"What's wrong?"
"Hm?" Hawke continued to stare out the window, intently watching the moonlight's shadows change across the courtyard below, as the waves crashed against the non so distant shoreline.
"You've been staring out that window for hours now. Something's on your mind."
Hawke didn't turn around, but spoke thoughtfully, "It's Anders. I've been thinking about what happened."
"He deserved what he got, Hawke."
"Did he? I suppose that's a stupid question. He did. He destroyed the city when he destroyed the Chantry, but..." she trailed off for a moment, before continuing, "I just feel like I should've seen it coming. I should've been able to change what happened. To both the chantry and to Anders."
"Do you wish you'd saved him?"
Hawke shrugged, leaning against the window frame, "Maybe. Killing him...I felt cold. I didn't feel like it was the right thing to do. It didn't feel wrong either. And now he's no use. For better or worse, he did help a lot of people, and not just the mage apostates here and there. He helped the refugees, and asked nothing in return. He also helped the Hero of Ferelden against the Architect. For better or worse, he wasn't evil."
"Obviously."
Hawke perked her attention at that; to hear those words coming from him surprised her. He continued, "I may not have been fond of him, and I don't really regret his death, but I didn't know him the way you did. He helped your sister when no one else could, and that made you happy. And that had meaning to me. Perhaps he could've helped to undo the damage. To atone. But it's too late now for regrets."
Hawke slumped her shoulders, "You're right. I just still wish there was a way I could've changed the outcome of that. We wouldn't be in hiding if I'd only made him tell me what he needed to go to the Chantry for."
"Maybe. Or maybe your insistence would've been a breaking point for him. He was losing himself to the spirit, that much we could all see."
She sighed, "I suppose so."
"Come to bed, you must be tired."
She turned around, smiling gently at the elf waiting expectantly for her. She padded across the unfamiliar pub's room, and slid under the covers, to find what comfort she might in Fenris' arms.