasn't risen or because I don't currently have someone to have them with. I play aunt better than I could ever play Mommy."
"Oh, okay then." Sam replied with a nod.
"Well I'm going to have at least one child," stated Donna. "And there will be more than enough love and laughter and happiness in his or her life."
"And have you figured out who the luckless gomer will be?" Josh chuckled into his glass.
"Who says I need a partner? It's expensive, but I think a clinic would do just fine," she rebuked.
"What!" he spluttered.
"I once thought about donating to one of those... er, um... clinics," offered Sam.
Toby rolled his eyes.
Josh nearly choked on his drink.
"You what?"
Sam took a deep breath. "There are many couples or individuals out there who would appreciate more men making such donations so they can fulfill their desire to have a family."
"The spawn of Seaborn," Josh continued to laugh. "God, it sounds like a 'B' grade horror film!"
"Well I think it's very noble Sam," Donna nodded before glaring at Josh.
"What?" stammered Josh with an exasperated breath.
"I agree with Donna," added CJ.
"So," hypothesized Josh, "Donna could just walk into one of these places, collect her little *donation* and end up having Sam's offspring?"
"Point one," Donna started, " I could do a whole lot worse, and point two, it doesn't work like that. You can't just walk in there and *collect* a donation. I'd never know whom it was from. Basically you go there, hand them the money, they do all the security and health checks - they make sure you're not a nutter. I might add I should pass with flying colors, considering I am of perfect health and I have security clearance to work at the White House. Once they do all that, you figure out what characteristics you're looking for and then off you go," she replied.
Josh's brow creased. "Off you go? Donna..."
"Josh. If you want me to describe the procedure - blow by blow - then I will, but..."
"No! No... definitely no need. *Off you go* is a perfectly acceptable description," he replied, shifting uncomfortably.
"Good."
The rest of the staff sat quietly.
This was one battle they didn't want to get into.
"So how do you know all this, dare I ask? Researching already on government time? Surely I don't have to remind you that we have another three years in office and embarking on this little venture in the immediate future would make running my office a trifle difficult?" Josh lectured.
"Josh, I barely have enough time to look after myself while I work for you," she replied.
"So this is after the second term then?" he continued to question.
"I didn't say that either," she replied smartly.
"But..."
"Listen, I haven't made an exact decision on when, but I don't plan on being too old to enjoy my child - that's all I'm saying," she replied firmly.
"I could baby-sit from time to time for you," added CJ, deciding to weigh into the discussion. " I miss my nieces."
"My cousin Tessa," said Sam entering the discussion again, " she's a single mom and lives in Washington now. Anyway, when I can, I take her son Matthew for the day. It gives her a break. I mean she loves him, I think she would stop breathing if anything happened to him, but you know... I enjoy it too."
Toby leaned forward on the table. "My nephews... they were, and for the most part still are, absolute terrors... but my brother and his wife wouldn't be without them."
"I want that," said Donna wistfully. "To hold a baby in my arms and know that it is my own precious gift. Something that will always be part of me..."
"Yeah... and donor number 78972," Josh added before swallowing the remains of his drink. "I'm getting another, anyone else want one?"
"I'm fine thank you," Donna replied politely, determined not to let it show that his comments had hurt.
Even if Josh didn't notice, everyone else did.
"Beer," said Sam.
"I'll come with you," offered Toby as he nodded towards CJ.
"No, I'm find Tobus," she replied.
"I don't need the help," said Josh to Toby as he stood.
"Yes you do my friend," came the reply.
Josh shrugged and they headed for the bar.
"He didn't mean it like it sounded," said CJ to Donna as they watched them walk to the bar.
"Yes he did CJ," Donna replied, trying to smile, "but it's okay. Josh was just being... well Josh."
"Sometimes I wish Josh would be Sam," CJ snorted, before turning to Sam. "I meant that as a compliment by the way."
"I took it as one and I thank you," smiled Sam.
Donna sighed. "I guess he's just feeling a bit left out of the conversation. I mean, we all have some story about children. Josh doesn't have anything other than his own memories and some of them are less than pleasant," Donna offered.
"I know that," replied CJ, "but it doesn't mean he has to take that tone. Especially not with you."
"He's just worried I'll abandon him and he'll have to train another assistant," Donna shrugged.
"Why do you... how can you defend his actions the way you do?" Sam questioned. "He's been my friend for a hell of a long time, but I wouldn't let him get away with some of the stuff he tries to pull?"
"Because love is blind," replied CJ quietly before smiling at Donna.
Sam pondered for a moment and then nodded. "And if you let yourself really hear the words then..."
"Hey! I thought you asked *me*." Donna interrupted.
"He did, but we figured it out for ourselves," CJ replied, nudging Donna gently with her shoulder and chuckling.
"Honestly, you two don't know..." Donna started before Josh interrupted her.
"Okay Samuel, your beer," said Josh as he passed the drink to his friend as he and Toby rejoined them at the table. "And a large packet of crisps."
"Tomato salsa flavored?" questioned CJ.
"They didn't have any other?" added Sam with a slight frown.
"Ohh... who would want any other kind," grinned Donna as she grabbed the packet, ripped it open down the seam and placed it in the middle of the table for them to share. "These are the best," she added as she munched on one.
