AN: Hiya! This story is not in sync with the CCS plot. No magic, no sexy yue, and no flying teddy bears. It's only focus is the romance and confusion between Sakura and Syaoran. Please read and review.

Disclaimer: I don't own CCS. It belongs to clamp.

Come What May

Ch.1 Unbearable Truth

Sakura sat on that one particular park bench, with the paint all faded and one of the legs slightly shaky. But, she liked it because it had been there her whole life. It was something that couldn't be taken away. She sat there now, slowly sipping her lukewarm coffee. She always preferred this place on nice tranquil days instead of the usual coffee shop. She wouldn't be interrupted here and could get to think of him as much as she liked.

Yukito. He had been her love since the 4th grade and how desperately she wished he would look her way. Nonetheless, she was back again, dreaming about her future with none of reality in sight. It was sad really.

And she sat being bored, reminiscing on her past childhood and how when high school suddenly came around, everything had crashed. Touya left home after he graduated and was now in Tokyo, along with Yukito, trying hard in college. Tomoyo moved with her mother after she had found a new job. Periodically she sent dresses back for special occasions, and visited during the holidays. There was some good news, and that was that in just a few weeks Tomoyo would actually be able to move out of her mom's house and come back to Tomoeda permanently. So yes, Tomoyo would be back soon, but that didn't change anything really.

Sakura felt alone, but it wasn't the first time in her life. Absently she played with bits of her shoulder length auburn hair and twisted it over and over again with her fingers. She had even grown out her hair to as long as her upper back, until it got unbearably hot during the summer and became a nuisance. Touya commented that although she sported the short hair cut once again, it didn't change the fact that she had blossomed into a lady. Sakura smiled gratefully at her brother and her eyes captured the feeling of warmth that showed within his orbs. That was her 16th birthday. And not soon after, her father died.

Sakura pushed the thoughts of her deceased father away. She was done mourning but would always keep such a kind and gentle man within her heart. She sighed quietly as her eyes focused on a distant figure and recognition hit her rather annoyingly.

Li Syaoran. The ultimate bastard of Tomoeda High. As she suspected, a girl walked beside his, and he had his arms slung casually around her shoulders as they pranced towards the other side of the park. Sakura watched disgustedly as he kissed her his hand inching up her waist and resting back down on her hip. The girl pressed herself to him willingly and Sakura forced herself not to stare in details as they continued.

Her thoughts drifted back to her father. When he had passed away, he left her with a large and empty house. She was accepting the cruel fate of losing the man whom she loved so much, and having to cope with it by herself. She ended up managing it by busying herself with schoolwork. Then, soon after Touya started having trouble sending money back, she understood that no one was going to take care of her anymore. She had to get a job herself and make her own living, even though she was still a student.

She had tried, honestly, to get a job. But it was hard because of her limited hours and skills. She figured out in the end, she couldn't apply for anything beyond a restaurant job. However, that left her with practically no time to do her homework and no weekends. She couldn't give up those things just yet. She coveted to live like a normal girl, and even with her troubles, her smile didn't leave her face. Her friends rarely saw her in despair because her strength made it possible to hide it from them. Sakura continued to radiant warmth to the people around her no matter how much she ached inside.

She lifted her head and stared off into the sun, letting the dying rays temporary blind her. It was close to dusk, and the sun shed its bright gold color for a flaming red blush. A slow fire raged through the clouds and carried itself farther and farther away from Sakura. She shifted her gaze once again and it landed unfortunately on Li and his current woman. Their kiss seemed to be never ending and Syaoran clearly enjoyed sticking his tongue down her throat very much. Sakura snorted and got up.

Well that just ruined her afternoon.

There was a point when she almost... loved Syaoran. It was now considered a temporary lapse of insanity. He wasn't who she had imagined, and she would never forgive him for the things that he did. She did not want to put her heart on the line like that, only to have him step on it and smash it to the ground beneath his feet. He was a player, one who did not understand love. And she hoped that he would always remain lonely and miserable, accompanied by those lowly girls who are only after his money and authority. He may be smart, but he wastes all of his talents by locking himself up in that mansion, holding parties that stop at dawn, while drinking and indulging in his so called 'fun.'

Sakura hated that life. She hated him for changing and becoming a part of that society. She didn't know where the sweet, quiet Syaoran went. She didn't care about finding out either. For now, the two kept their distance at school, occasionally trading off insults and cruel pranks. Sakura knew that she was being immature when lured by his tempting nature to just smack his face in. Currently, it happened more and more often until she became afraid she was losing her mind.

She blocked Syaoran Li from her mind and concentrated on the lines of the sidewalk beneath her feet. It reminded her of a stupid saying. 'Step on a crack and break your mother's back.' Unconsciously she had been avoiding to step on a crack for some time now.

"But my mom's dead already." She said to no one in particular and stopped staring at the cement sidewalk.

The walk home did not torture her like it did on some days. The sun had finally began to set, painting Tomoeda's sky with darker arrays of oranges and reds. If Tomoyo or Chiharu had been around, she would have smiled brightly to show them that she was ok and full of hope. But they weren't around today, so she allowed herself to pull a stoic face and get on with it. Her house, the large and empty one, came into view after one last corner. The only one that greeted her was Kero, her large, almost lion-like dog.

