Hallmark Moment 103, a stargate: sg-1 fanfic

Title: Hallmark Moment # 103 - Jack and Daniel are at it again.

Author: HailDorothy aka HDorothy

Category: Humor

Warning: one swear word - another word for buttocks

Pairing: SG-1 S/J hinted.

Season: Any after S3

Spoilers: None

Rating: K

Summary: During a team briefing, Sam's bored and Jack comes to her rescue with a Hallmark moment . . .His version of another Jack and Daniel mental strain.

Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended.

SGC Briefing Room:

Man, oh, man, she loved to watch him. She knew every wink, smirk, twitch, smile, frown, eye roll, and brow waggle. She understood his sniffs, sighs, snorts, groans, grunts, occasional growls, laughter and lame jokes. Moreover, when he scrubbed his hands over his lean face and into his short gray hair she knew he was on the verge of losing it. Major Samantha Carter knew her CO better than she knew herself. A scary thought when one thought too long on it.

Today was a typical briefing with her team. She'd spoken first. Now Daniel stood at the wide screen monitor, talking, and using abstract hand gestures as he explained his newest archeological find on PX2 479. Watching Daniel direct traffic with his hands, Sam concluded he'd spent way too much with Jack.

Meanwhile, Teal'c sat across from her, doing what he did best. Nothing. She often wondered what he thought during these daily briefs, at least the ones that didn't involve military hardware, combat strategy, or outwitting the Goa'uld.

Only ten minutes into the meeting, General Hammond had been called away, which left the three of them at the table. Sam hated to admit it but she was bored. Not that she didn't take interest in Daniel's scientific report but found it difficult to stay focused today. What she wouldn't give for what she and the colonel called their, 'Hallmark moments.'

At her side ahead of her, the colonel sat on an angle that allowed her full view of him. He did this on purpose, although some days their roles were reversed and he took perverse enjoyment watching her. Worse he'd sit across from her, which put her at his mercy, or so he thought. Sam smirked.

Despite what most of the SGC personal and scientists assumed, Jack O'Neill was a sharper tack than he let on. Sam had long realized his, 'oh duh expressions and remarks,' were smoke screen from his Black Ops days. Which worked to his advantage. Intellect aside, Jack did bore easily. If not a hands-on subject that he could apply to the field or an immediate situation, he didn't care. That didn't mean he didn't comprehend the basics or put it to memory.

Three cups of coffee later the glazed look had settle over his rugged features followed by an audible grunt, as Daniel inserted more than one three syllable word into a sentence. Arabic no less. Yep, he was now three fries short of a Happy Meal. Not good. When Jack's forehead hit the table with a loud thump, his deflated response didn't go unnoticed by their enthusiastic speaker.

"Um, Jack?"

Her CO lifted his head a notch. "Yes, Daniel," his tone was polite as he tapped his pen against the table and stared off into space.

"Would you repeat what I just said?"

Sam snickered silently. Oh, this should be good.

Across from her, Teal'c arched a brow that said, indeed to her mental remark.

"Is that necessary?" Jack slouched deeper into his chair, yawned and looked at the linguist with the attention span of a three-year old.

Having a Jack moment Daniel groused, "Yeah, Jack, I think it is!"

"Why?" he arched a dark gray brow and began to disassemble his pen, adding another insult to Daniel's self-esteem.

Man, she wished she had a diet soda and buttered popcorn. At least she had a ringside seat.

At the far end of the table Daniel leaned over and said in his pissed off voice, "Because I go to a lot of work to explain these translations on a level that you can comprehend."

Ow!

"And I appreciate it, Daniel." Her CO gave his charm the pants off a Goa'uld smile.

"You do?" Daniel appeared to have calmed.

"Yes, I do. Just because it looks like I'm not listening or understanding your mission report, doesn't mean I am." He sat upright and set the dismantled pen pieces according to size on the table, before looking up at Daniel.

"It doesn't?"

"It does." Jack corrected pleasantly, squeezing the pen's spring between his thumb and forefinger with the intent of a calculating child, nope, brat came to Sam's mind. Must keep those lean fingers in shape, she mused.

"Oh, yeah . . . sure . . . I see." Daniel scratched the back of his head with an 'oh duh' look, before he nodded and returned to his presentation.

Teal'c turned his head before revealing his understated grin.

Sucking down laughter, Sam almost lost it. Jack's elbow to her ribs didn't help. Daniel had just been hoodwinked by his best buddy. That didn't mean Daniel wouldn't figure it out . . .

Soon.

He always did.

She glanced at her watch and began a countdown as she said softly into her CO's ear, "You're so evil, sir."

"Yep. Love our Hallmark moments, Carter," he whispered maintaining his poker face.

"Me too."

Jack smiled at Teal'c, whose copious lips twitched.

At the exact moment Daniel Jackson figured it out the spring took flight and nailed him between the brows.

"Jack!" Daniel bellowed and glowered like a Goa'uld.

"Yeah, Space Monkey?"

"You're an ass!"

"Ya think?"

The end—or not