"Not with what we're drinking," CJ replied, glancing into her glass and then to Josh. "And speaking of drinking... Josh?"
"It's just coke," he replied, trying to sound casual.
Sam chuckled, "Two beers and he doesn't have to be told these days!"
"Hey, I just didn't feel like another beer," he replied.
"More like you didn't feel like having to ask Donna in the morning if you did or said anything you needed to apologize for and to explain exactly why you felt like crap," offered Toby.
"I will admit, there may have been some slight reflection on that which helped me reach my decision," he stated quietly.
They talked about work for a little longer and finished their drinks before deciding that they all really needed to go home. Sam was the first to leave, realizing he'd left a file on his desk that he needed first thing in the morning as he was heading to a meeting before going into the White House.
Toby noticed a taxi unoccupied outside the bar as he glanced out the window. As he and CJ lived in the same general direction they decided to share it, hurrying out before someone else had the same idea.
*
Josh shoved his hands in his pockets and scuffed his shoes on the sidewalk as he and Donna entered the late night air. His forehead wore the thinking creases she knew so well.
"What Josh?" she asked, knowing that he would only work himself up if he didn't start to verbalize his thoughts.
He opened and closed his mouth a few times before shrugging.
"So, you think it's gonna rain?" he asked, glancing up at the sky as they started to walk.
"I doubt it Josh. There's not a cloud in the sky," Donna chuckled.
"Well you never know, storms just like... blow up from no where sometimes," he shrugged.
"Josh, you've been quite since..."
"What were you guys talking about when Toby and I went to the bar?" he asked.
"Oh... nothing much," she replied; now wondering why he wanted to know. Afraid he'd missed out on some gossip?
"Toby told me I was an inconsiderate bastard and he had no idea why the hell you put up with me," Josh continued, his eyes downcast, watching his feet on the pavement.
"Actually, the conversations may have been similar," Donna sighed, at least now she knew why Toby had accompanied him to the bar. He made her miss her older brothers less sometimes. He had slotted in there and seemed to champion her cause whenever he felt it was needed.
"It's just... you'd really want to have a baby that way?" he asked, bouncing around in front of her.
Donna stopped. "If I had to... if it was my only option, then yes. I'm a modern, independent woman. And I want to be a mother."
"And you should be you know, Donna. You are just such an amazingly, incredible woman and you are so damn good at everything you do."
"Josh..."
"I was a jerk tonight Donna," he stated as he fell in beside her and they started walking again.
"Josh, don't worry about it. You were just being..."
"Yeah *me*. And more often than not that means jerk. I didn't need Toby to point it out, I already knew. But I couldn't stop myself. I was just so..."
"Pissed to think you'd have to learn to yell at someone else if I left the White House?" she smirked.
"No... jealous that one day you could have a baby that wasn't mine."
Their feet stopped.
"Josh?"
"Yeah, I know. Surprised me too when I figured it out," he shrugged.
"Josh what do you mean?" she stammered.
"I think I mean I want you to have *my* baby. Okay, so I'm not good looking like Sam, and there are some other genetic traits that any kid that is part me might inherit that you may not be too wild about... but hey, at least you've had practice at dealing with them. And just think..."
"Josh, this is all very sweet, and would save me a considerable amount of money that I could put towards the child's future, but have you really..."
"Oh I'd have rules Donna. And my rules would seriously need to be followed and not mocked." he replied.
"Oh yes?" she questioned crossing her arms in front of her. "You making rules this should be good. Let's see I suppose I would have to bring you coffee all the while I still worked for you. I guess you'd expect me to be subservient to you all the time for the privilege of having your child, I'm sure you'd expect bowing to be included and what... calling you Sir? I also guess you would want full naming rights in fear that I would give the child a name that wouldn't befit a part Lyman."
"Donna! Christ, take that all back! Please tell me you take all that back and you don't mean it? Do you really think that little of me to believe I would make you... God take it back now Donna!"
"Okay... okay," she repeated softly, seeing the hurt in his eyes. "I'm sorry... it's just, well it's just that you've spent most of the night being a total snarky bastard to me. I don't know what to expect at the moment because you're now acting like someone I don't see very often and I don't want to get lost in the euphoria of your latest revelation because I don't know how long it will be until you turn back to the other guy again."
"You know you should try and breathe whilst talking sometimes Donna. It helps," Josh replied, his dimples making a fleeting appearance - all was forgiven.
"Josh, please..."
"Look, I won't promise that guy is gone forever, because we both know me better than that, but he's gone for tonight. I promise, I left him getting drunk back at the Bar," he smiled. "Believe me?"
"Yes."
"Okay, then," he nodded and they started walking again.
"So, what are your rules Joshua?" she asked cautiously.
"Well, first I wouldn't be happy if you decided to move to the other side of the country. I mean absentee parenting is obviously rife through the Beltway. So many guys here end up watching their kid's lives through the photo they update on their desks rather than watching it first hand. I wouldn't want that. I would want to be able to spend time with our child, and it would make it all the worse if you were living in California or somewhere like that. Which I guess leads me to the point that I would want to be allowed to play Dad when it was okay with you. I don't think I'll ever have the opportunity any other time, and although I'd probably suck at it, I'd like to try. And if my Mom... well she's always wanted grandchildren, so if it was okay with you, well... you know, I'd like her to be able to visit and stuff. And as for names... well you did say it was your parents who liked non traditional names, not you... but I'd like to be able to offer suggestions towards your final decision."
