My heart ached. It ached in a way that I couldn't even begin to express. What had I done? My own sister, her heart frozen again by my magic, just like I had done when we were kids.
"Don't worry, Anna. I've got you." I started to cry. "Mama! Papa!"
I had hurt her. She trusted me to be her big sister and I had betrayed her.
Things would never be the same. I knew it never would be. And what now? That blonde-headed man is off to take her to someone that might could help, but even I know it's hopeless.
Again, I have hurt her.
Again, I am responsible.
What would Mama and Papa say?
"Conceal, don't feel," he said to me as he handed me those gloves.
I couldn't hide it forever. I knew I couldn't. Now I'm responsible for the freeze of Arendelle, the very land that just crowned me their queen. I never deserved it. Anna will make a better queen, yes. She will do much better than I know I will ever be able.
How could they love someone like me? Like… a witch? I'm just an ice witch, that's all I ever will be to them, to her, to anyone. They need someone better. Anna will make a beautiful queen someday.
"Do you wanna build a snowman?" she said to me so many times.
God, I wish I could have told her the truth. About how I couldn't control it. I suppose now she'll know. I'm sure she'll understand eventually. Things will be better.
I began to cry. "I don't want to die!" I shouted, falling to my knees. My own chamber of ice had become my prison. The ice turned a blueish red, marking my own anger, my own hatred for myself.
I was losing my mind. I knew one day this curse of mine would one day overtake me. I was never strong enough. I would never be strong enough. If I were so strong, I could have prevented harming my sister again.
I had to save her, somehow, someway. But how? I couldn't leave that castle… Arendelle would be in danger by my presence.
"Listen to me, Elsa, your power will only grow. There is beauty in it… but also great danger. You must learn to control it. Fear will be your enemy." Oh, Grand Pabbie, I failed all of you.
I failed Mama.
I failed Papa.
I failed Arendelle.
I failed Anna.
"ANNA!" I shouted. "I'm so sorry! I wanted to help you! I wanted to watch you grow! I wanted to be the sister you wanted me to be!"
For once, I felt cold. I had never felt cold before.
Something in my mind had settled. I had cried for too long. I had to make a decision to save Arendelle, to save my sister.
I stood in the center of my castle. There would be only one way to secure all of their safety. To ensure that my parents' work was not entirely in vain.
Tonight, my curse, my demon, would die with me.
The question would be how, and only one way I could find the most appropriate. Shedding my own blood wouldn't be regal at all. Then again, did a regal stature even matter here?
No, I knew a way. I knew the most vulnerable part of my own body in the icy hell. Even my own heart wouldn't be able to withstand my own curse.
I looked around my castle, my final resting place. I would need a place to redirect my own power. I looked above my balcony door. A single, mirror-like, snowflake sat as a center-piece.
"It must be done," I told myself. In a single breath, I gathered up all of my energy into my hands. "Arendelle will be freed. Anna will be saved."
In a single beam of my magic, I shot everything I had within me towards my own creation. It could have absorbed my magic to protect me, but instead, as I had commanded, it shot the very power back at me. It all seemed to pass so slowly. I opened my arms for it and closed my eyes.
I felt it pierce my own heart and I almost staggered back but instead fell to my knees. My breath was caught in my throat. I couldn't breathe. Although Anna would have some time left, my body wouldn't. This level of ice could have frozen any human in an instant. As for me, the demon that was the spawn of the curse, I would have a few spare moments. I gathered what little strength was in me. I could feel the ice creeping throughout my body and, step after step, walked to my balcony. I would embrace my last sunrise.
"The sky's awake, so I'm awake, so we have to play!"
"Do you wanna build a snowman?"
"What did I ever do to you? Why do you shut me out?"
"For the first time in forever, I will be right here."
Tears ran down my face. I was never the big sister she needed me to be. She would never understand because she would never remember. "Oh, Anna… Oh, my darling sister… I wish I could have been strong enough for you..."
I took a final glance at the sunset and fell to my knees one last time. In a sudden pain that had overtaken my body, I let out a yell that I didn't know was left in me. My hands to my chest, I closed my eyes and allowed the cold to chill over me. A single tear trailed my face, frozen to eternity.
In the morning, Arendelle would be free. The snow would subside at last. Anna would find that the white strip in her hair would have faded. The magic that had cursed her, cursed them all, would no longer exist. If they ventured back to the ice castle, a lone, frozen body would be found at the balcony's edge, for she had sacrificed her heart to save them.