Happy New Year's, everyone! Sorry for cutting it close to the deadline, but I've been spending some quality time with a brand new PS3. For everyone who doesn't know what this "A Winn3r is You!" project is, please look up the author known as avatarjk137. For those that do, this is my secondary entry. Sorry if it's a tad short, but I thought that my first entry was a tad too long, and…well…yeah.

TEAM DISGAEA PROLOGUE – CONVINCING THE PRINCE

~.~

The Netherworld. One of various areas in space and time similar to the one most humans are aware of, but brimming with darkness and evil at every corner. It is a land where demons thrive, vying to gain dominance over one another and earn as much power as they can. In these locations, if one doesn't keep their guard up at all time, they will soon find themselves reduced to a corpse. It is a world where-

"STUPID LOUSY GAME! If I ever find the idiot that programmed this piece of trash, I'll slice his freaking head off!"

…Ahem. To get to the point, in one of these Netherworlds live our protagonists. Laharl, the ruler of all he surveyed, was currently struggling at a video game, his inner rage slowly but surely building up over time. His primary two vassals, Flonne and Etna, were standing nearby in case he decided to blow something up. A 'Slaystation 3' may no longer be worth $599, but they sure as heck weren't cheap.

"It doesn't look like you're doing too badly, Prince," Flonne uttered, trying to comfort the young Overlord. "It looks like you're doing more damage now than the last time you tried, at least."

"That's because I'm channeling pure hate from my mind, into the controller in my hands, through a wireless connection with the console, into the GAME ITSELF, and going from my character's FISTS into my ENEMY'S FACE, ONE PUNCH AT A TIME!" Laharl shouted. Thankfully for the machine, he managed to beat the boss he was fighting soon after, saving it from a future in a scrap heap. "About damn time, too. Dammit, it's easier to murder real people than it is to beat up those pixilated jerks."

"Oh, that reminds me. After SOMEONE decided to eat my dessert, ONCE AGAIN," Etna said, glaring at Laharl every time she raised her voice, "I decided to go online and see if the Sea of Gehenna was still selling those rare puddings. To make a long story short, some guy's rallying demons together in order to beat the crap out of some human dorks for fun and profit."

"…Um, maybe next time, you should stick with the long version of the story," Flonne told Etna, scratching her head as she tried to connect the events talked about.

"Well, the guy's made out of chocolate," Etna semi-elaborated. It was still enough for Flonne to get the picture, though.

"Look, regardless of how you found out about this thing, I'm not really interested," Laharl declared. "If it's just a bunch of measly humans, I have better things to do with my time. If you need an extra meat shield, there are plenty of idiots that would love to join you. That stupid Asagi chick keeps telling everyone that she should be a protagonist, and I hear that Gig guy loves chaotic bloodshed."

"Oh, didn't you hear the news? He's dead," Etna said, bluntly. "By complete and utter coincidence, he and some mage friend of his were killed in a tournament held by the guys chocolate-boy wants us to slaughter. Oddly enough, one of Marjorly's kitty minions was also there, and it managed to get out alive. Guess grim reapers ain't what they used to be…"

"Okay, so these guys got lucky. But I still don't give a crap," Laharl replied, steadfast in his single-mindedness. "You really wanna go and waste your time with this thing? Just go; if you're this excited by cheap thrills, you're not worthy of serving me anyways. Oh, and take those Earth 'zeroes' with you; may as well get rid of all of you while I have the chance."

"DID SOMEBODY CALL FOR SOME HEROES?"

"Oh, great. Cue the moron brigade," Etna moaned as Laharl's bedroom door was kicked open. In a flash, Captain Gordon, 37th Defender of Earth and his partners Jennifer and Thursday charged inside and posed as a team because shit just got real…well, real enough for them.

"As a paragon of justice and a defender of the American way, it would be wrong of us not to help out an ally in need, be ye devil or otherwise!" Gordon declared. "And, if our actions will be broadcast across the multiverse and could inspire more people to become heroes, then even more wrongness shall occur if we do not respond to this plea! Not even a catastrophe of the grandest proportions imaginable will keep my eager squad and me from assisting in this time of need, and we shall give it our all for the pursuit of peace and righteousness! Isn't that right, faithful sidekicks Jennifer and Thursday?"

Jennifer and Thursday, used to their captain's antics by now, enthusiastically smiled and gave a thumbs-up towards him. "Well, of course we will! You know we'd follow you to the edge of space itself and back anytime, Captain Gordon!" uttered Jennifer, giving a flirtatious wink for extra emphasis.

Etna, however, wasn't as thrilled by the speech as Gordon's lackeys were. "...Were you eavesdropping on us from outside? 'Cause you mooks charged in here pretty quickly."