"Josh, you're... you're *serious*?" she said slowly, letting all the words swirling in her head sink in.
"Yes, I don't think I've been *this* serious about anything since... well I'm not sure I can compare it to anything else," he replied.
"And... if we did this Josh, what makes you think that I wouldn't want you to be around us? How could you think I would consider moving to the other side of the country?" she said stopping.
"You know I can be a moody son-of-a-bitch. The thought of escaping, well I couldn't put up with it the way you do," he offered.
"If we did this, I would want you around," she replied seriously. "I mean I will probably go back to University if I can, study part-time."
"I'd want to be more than a baby-sitter, Donna. That's what *aunt* CJ is for," he nodded back down the street and chuckled. "If you... if we... well, I would want to be there."
"Josh... you um, realize that if we... err... *did* this, it would have to be the old-fashioned way?" she smirked, wondering if he'd still be interested.
"Can we practice?" Josh asked cheekily before wrapping his arms around Donna quickly and planting his lips firmly on hers. There was nothing tentative about the kiss, and as he attempted to deepen it, he was pleasantly surprised there was no sudden pain emanating from the back of his head *or* groin region.
They stood wrapped around each other on the sidewalk, the glow of a nearby streetlight illuminating them to anyone passing by. It wasn't until a car horn sounded as it passed, that they broke apart.
"Was that... um..."
"Josh, you kissed me."
"Ah, yeah... you, I believe you kissed me back so I really think that contemplating serious injury to me at this point would..."
"Josh, I... you... why did you kiss me?"
"I could ask why you kissed me back?" he grinned.
"Josh," she complained with a similar grin.
"Donna, you know I wouldn't mind it if you thought about us sharing a place if we did this. You know, it would make sense... it would save money on rent and I could be on hand whenever you needed me to..."
"Josh..."
"Look it would make sense Donna," he said bouncing on the balls of his feet. "You could go to a University here and we..."
"Josh?"
"Yes?"
"How did we get here?"
Josh looked around and realized they were standing outside his apartment building.
"I'm not too sure," he chuckled, continuing to bounce his nervous energy around her. "I guess my feet are used to taking my drunken body home and they just knew the way."
"But you're not drunk and they usually know the way to *my* apartment!" she laughed.
"Well perhaps they just know how to find you, because you're right here with me," he motioned.
"That I am Joshua."
"Donna, would you like to come in and..."
"Practice?"
"Um... well I wasn't going to say that because I don't want to risk losing those parts of my body that would be required for such an activity, but since *you* mentioned it, well... then... I was figuring it might be a good thing?"
"Josh, you've spent 14 to 16 hour days in the office all this week, not to mention a couple of beers in the past two hours, are you... are you *capable* of following through with this?" Donna queried.
"Honestly?"
"Of course."
"I don't know. Please believe me if I prove incapable... the intent is there Donna."
"It'll be okay," she smiled.
"You'll pay out on me forever though, won't you?" he replied cautiously.
"Of most definitely," she grinned.
"I'd better make sure I get this right then," he replied.
"Josh," she breathed as she reached out for his hand. "What are we doing?"
"Something we should have done a long time ago," he replied with a grin as he led her into the building.
~*~
"That was..."
"Yeah," Josh breathed.
"We just... and it was..."
"Exquisite."
"Exquisite?"
"760, remember?" he smiled.
"Of course," Donna nodded.
"I'm thinking we might be good at this," he stated, kissing her shoulder.
"You're able to think?" she chuckled.
"Well..."
"Josh?"
"Yes?"
"I can't breathe..."
Josh realized that the full weight of his body was on hers, and while he enjoyed the contact, it didn't leave Donna much chance for important things... like breathing.
"Geez Donna, why didn't you say something sooner?" he replied as he rolled onto his side, taking her with him.
"I had to regain my powers of speech," she grinned.
"So, do you think we might have... you know, just before, done something that is going to be... life changing... for both of us?" Josh asked, as he slid his arm under Donna's head.
"Oh I think all of this is fairly life changing," she replied.
"Donna... you know what I mean..."
"So instead of bathing in the afterglow... we should discuss the chances of whether or not you impregnated me?" she mused, trying to keep a straight face.
"Donna... do you have to sound so... clinical about it?"
Josh looked up and saw the smile dancing in her eyes.
"I'm sure you'd have the stats," he replied.
"Well I did do all that research on teen pregnancies for you Josh."
"Somehow I don't think you'll qualify as a teen!"
"Lucky for you," she laughed out loud, " because I think you'd be in a whole heap of trouble if I was!"
"You're my assistant Donna, who says I won't be anyway?"
"Well, if it were to become a thing, at least it might only be *one* thing, not two."
"Huh?"
"The *first* thing would be we were sleeping together, the *second* that you got me 'in the family way.' If we did it all tonight, it would only be one thing, not two."
