Oikawa knew he should say something. He was the captain, wasn't he? It was his turn to cheer up and motivate his team. After all, he was the one who failed to receive the ball.
He let out a small curse once again, following the rest of the team into the bus. He blamed himself for it all, and although he was holding a facade of confidence, he could feel himself crumbling on the inside.
As he stepped into the bus last, his gaze skimmed over the saddened faces of his team mates, and mentally punched himself once again. Some eyes shined with unshed tears, others were bloodshot, and some just held an expression of empty-ness, as if they had nothing left to their life.
Sitting himself down next to Iwaizumi, Oikawa let out a sigh and ran his fingers through his hair, tugging slightly at the roots. His fault, it was truly his fault. Hell, he couldn't even say a word to his team mates as a captain.
He allowed his thoughts to trail off into a deep void of nothing as the bus left the premises of the court. He wanted to distract himself, but sleeping like everyone else would only bring him bad dreams.
Tugging once again at his hair, he pulled out his phone and earplugs. As he played some random song on shuffle, his gaze shifted to the dark-haired boy beside him.
Iwaizumi's eyes were clearly bloodshot, an immediate sign of tears. His gaze was rooted to the streets outside the window, and his hands were curled into fists on his lap.
If they had won, Oikawa knew his friend wouldn't be like this, he knew he wouldn't have been crying post-match, he would be jumping with joy and preparing to train for the final match.
It was his fault Iwaizumi was like this, and it made the setter's heart clench. He was in love with him, which was obvious to almost everyone but the ace, and the fact that he had cried over Oikawa's fault made him feel even worse than before.
He allowed another sigh to escape his lips, knowing full-well that this blame wouldn't fade away. Of course, everyone didn't blame their captain for the loss, but Oikawa was Oikawa, and regardless of what others may say, he still would shoulder the baggage.
Eventually, the brunette had fallen asleep, his head slumping onto Iwazumi's shoulder. The dark-haired boy watched the captain's chest rise and fall, taking note of the way his hair had become messy and the few tears that had clearly escaped unnoticed.
Iwaizumi had blamed himself for not being a good enough ace, but the reassuring pats on the back from his team mates and the speeches he had gotten after the match were enough for him to remove the shouldering burden.
Oikawa wasn't that simple, and his friend knew that. He knew that the brunette would hide his pain and suffering behind a smile, he knew he would blame himself everyday at practice.
Shaking his head slightly, Iwaizumi turned his gaze back to the window, shaking his head slightly. Of course, he told himself that he would make his captain feel better.
I mean, that's what friends do for their friend that their secretly in love with (but unaware of it), right?
As the bus neared the school, the teammates were awakened by their coach. All Oikawa wanted to do was go home, however he knew that the minute he stepped foot into solitude, his facade would crumble and he would be sobbing till the morning.
He stepped out of the bus and into the gym, deciding that he had to fulfill his captain duties as the team huddled together onto the floor.
"You all played well, and you all did incredibly. We didn't win though, and I know that us third years won't have another chance at nationals, but our future teams, for the years to come, will have incredible opportunities that won't go to waste." The captain began, pausing to take in a shaky breathe.
"I know that you fought with all your might, I know that we didn't make to fighting with Shiratorizawa. I know that we couldn't accomplish nationals, but regardless of all this, we did good. You all accomplished more than you know, and I know you want to find ways to blame yourselves, but please don't. As your captain, I'm proud of your fight and strength. Good work, each and every one of you."
Another shaky breathe escaped Oikawa as he completed his speech, and chose to leave it at that, heading out of the gym and out of the gates of the school.
As he did so, he heard footsteps behind him, and soon enough a voice spoke out.
"Oikawa, you can't blame yourself." The setter stopped in his tracks, turning to Iwaizumi. "Iwa-chan, don't say that. I'm fine." A tight smiled formed on the boy's lips, causing a huff to escape his friend.
"You're lying," The ace began, taking in a breathe, "and I know you're shouldering all this guilt due to losing. You're putting yourself down because you think that if you received that last spike we could have won, but you're wrong. Karasuno got stronger, and it showed that we didn't have the strength. I also know that you're waiting to be alone to fall apart, I saw you on the bus. You don't have to be alone though, and you don't have to shoulder this burden."
