This is in btween the sceen at Doose's and before Sookie comes to the rescue!
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Lorelai flung herself on her bed. How...how had he been able to say those things? How had he been able to say THAT? Clinging to the nearest available object she took a deep breath in an attempt to calm herself. That attempt was in vain. Her breath hitched and soon she was sobbing uncontrollably.
This had never hurt so much before. She'd never felt like this before. With or without Luke, she'd never had these feelings. Without...that thought sent her into a fresh wave or tears. This, she thought, this is why I stayed blind, so this wouldn't happen. So I wouldn't screw up. How could I have screwed this up? Oh..yeah... I'm me...
In her mind she knew she had to get back to the Inn. Back to Sookie and Michel and the little girls and their tea party...
But for that moment, that tiny instant, she didn't care about getting back to the Inn. Back to Sookie and Michel and the little girls. She just wanted Luke.
She wanted Luke to come up the stairs and tell her she was being ridiculous and that coffee was rotting her brain and to get back to work.
She wanted him to sit next to her and hold her and kiss her forehead and smooth her hair and tell her that it would all be ok, just like he always did.
She wanted Luke to come in and sweep her off her feet and tell her that he was wrong.
She wanted him to tell her that he could handle it.
She wanted him to tell her that he believed her.
Lorelai wiped furiously at her eyes as the tears continued to pour down her cheeks. She wanted so many things that she knew weren't going to happen. She tried to hang on to that happy feeling she'd discovered when her mother had asked her if she wanted that, if she wanted a wedding and she had finally realized that she did. For the first time in her life she really truly wanted it.
She wanted a wedding. She wanted to be married. She didn't want to be by herself anymore.
She wanted Luke.
And now she'd never get him back.
And she was stupid to think that he'd stay and put up with all of her bull and lies and secrets. He was right, she should have told him, regardless of what had or hadn't happened. God, she thought, He had the right to know, he's my boyfriend...was..., she added after a few seconds.
She didn't know anything that could fix this. She knew that somehow, she would have to find a way. She couldn't let him walk away.
She also knew, that if that was what he really wanted, she would let him.
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GAH! I cried! It was horrible!