"Well *there's* a positive spin on it for CJ," he deadpanned.
"I'll say," she sniggered
"We could always make it legal," Josh shrugged.
"Why would we want to do that?"
"Well... it sounded like a good idea in my head," he offered.
"Josh... only a few hours ago you were joking about, and I quote "who the luckless gomer" would be. And *since* then, you have volunteered to *be* said gomer and now you're talking about being the *permanent* gomer in my life?"
"You know, it's at this point I realize how much I regret coining the term *gomer* in relation to the guys you've dated previously."
"Josh I'm not even dating anyone *currently* so..."
"You're dating me..."
"No, I just had the most increditable mind blowing..."
"Don't say sex Donna. Please, this is more than that to me," he interrupted.
She smiled, leaned forward and kissed him. "Cliché number what? Yes, I understand it's more than that... but date? We haven't done that yet."
"What about tonight?" he asked as he lifted her up whilst struggling to get the comforter from underneath them.
She laughed out loud as she helped him pull the covers over their exhausted bodies.
"You, me, Sam, CJ and Toby - all rung out after a hell of a week at the White House, does *not* constitute a date."
"Does the fact I love you and I should have told you years ago count for anything?" he asked, tentatively.
A small satisfied smile escaped her lips. "Yes it does."
"Will you stay tonight, please?" he asked, cautiously.
She nestled into his arms, "I'd like that."
"I'd like that too," he replied closing his eyes.
"Josh?"
"Hmm?"
"Thank you for the crisps."
"The crisps?"
"Tomato-salsa flavored - at the Bar tonight, thank you."
"They're your favorite," he mumbled, the soporific effects of their activities beginning to take hold.
"I know... but more importantly, you knew."
"I just..." he tightened his arm around her; he wasn't sure what he wanted to say.
"Go to sleep Josh."
"Goodnight Donna," he replied, kissing the top of her head.
"Night."
They lay there, listening to each other breathing.
"Donna?"
"Yes Josh?"
" 'you think we made a baby tonight?"
"I don't know... maybe."
"Yeah," he sighed contentedly, "maybe...."
"Goodnight Joshua."
The end.
By Jaye Reid
Commenced: March 27th, 2002
Completed: April 7th, 2002
Rating: PG13
Category: Angst, Romance J/D
Spoilers: Tiny one from "Bad Moon Rising" and "17 People" but other than that, nothing specific.
Disclaimer: The West Wing is the property of AS and WB. I have no affiliation with either unfortunately, and as you will see with this fic, I think they're probably glad of that!
Summary: When Donna announces her future plans, she didn't factor Josh Lyman embarking on such a dramatic challenge to them.
Archiving: 'Boulevard of Misdirection'
http://users.mcmedia.com.au/~jayereid/jldmmain.htm
fanfiction.net and anywhere else if you ask.
Author's notes: I never know where these come from - and this is no exception! And for those reading the NC-17 version (if you have access to the State of The Union list - you'll find it there), this is my first real NC-17 story, so please be kind.
Once again, thank you to Bridget for beta reading this one.
~*~*~
The soldiers marching home from battle.
Well... not really.
Sometimes the senior staff *felt* like soldiers and it *was* the end of the day for them, despite the fact, that for most people, the working day had finished several hours prior. And really, they weren't so much as marching home as heading to one of their favorite bars in Georgetown. Somewhere they could drink, unwind and try to forget about work for as long as it took for someone to mention it.
Which usually wasn't very long.
It was always the same formation. Josh and Sam would lead the squadron, discussing which Republican needed to be crushed next or which senator needed to be swayed in his thinking. CJ and Donna - the honorary senior staffer - discussing the latest human rights issues that needed addressing, and what they would do - if given the chance to. Toby followed silently behind them, their guard. Musing over the way Josh could be deep in rant over a recalcitrant congressman, yet in a split second bounce 180 degrees and explain to Donna why the US, UN or whomever, hadn't already stepped into the fore and implemented the actions she had just outlined. To which she would express how inconceivably wrong it was, before Josh would merely shrug and go back to his previous rant with Sam.
They reached the Bar and like gentlemen, Josh and Sam held the door open for CJ and Donna to enter. They were rewarded with smiles for their manners, followed naturally by an ego-loaded remark from Josh. They held the door open for Toby which rewarding them with a gruff response about not looking like a woman and for them to get the hell inside.
This was their usual game play.
But on this night, after the battles of the day were over, after this march was taken and the journey to their destination ended - a new journey would be taken.
~*~*~
The table they commandeered wore the sticky glass rings from previous patrons - but it was something they ignored. This wasn't a place to worry as undoubtedly, given Josh's penchant for over exuberance, they would be added to in due course.
The other patrons were the usual mix of politicos and pundants, the odd student captured in the aura that encircled bars such as this.
Sam bought the first round, and soon they were melting into their seats, recharging their almost flat batteries.
"Josh, I'm going to be in late tomorrow morning," Donna announced after the second round of drinks had been placed on the table.
"Excuse me?" he asked, tilting his head, "shouldn't that have been ... 'please Josh, I need some time in the morning to do inane personal things instead of not bringing you coffee...' That's what you meant wasn't it?"