As the words escaped Iwaizumi's lips, Oikawa could feel the tears burning inside his eyes and his vision blurring. All at once, a hot track of tears made its way down his cheeks, and he crumbled in front of the dark haired boy.
"I wanted us to stay on court longer, Iwa-chan. I wanted more chances to fight with you, to fight with the team. I wanted to be victors, I didn't want to lose this." The sobs escaped his lips faster than he could stop them, but the ace made no move to turn away.
Instead, he placed a reassuring hand over the captain's own, squeezing gently. "I wanted more chances with you too, after all, this might be our last year together."
"I wanted to stay on court! I don't want this to be our last year, and I believed that one more match would allow us to have one more chance to stay together. It's all my fault, it's always going to be my fault." Oikawa continued, stopping to take in a breathe and attempt to control his rapid breathing.
His heart was pounding in his chest, his cheeks wet and his breathe uneven. As he took in more breathes, Iwazumi swiped a finger against the boy's cheeks, wiping away some tears. Another hand went around his waist.
"You shouldn't blame yourself. After all, a team is made of six people, is it not? Anyone could have tried to receive that spike, you didn't have to be the only one who tried. You fell onto a table to catch one of the many hits, and yet you're still blaming yourself?" A small chuckle escaped the dark haired boy's lips, and Oikawa managed to crack a watery smile.
"You fought just as hard as everyone else, if not harder. You did what you could, and no one will ever say it was your fault." Iwaizumi concluded, and instead of a response, the brunette buried his face in his friend's chest, allowing more sobs to rack his body.
The ace wrapped both his arms around his setter, silently praying that Oikawa couldn't hear the rapid beating of his heart. The sobs escaping his friend only made the feeling in his chest worsen, making his grip around the brunette tighten slightly.
Oikawa's hands moved to grip the front of Iwaizumi's shirt, the track of tears refusing to stop. He knew he shouldn't be burdening the dark haired boy with the tedious task of "comforting" him, but the slight happiness that swelled in his heart said otherwise.
Moments of silence were passing between the two, the only sounds being the captain's soft sniffles. One of the ace's hands hand found its way into Oikawa's hair, running his fingers gently through the small curls. He truly didn't know what else to say, but he decided to speak up anyway.
"It's not your fault, and it will never be your fault. Regardless of what anyone may say, although I don't think anyone will say anything, it won't ever be considered your fault, not by a long shot. You're one of the best captains the volleyball world may know, as well as one of the best setters. To be quite honest, I don't see myself spiking any sets besides yours, and that scares me for the future. But Oikawa, for now, please don't blame yourself."
A pause passed between the pair, then Oikawa sniffled, lifting his head to look up at the ace. As he did, Iwaizumi's hands cupped the brunette's cheeks, wiping away all stray tears.
A smile formed on the boys face, his grip on the shirt staying constant as he said, "Thank you for this all, Iwa-chan. I don't know how I could have done this if I were alone."
Iwaizumi smiled, "Believe me, I wouldn't be here if I didn't love you."
He didn't mean for it to come out like that, but at this point, he didn't care. He didn't care about which team mates may be spying in the distance, nor did he care about the bypassers across the street.
His gaze was fixed on the way Oikawa's eyes lit up, changing from a void of sadness to a bright sun, the way a wide grin found its way onto his face, and the way his cheeks flushed a perfect hue of pink. His gaze was fixed on the way Oikawa's lips made out the words, "I love you too.", and the way their lips molded together perfectly.
Sure, they had lost their chances at nationals, and maybe that might have been their last offical match as members of Seijou. But in that moment, both Oikawa and Iwaizumi knew that it wasn't the last match for the two of them.
As the two pulled away for air, a smile was present on both their faces. Oikawa's cheeks still contained a trace of pink, however to Iwazumi, that blush was better than any tear stains.
For a moment, as the two walked home hand in hand, they forgot about the loss, for they were too focused on the way they gained each other.
BONUS / THE NEXT DAY:
"Oi, Iwaizumi, did you finally get some?"
"Oh yeah, he tot-"
"GOD DAMMIT OIKAWA, SHUT UP."
:-)