"Dramatic gasp!" boldly uttered Captain Gordon, 37th Defender of Earth. "How dare you accuse great heroes such as us of a nefarious deed such as eavesdropping! As ambassadors from a planet filled with justice and hope, I'm appalled that you would even think we would stoop to such lows! Why, we were merely practicing our surveillance and espionage techniques, and it was mere coincidence that you guys were actually in here! Isn't that right, guys?"

There was a moment of notable silence, followed by Thursday speaking up in his loud, monotonous tone. "BEEP BEEP BLIP BEEP. SORRY, GORDON, BUT LYING IS NO LONGER WITHIN MY PARAMETERS. JENNIFER HAD TO DELETE THAT FUNCTION TO INSTALL THE LATEST WI-FI UPDATE."

Captain Gordon, 37th Defender of Earth, was rendered speechless for a few moments. He then called for a strategic withdrawal to take place immediately, and ran out of the room like a chicken with its head cut off before he could be punished, quickly followed by his teammates.

"…Um, Sir Laharl? I know that you don't want to go, but I think it would be a really, really good idea if you did," stated Flonne the fallen angel once Captain Gordon's trio was long gone. "I mean, everyone's so excited about this, and I think it sounds really, really fun. But I just wouldn't feel right if we had some amazing adventure if it means leaving you here all alone with the Prinnies. My poor little heart just might not take such a depressing thought! Can't you reconsider, pretty please?"

"…You know what? Fine. A guy can only take so much annoying badgering from his minions. If it'll shut the rest of you up, I guess I can go and pummel some mortals for a few days," Laharl stated. Of course, whether he really gave in because his earlobes were starting to throb, or because he realized how lonely he could get without anyone to whine to, was anyone's guess.

"Great to hear, Prince!" said Etna, as she clasped her hands together in excitement. "Now, all we need is someone to sponsor us…after all, if we can get a few quick bucks for doing this, why not?"

"Ah, that sounds like my cue."

Everyone in the room turned around to face the source of the mysterious voice. Laharl was about to blast him for trespassing on his property, especially since the stranger was now violating the privacy of his room, but opted not to after sensing his power. After all, even in the darkest corners of the Land of Carnage, where foul beings with powers surpassing a billion overlords carve each others' carcasses for the sheer glory of battle, it was rare to find a being that radiated as much power as this odd guest. And not just any being; it was a lich, an animate skeleton of what once may have been a powerful human warlock. If nothing else, the red cape and shiny crown he was wearing suggested some kind of importance.

"Allow me to introduce myself," the stranger said. "The name's Xykon. Xykon…well, when you've got the power to turn an army of paladins against one another using nothing but a simple sigil and a bouncy ball, one name's really all you need. Couldn't help but overhear your conversation while using my rather amazing magical powers to take a peak through rifts in space and time, and decided to cut out any middlemen by coming directly to you and making a proposition. So, how about this: I give you some cash, and you try not to suck too hard. Oh, and if you see a bunch of cliché warriors led by a Negro named Roy? Pardon the pun, but I've got a 'bone' to pick with him; good for you if you can knock them down, but I call dibs on the kill. So, kiddos, do we have a deal?"

The young Overlord didn't even hesitate to answer. "Yeah, we've got a deal. Just show us where this thing's being held, and we'll show you just how much power we've got. In fact, we'll cause such a massacre that the name Laharl shall henceforth bring tears to the eyes of weak-willed babies, and induce terror throughout the hearts of all mankind! Haaaah-ha ha ha ha ha!"

PROLOGUE – END

~.~

And so, a partnership has been formed between the young brat and the otherworldly skeleton man! But, it is soon revealed that there's something that they love even greater than bloodshed!

"Dammit, Etna, this is a Fanfiction. You don't have the right to make up any Previews for this!"

What is this forbidden passion? Why, it's…the dramatic arts! With personalities like theirs, it's amazing that it wasn't obvious from the start! Tragedy, comedy, even the art of Japanese Kabuki…the theatre has called out for their talents, and they'll do anything to answer its call!

"You know, people who haven't played our games are going to think this is really, really weird."

Killing is easy, but can they 'make a killing' in the big city? It's going to take a lot of make-up before Xykon's face is ready for the big screen, and Laharl's hair is always a mess! Will they be able to endure it all and achieve their hopes and dreams, or are they doomed to panhandle on the streets for eternity?

"Look, I already agreed to be the leader for the team. This is just unnecessary torture."

Next time, on A Winn3r Is You: Beautiful Team Etna! The First Real Chapter! "No Business, 'Lich' Show Business"! Broadway will be taken by storm, quite literally, and one tortured soul at a time!

"…You should've just stayed with Adell and Rozalin, you know that?"

And that's the end of the intro of my second entry, featuring speaking roles by everyone on the team and of their sponsor. Originally, I was going to go with the stars of Disgaea 3…but as the note in the introduction implies, I didn't even have a PS3 until Christmas, so I opted for Laharl and his vassals instead. Was this a good decision? Guess you'll have to wait until the tournament begins to find out!