"Not in your wildest dreams!" she scoffed.
"Oh no. My *wildest* dreams include..." he began with a smirk.
"If you *dare* say the words *equipment* or *school uniform* Josh - so help me!" she laughed before being interrupted by CJ flailing her arms around in front of them.
CJ swallowed the mouthful of alcohol and winced before taking a breath. They were lucky she hadn't sprayed the drink across the table the moment Josh mentioned wildest dreams.
"Will you cut it out," complained CJ. "The last thing I need to deal with is a sexual harassment suit between the pair of you."
"Honestly CJ, I'd never have her... you know actually *charged*. I might make her sweat it out for a little while though," Josh joked.
"Children," came Toby's voice of authority.
"So?" Donna asked. "You have a meeting at nine a.m., and if you don't irritate Congresswoman Shillingworth in the first five minutes - it should go until at least eleven. And by then I will back dutifully at my desk - not bringing you coffee."
"I suppose," came Josh's sullen reply.
"Thank you o'master," Donna sassed with a smirk.
"Can I at least ask what matter of Donna Moss national importance requires your attention?" Josh questioned.
"Josh," Sam interrupted, then dropped his voice, "you know it may be of a... well, personal nature."
"Oh."
"Well, no its not like that Sam," Donna replied, "but thank you for pointing out to Josh the error of his ways."
"Hey - my ways don't error," he complained mischievously before taking a mouthful of his beer. "So what's the story?"
"My sister Lena had a baby girl this morning and I wanted to go and buy her something special. I wanted to wait until I knew whether she had a boy or a girl, that's why I haven't bought anything already," Donna beamed, finally a chance to share her news.
"A girl," said Sam, "come on, the rest of the details."
"Ah... 6lb. 10oz., at five am - or thereabouts. She's healthy, has fine blonde hair but short fingers. Lena says she'll have to learn something *other* than piano," laughed Donna.
"And her extremely outlandish name is?" asked Josh over his drink.
"It's our parents with the thing for names Josh. They're naming her Lauren Rose," she replied.
"That's very pretty," stated Toby.
"Toby? You just used the word pretty?" CJ commented.
"Yes I did," he replied taking a swig from his glass.
"I think it's a word we should weave into our next speech," Sam added brightly.
"I really think it isn't," replied Toby dryly.
"Hey Donna, isn't Magdalena younger than you?" Josh asked.
His question was met swiftly with a cuff to the back of his head from CJ.
"Ow! CJ, what'ja do that for?" he whined, as he rubbed the back of his head.
"Because you deserved it," she replied.
"What? Why?"
She glanced at Donna, hating the fact she had to verbalize this in front of her. "Because I don't think Donna would want to be reminded that her younger sibling is doing something before her," she stated.
"But CJ, you're fine about the fact your younger sister has three kids, you always have been?" added Toby.
"Yes, but I'm fine with that because I'm not going to have any," CJ replied.
"You don't know that CJ," said Sam. "Some guy could walk right in and sweep you..."
"No Sam. I mean it's a conscious decision. One I made many, many years ago. I'm not going to have children because I don't want to have children, not because the opportunity hasn't risen or because I don't currently have someone to have them with. I play aunt better than I could ever play Mommy."
"Oh, okay then." Sam replied with a nod.
"Well I'm going to have at least one child," stated Donna. "And there will be more than enough love and laughter and happiness in his or her life."
"And have you figured out who the luckless gomer will be?" Josh chuckled into his glass.
"Who says I need a partner? It's expensive, but I think a clinic would do just fine," she rebuked.
"What!" he spluttered.
"I once thought about donating to one of those... er, um... clinics," offered Sam.
Toby rolled his eyes.
Josh nearly choked on his drink.
"You what?"
Sam took a deep breath. "There are many couples or individuals out there who would appreciate more men making such donations so they can fulfill their desire to have a family."
"The spawn of Seaborn," Josh continued to laugh. "God, it sounds like a 'B' grade horror film!"
"Well I think it's very noble Sam," Donna nodded before glaring at Josh.
"What?" stammered Josh with an exasperated breath.
"I agree with Donna," added CJ.
"So," hypothesized Josh, "Donna could just walk into one of these places, collect her little *donation* and end up having Sam's offspring?"
"Point one," Donna started, " I could do a whole lot worse, and point two, it doesn't work like that. You can't just walk in there and *collect* a donation. I'd never know whom it was from. Basically you go there, hand them the money, they do all the security and health checks - they make sure you're not a nutter. I might add I should pass with flying colors, considering I am of perfect health and I have security clearance to work at the White House. Once they do all that, you figure out what characteristics you're looking for and then off you go," she replied.
Josh's brow creased. "Off you go? Donna..."
"Josh. If you want me to describe the procedure - blow by blow - then I will, but..."
"No! No... definitely no need. *Off you go* is a perfectly acceptable description," he replied, shifting uncomfortably.
"Good."
The rest of the staff sat quietly.
This was one battle they didn't want to get into.
"So how do you know all this, dare I ask? Researching already on government time? Surely I don't have to remind you that we have another three years in office and embarking on this little venture in the immediate future would make running my office a trifle difficult?" Josh lectured.
