Thanks to featherxquill for beta-ing this 15 months ago lmao. Enjoy!
You're rather apprehensive as you walk into the hotel bar. God only knows why you've chosen a career in the police force, but you have and now you're about to meet the people on your training course. There are a lot of men. You weren't expecting otherwise, to be honest, but you had hoped for a couple of women to escape the testosterone with. You go up to the bar and get a glass of red wine, a good starting point at any social gathering.
Then you spot her in the corner. The first thing you notice about her is that she's very small. Initially, she seems like someone who needs protecting, someone fragile, and you wonder why on earth she made the decision to join the police. However, when she looks up, gently flicking her long auburn hair, you see the determined look on her face and know that she's definitely made the right decision. With a determined jawline like that, she'll be ACPO rank one day. She catches your eye and it feels like she's seeing right into your soul. You find yourself gravitating towards her. You need to work her out.
'Hiya, I'm Julie,' you say, more quietly than you intended. It's strange; you've never been shy, yet here you are, almost dumbfounded by this girl you've only just set eyes on. You proffer your hand and she takes it, looking at you curiously.
'Gill,' she says as you sit down opposite her. 'Well, it's actually Gillian, but nobody really calls me that apart from my mother when she's angry!' It's a good ice-breaker and you find yourself warming to her, wanting to know more about her.
You're glad you aren't the only woman on the training course. You think it would have felt very long if it was just you and a bunch of guys. Having Gill with you means that you can relax a little and find common ground in not only the fact that you're women, but also in the fact that you seem to be the only two women on the course.
You chat about which part of Manchester you come from, your families, why you'd chosen to join the police force. Then she asks you that question.
'So, have you got a boyfriend?' She has a twinkle in her eye and you can tell that she's also relieved to have a female friend.
'No, I don't. Never have done, never will do,' you say bluntly, but there's a part of you that's a little apprehensive. You really couldn't care less if people didn't approve of your homosexuality, in general. Gill's different. You want her to like you.
'What, not even one you went out with for a week just to stop him following you around the school field?' she asks incredulously.
'I went to a girls' school.'
'Oh, I see.' A pause. 'Are you gay?' She sounds, if you're not just kidding yourself, happy. You nod nonchalantly and she grins.
'Why the Cheshire Cat face?' you ask. She looks down into her lap, her face partially covered by her hair, but you can see her grin still. Her eyes meet yours again and she shifts slightly in her chair.
'I'm bisexual,' she says. You jerk back in shock, with a bemused smile on your face.
'You're kidding!' you manage and she shakes her head.
'Nope,' she laughs. 'But I'm not with anyone at the moment.' You know she wants to find out your relationship status and you are more than glad to tell her.
'Me neither.' There's a slightly tense moment as you look at each other and you realise that this blossoming friendship could be your most important yet.
'I, um...' You know you have to say something or it's just going to become awkward. 'So, have you actually had relationships with both?' You've never actually come across it before, at least not to your knowledge, and you're curious.
'Yeah, I had a couple of boyfriends early on in school. They weren't proper relationships, you know. The kind of boyfriends every girl gets just because their friend's got one too.'
'Apart from me,' you interject.
'Yes, ok, apart from you. But you're different. Good different.' She gives you a crooked smile before remembering what she was saying. 'Anyway, I did get quite confused after that, at about 15. I realised I was attracted to women. I think it all started with my English teacher. She was beautiful. I missed not one of her lessons in the 2 years she taught me. I was never ill, but I missed other lessons for appointments and, yes, I did bunk a lesson once, don't judge me. I forgot my apron for Domestic Sciences. That teacher was scary enough to face even with all the right equipment, so no way was I going into that classroom without my apron. I hid in the toilets!' She laughs a loud, hearty laugh. You join in, enjoying her reminiscing. Bloody hell, reminiscing? You're only 18!
'I had a massive thing for one of my teachers, too. My Latin teacher.' You close your eyes and see her face, remembering the time you made a funny comment and she lit up. It gave you a huge sense of pride to make her laugh and you spent the rest of your school days one inch away from overstepping the mark with your flirting.
You realise that you've drifted off into your own thoughts and Gill hasn't spoken. As you open your eyes, she scoffs.
'You studied Latin? Where d'you go, Manchester High School?' You frown at her mocking and her face changes. She croaks, trying to find the right words.
'You went to Manchester High School?' she asks quietly. You nod. You're not quite sure how to go about this. Luckily, Gill speaks again.
'I just didn't expect to meet anyone from private school ever in my life. I've got nothing against it.' You can tell she's trying to appease you and you appreciate the effort.
'What, completely different worlds?' A smirk sneaks onto your face.
'Well, yeah. I went to my local comprehensive, so...' she trails off, leaving you to make of that statement what you will. You assume it wasn't a great experience, but you don't doubt that she did well in her exams.
'So anyway.' You reel her back into the original conversation. 'Your English teacher?'
'Yes, my English teacher. Well, she was straight and engaged and a teacher, so that was never going anywhere, but it made me wonder. There was one girl who I'd heard liked to bat for the other team every now and then, so I sort of had a bit of a thing with her in Lower Sixth. It wasn't serious, but at least I knew what I was.' She smiles, and you know that she's comfortable in herself, just like you are.
'I always was more attracted to women,' you reveal. 'I spent ages trying to work out why, then I realised that it's just who I am, nothing's made me this way.' You realise that you've turned away a little, fiddling with your hands. She's looking at you, you can feel it. You look at her and see a look of understanding and interest in her eyes.
'D'you want to go into Manchester on Friday, after college? Have a drink, let off steam?' It's tentative, her question, but you slowly nod and her face relaxes.