"Hey boy." She whispered, petting his fur between his ears.

He purred and then jumped up to lick her face. This caused Sakura to giggle slightly as she took off her shoes and went to the kitchen. A red light flashed off of her answering machine and she pressed the button dejectedly before even turning the light on.

"You have one new message."

Beep.

"Hey Sakura, it's oni-chan. How are you doing? Hope you're not causing trouble when I'm not there. Listen squirt, I'm sorry but I just can't send any money back this month. Nakuru's birthday is coming and I have to get her something real nice. Just take some more money out of dad's savings and you'll be fine. Don't spend it all! Anyways, oh here's Yukito, he wants to talk to you."

Sakura's face lit up and she turned around facing the answering machine fully, as if she could see Yukito's face, talking to her.

His voice came on the line, and unknowingly Sakura was smiling.

"Hey Touya, can you leave the room. I gotta tell her something." Yukito sounded distant and Sakura guessed he was probably not to the phone yet and was telling Touya to leave in the background.

She could hear the door open and a jingle of keys.

"I'll be back around 8." She heard Touya say in the background and concluded he was probably already out in the hall."

"Ok, now then," Yukito's voice came back, loud and clear. "How are you doing Sakura? Me, I'm fine. This is kind of awkward saying it to your answering machine, but I guess maybe it's easier."

Sakura's stomach turned. What was Yukito trying to tell her? It couldn't have been good… She held her breath and she leaned closer to the machine, straining her ears to hear what he was saying.

"Well month or so, I met this girl. She's... well, the same age as I am and she's very intellectual. And I know that, it might hurt you if you heard it from someone else so I'm trying to be an adult and tell you myself."

Unknowingly, Sakura bit her lip, hard.

"I know that well… you still have that crush on me. And Sakura I love you, I really do, like my own little sister. But you see, you are just my... little sister. I can talk to you about anything, and I can act natural and joke around with you."

What's the point?

"But Yumi.. she's different. She intrigues me, before I knew it, all I could think about was her, and how I could make her think of me like the way you think of me. And I know this is selfish, but she's coming back with me to Tomoeda soon, you guys will be acquainted and I don't want.. well you know what I mean."

The realization hit her head on, and tears were running like silent streams down Sakura's cheeks. She bit her lip from making any noise so that she could hear Yukito continue.

"I know you'll grow up and mature and turn into a lovely young woman. And I'll probably slap myself then for doing this to you, but Sakura, you'll always be the little girl that I protect with my life. I love you, just not like that. I hope you'll forgive me…"

Sakura silently nodded along with the machine, and she could tell how difficult it was for Yukito to be saying this to her. However, that didn't stop her heart from crumbling into a million pieces and she continued to listen.

"So I'll be coming back soon. And I know that you're lonely and all, so maybe if you allowed, all of us will stay at your house and you know, it'll be like old times. Except Yumi will be there and I'm sure if you just got to know her, you would like her very much."

Sakura clenched her fists and finally bit into one of them from whimpering.

"I guess that's all. If you hate me for this, I understand. But I thought it would be unfair to keep giving you hope and then suddenly have me bring this girl home. And Sakura, I really do love her too, as much as I love you like my little sister. I know you won't hurt her, you'll be kind to her like you've been kind to everyone else. Um.. so I guess, bye."

Click.

"Sunday 3:46 pm. End of messages."

Beep.

Silence.

Sakura stood in the dark, one fist in her mouth, crying silently. She made a choking sound, then slid slowing along the cabinets and sat finally on the cold floor. Bringing her knees up to her chest, she wrapped her arms around her legs and buried her face in them. Then, she began sobbing. Her breathing came in hiccups and she just let the tears flow freely, wetting the hems of her sleeves. Kero came up beside her, nudging his owner gently, but Sakura ignored him.

A messy jumble of thoughts ran through her head, echoing one after the other.

I met this girl… Yeah Yukito, like every other one you tell me about.

I love you, like my little sister…. I know that, but maybe you'll change your mind one day.

Little sister… I don't want to be your little sister!

I love her, I really do…. No, no! Don't tell me that!

She intrigues me… Maybe I would too, if you ever looked at me.

You'll be the little girl I always protect… I don't need you to protect me. I just want you to love me!

Little girl… Just because I haven't had sex? Because I can't drink or haven't gone clubbing?

I know you won't hurt her.. Of course, I couldn't. It would make you unhappy.

If you allowed, we could all come stay at your house… Sure, if that's what you want. Even though it will tear me apart.

If you hate me for this, I understand… Oh Yukito, how can I hate you? You know I won't.

Paralyzed with the sudden trainwreck that crashed into her head, she quickly made a grab for her keys and ran out into the cold night.

Next Chapter: Where is Sakura going? Who will she run into? What will they do! Lol, this sounds very… eh… So anyways, Sakura will definitely run into the 'bastard' or the story. But, I'll leave what they do a secret. .- So the title of the next chapter will be : A Night of Regret.