"Josh, I barely have enough time to look after myself while I work for you," she replied.
"So this is after the second term then?" he continued to question.
"I didn't say that either," she replied smartly.
"But..."
"Listen, I haven't made an exact decision on when, but I don't plan on being too old to enjoy my child - that's all I'm saying," she replied firmly.
"I could baby-sit from time to time for you," added CJ, deciding to weigh into the discussion. " I miss my nieces."
"My cousin Tessa," said Sam entering the discussion again, " she's a single mom and lives in Washington now. Anyway, when I can, I take her son Matthew for the day. It gives her a break. I mean she loves him, I think she would stop breathing if anything happened to him, but you know... I enjoy it too."
Toby leaned forward on the table. "My nephews... they were, and for the most part still are, absolute terrors... but my brother and his wife wouldn't be without them."
"I want that," said Donna wistfully. "To hold a baby in my arms and know that it is my own precious gift. Something that will always be part of me..."
"Yeah... and donor number 78972," Josh added before swallowing the remains of his drink. "I'm getting another, anyone else want one?"
"I'm fine thank you," Donna replied politely, determined not to let it show that his comments had hurt.
Even if Josh didn't notice, everyone else did.
"Beer," said Sam.
"I'll come with you," offered Toby as he nodded towards CJ.
"No, I'm find Tobus," she replied.
"I don't need the help," said Josh to Toby as he stood.
"Yes you do my friend," came the reply.
Josh shrugged and they headed for the bar.
"He didn't mean it like it sounded," said CJ to Donna as they watched them walk to the bar.
"Yes he did CJ," Donna replied, trying to smile, "but it's okay. Josh was just being... well Josh."
"Sometimes I wish Josh would be Sam," CJ snorted, before turning to Sam. "I meant that as a compliment by the way."
"I took it as one and I thank you," smiled Sam.
Donna sighed. "I guess he's just feeling a bit left out of the conversation. I mean, we all have some story about children. Josh doesn't have anything other than his own memories and some of them are less than pleasant," Donna offered.
"I know that," replied CJ, "but it doesn't mean he has to take that tone. Especially not with you."
"He's just worried I'll abandon him and he'll have to train another assistant," Donna shrugged.
"Why do you... how can you defend his actions the way you do?" Sam questioned. "He's been my friend for a hell of a long time, but I wouldn't let him get away with some of the stuff he tries to pull?"
"Because love is blind," replied CJ quietly before smiling at Donna.
Sam pondered for a moment and then nodded. "And if you let yourself really hear the words then..."
"Hey! I thought you asked *me*." Donna interrupted.
"He did, but we figured it out for ourselves," CJ replied, nudging Donna gently with her shoulder and chuckling.
"Honestly, you two don't know..." Donna started before Josh interrupted her.
"Okay Samuel, your beer," said Josh as he passed the drink to his friend as he and Toby rejoined them at the table. "And a large packet of crisps."
"Tomato salsa flavored?" questioned CJ.
"They didn't have any other?" added Sam with a slight frown.
"Ohh... who would want any other kind," grinned Donna as she grabbed the packet, ripped it open down the seam and placed it in the middle of the table for them to share. "These are the best," she added as she munched on one.
"Not with what we're drinking," CJ replied, glancing into her glass and then to Josh. "And speaking of drinking... Josh?"
"It's just coke," he replied, trying to sound casual.
Sam chuckled, "Two beers and he doesn't have to be told these days!"
"Hey, I just didn't feel like another beer," he replied.
"More like you didn't feel like having to ask Donna in the morning if you did or said anything you needed to apologize for and to explain exactly why you felt like crap," offered Toby.
"I will admit, there may have been some slight reflection on that which helped me reach my decision," he stated quietly.
They talked about work for a little longer and finished their drinks before deciding that they all really needed to go home. Sam was the first to leave, realizing he'd left a file on his desk that he needed first thing in the morning as he was heading to a meeting before going into the White House.
Toby noticed a taxi unoccupied outside the bar as he glanced out the window. As he and CJ lived in the same general direction they decided to share it, hurrying out before someone else had the same idea.
*
Josh shoved his hands in his pockets and scuffed his shoes on the sidewalk as he and Donna entered the late night air. His forehead wore the thinking creases she knew so well.
"What Josh?" she asked, knowing that he would only work himself up if he didn't start to verbalize his thoughts.
He opened and closed his mouth a few times before shrugging.
"So, you think it's gonna rain?" he asked, glancing up at the sky as they started to walk.
"I doubt it Josh. There's not a cloud in the sky," Donna chuckled.
"Well you never know, storms just like... blow up from no where sometimes," he shrugged.
"Josh, you've been quite since..."
"What were you guys talking about when Toby and I went to the bar?" he asked.
"Oh... nothing much," she replied; now wondering why he wanted to know. Afraid he'd missed out on some gossip?
"Toby told me I was an inconsiderate bastard and he had no idea why the hell you put up with me," Josh continued, his eyes downcast, watching his feet on the pavement.
"Actually, the conversations may have been similar," Donna sighed, at least now she knew why Toby had accompanied him to the bar. He made her miss her older brothers less sometimes. He had slotted in there and seemed to champion her cause whenever he felt it was needed.
"It's just... you'd really want to have a baby that way?" he asked, bouncing around in front of her.
Donna stopped. "If I had to... if it was my only option, then yes. I'm a modern, independent woman. And I want to be a mother."
"And you should be you know, Donna. You are just such an amazingly, incredible woman and you are so damn good at everything you do."
"Josh..."
"I was a jerk tonight Donna," he stated as he fell in beside her and they started walking again.
"Josh, don't worry about it. You were just being..."
"Yeah *me*. And more often than not that means jerk. I didn't need Toby to point it out, I already knew. But I couldn't stop myself. I was just so..."
"Pissed to think you'd have to learn to yell at someone else if I left the White House?" she smirked.
"No... jealous that one day you could have a baby that wasn't mine."
Their feet stopped.
"Josh?"
"Yeah, I know. Surprised me too when I figured it out," he shrugged.
"Josh what do you mean?" she stammered.
"I think I mean I want you to have *my* baby. Okay, so I'm not good looking like Sam, and there are some other genetic traits that any kid that is part me might inherit that you may not be too wild about... but hey, at least you've had practice at dealing with them. And just think..."
"Josh, this is all very sweet, and would save me a considerable amount of money that I could put towards the child's future, but have you really..."
"Oh I'd have rules Donna. And my rules would seriously need to be followed and not mocked." he replied.
"Oh yes?" she questioned crossing her arms in front of her. "You making rules this should be good. Let's see I suppose I would have to bring you coffee all the while I still worked for you. I guess you'd expect me to be subservient to you all the time for the privilege of having your child, I'm sure you'd expect bowing to be included and what... calling you Sir? I also guess you would want full naming rights in fear that I would give the child a name that wouldn't befit a part Lyman."
"Donna! Christ, take that all back! Please tell me you take all that back and you don't mean it? Do you really think that little of me to believe I would make you... God take it back now Donna!"
"Okay... okay," she repeated softly, seeing the hurt in his eyes. "I'm sorry... it's just, well it's just that you've spent most of the night being a total snarky bastard to me. I don't know what to expect at the moment because you're now acting like someone I don't see very often and I don't want to get lost in the euphoria of your latest revelation because I don't know how long it will be until you turn back to the other guy again."
"You know you should try and breathe whilst talking sometimes Donna. It helps," Josh replied, his dimples making a fleeting appearance - all was forgiven.
"Josh, please..."
"Look, I won't promise that guy is gone forever, because we both know me better than that, but he's gone for tonight. I promise, I left him getting drunk back at the Bar," he smiled. "Believe me?"
"Yes."
"Okay, then," he nodded and they started walking again.
"So, what are your rules Joshua?" she asked cautiously.
"Well, first I wouldn't be happy if you decided to move to the other side of the country. I mean absentee parenting is obviously rife through the Beltway. So many guys here end up watching their kid's lives through the photo they update on their desks rather than watching it first hand. I wouldn't want that. I would want to be able to spend time with our child, and it would make it all the worse if you were living in California or somewhere like that. Which I guess leads me to the point that I would want to be allowed to play Dad when it was okay with you. I don't think I'll ever have the opportunity any other time, and although I'd probably suck at it, I'd like to try. And if my Mom... well she's always wanted grandchildren, so if it was okay with you, well... you know, I'd like her to be able to visit and stuff. And as for names... well you did say it was your parents who liked non traditional names, not you... but I'd like to be able to offer suggestions towards your final decision."
"Josh, you're... you're *serious*?" she said slowly, letting all the words swirling in her head sink in.
"Yes, I don't think I've been *this* serious about anything since... well I'm not sure I can compare it to anything else," he replied.
"And... if we did this Josh, what makes you think that I wouldn't want you to be around us? How could you think I would consider moving to the other side of the country?" she said stopping.
"You know I can be a moody son-of-a-bitch. The thought of escaping, well I couldn't put up with it the way you do," he offered.
"If we did this, I would want you around," she replied seriously. "I mean I will probably go back to University if I can, study part-time."
"I'd want to be more than a baby-sitter, Donna. That's what *aunt* CJ is for," he nodded back down the street and chuckled. "If you... if we... well, I would want to be there."
"Josh... you um, realize that if we... err... *did* this, it would have to be the old-fashioned way?" she smirked, wondering if he'd still be interested.
"Can we practice?" Josh asked cheekily before wrapping his arms around Donna quickly and planting his lips firmly on hers. There was nothing tentative about the kiss, and as he attempted to deepen it, he was pleasantly surprised there was no sudden pain emanating from the back of his head *or* groin region.
They stood wrapped around each other on the sidewalk, the glow of a nearby streetlight illuminating them to anyone passing by. It wasn't until a car horn sounded as it passed, that they broke apart.
"Was that... um..."
"Josh, you kissed me."
"Ah, yeah... you, I believe you kissed me back so I really think that contemplating serious injury to me at this point would..."
"Josh, I... you... why did you kiss me?"
"I could ask why you kissed me back?" he grinned.
"Josh," she complained with a similar grin.
"Donna, you know I wouldn't mind it if you thought about us sharing a place if we did this. You know, it would make sense... it would save money on rent and I could be on hand whenever you needed me to..."
"Josh..."
"Look it would make sense Donna," he said bouncing on the balls of his feet. "You could go to a University here and we..."
"Josh?"
"Yes?"
"How did we get here?"
Josh looked around and realized they were standing outside his apartment building.
"I'm not too sure," he chuckled, continuing to bounce his nervous energy around her. "I guess my feet are used to taking my drunken body home and they just knew the way."
"But you're not drunk and they usually know the way to *my* apartment!" she laughed.
"Well perhaps they just know how to find you, because you're right here with me," he motioned.
"That I am Joshua."
"Donna, would you like to come in and..."
"Practice?"
"Um... well I wasn't going to say that because I don't want to risk losing those parts of my body that would be required for such an activity, but since *you* mentioned it, well... then... I was figuring it might be a good thing?"
"Josh, you've spent 14 to 16 hour days in the office all this week, not to mention a couple of beers in the past two hours, are you... are you *capable* of following through with this?" Donna queried.
"Honestly?"
"Of course."
"I don't know. Please believe me if I prove incapable... the intent is there Donna."
"It'll be okay," she smiled.
"You'll pay out on me forever though, won't you?" he replied cautiously.
"Of most definitely," she grinned.
"I'd better make sure I get this right then," he replied.
"Josh," she breathed as she reached out for his hand. "What are we doing?"
"Something we should have done a long time ago," he replied with a grin as he led her into the building.
~*~
"That was..."
"Yeah," Josh breathed.
"We just... and it was..."
"Exquisite."
"Exquisite?"
"760, remember?" he smiled.
"Of course," Donna nodded.
"I'm thinking we might be good at this," he stated, kissing her shoulder.
"You're able to think?" she chuckled.
"Well..."
"Josh?"
"Yes?"
"I can't breathe..."
Josh realized that the full weight of his body was on hers, and while he enjoyed the contact, it didn't leave Donna much chance for important things... like breathing.
"Geez Donna, why didn't you say something sooner?" he replied as he rolled onto his side, taking her with him.
"I had to regain my powers of speech," she grinned.
"So, do you think we might have... you know, just before, done something that is going to be... life changing... for both of us?" Josh asked, as he slid his arm under Donna's head.
"Oh I think all of this is fairly life changing," she replied.
"Donna... you know what I mean..."
"So instead of bathing in the afterglow... we should discuss the chances of whether or not you impregnated me?" she mused, trying to keep a straight face.
"Donna... do you have to sound so... clinical about it?"
Josh looked up and saw the smile dancing in her eyes.
"I'm sure you'd have the stats," he replied.
"Well I did do all that research on teen pregnancies for you Josh."
"Somehow I don't think you'll qualify as a teen!"
"Lucky for you," she laughed out loud, " because I think you'd be in a whole heap of trouble if I was!"
"You're my assistant Donna, who says I won't be anyway?"
"Well, if it were to become a thing, at least it might only be *one* thing, not two."
"Huh?"
"The *first* thing would be we were sleeping together, the *second* that you got me 'in the family way.' If we did it all tonight, it would only be one thing, not two."
"Well *there's* a positive spin on it for CJ," he deadpanned.
"I'll say," she sniggered
"We could always make it legal," Josh shrugged.
"Why would we want to do that?"
"Well... it sounded like a good idea in my head," he offered.
"Josh... only a few hours ago you were joking about, and I quote "who the luckless gomer" would be. And *since* then, you have volunteered to *be* said gomer and now you're talking about being the *permanent* gomer in my life?"
"You know, it's at this point I realize how much I regret coining the term *gomer* in relation to the guys you've dated previously."
"Josh I'm not even dating anyone *currently* so..."
"You're dating me..."
"No, I just had the most increditable mind blowing..."
"Don't say sex Donna. Please, this is more than that to me," he interrupted.
She smiled, leaned forward and kissed him. "Cliché number what? Yes, I understand it's more than that... but date? We haven't done that yet."
"What about tonight?" he asked as he lifted her up whilst struggling to get the comforter from underneath them.
She laughed out loud as she helped him pull the covers over their exhausted bodies.
"You, me, Sam, CJ and Toby - all rung out after a hell of a week at the White House, does *not* constitute a date."
"Does the fact I love you and I should have told you years ago count for anything?" he asked, tentatively.
A small satisfied smile escaped her lips. "Yes it does."
"Will you stay tonight, please?" he asked, cautiously.
She nestled into his arms, "I'd like that."
"I'd like that too," he replied closing his eyes.
"Josh?"
"Hmm?"
"Thank you for the crisps."
"The crisps?"
"Tomato-salsa flavored - at the Bar tonight, thank you."
"They're your favorite," he mumbled, the soporific effects of their activities beginning to take hold.
"I know... but more importantly, you knew."
"I just..." he tightened his arm around her; he wasn't sure what he wanted to say.
"Go to sleep Josh."
"Goodnight Donna," he replied, kissing the top of her head.
"Night."
They lay there, listening to each other breathing.
"Donna?"
"Yes Josh?"
" 'you think we made a baby tonight?"
"I don't know... maybe."
"Yeah," he sighed contentedly, "maybe...."
"Goodnight Joshua."
The end.