AN: This did not turn out at all how I wanted it to. I'm probably going to scrap it and start over, but until then you can have a peek. I apologize now because I warn you, this is terrible.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Feelings Through the Fog
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In the end it was probably better he didn't remember.
Even now, after the wipe, he would feel guilt at strange times. When Butler got winded going up the stairs, when his manservant looked at him in the eyes and suddenly seemed older than he could possibly be. This always caused Artemis pause.
He had always despised guilt. To feel guilt was a weakness, one he had never experienced. But sometimes he'd feel a stab that would leave him shaken and wondering; was it somehow his fault? He would always shake his head and put the thought out of his mind. How could it possibly be?
But if they had left his memories the guilt would have been stronger. It quite possibly would have consumed him. If he remembered the events that took place, and that the blame for the damage done was his alone, it would have caused him great pain.
Guilt was a powerful feeling capable of consuming even the strongest of men. To have never experienced its grip then feel it so crushingly strong was enough to crack even the toughest of shells. Guilt had destroyed many great men, but he would not be one of them.
There is a moment in every man's life when he has the sudden epiphany he is not invincible.
Artemis Fowl the Second's almost cost him the life of his most trusted ally and bodyguard. One of the few people to whom he had given his respect.
Surely if he remembered he would be a changed man.
To have blood on his hands so young was terrible shame.
For it to be the blood of a friend was a tragedy.
There were lessons learned that would have to be taught again.
But perhaps it was best he didn't remember.
Disclaimer: Not mine.
Feelings Through the Fog
-----------
In the end it was probably better he didn't remember.
Even now, after the wipe, he would feel guilt at strange times. When Butler got winded going up the stairs, when his manservant looked at him in the eyes and suddenly seemed older than he could possibly be. This always caused Artemis pause.
He had always despised guilt. To feel guilt was a weakness, one he had never experienced. But sometimes he'd feel a stab that would leave him shaken and wondering; was it somehow his fault? He would always shake his head and put the thought out of his mind. How could it possibly be?
But if they had left his memories the guilt would have been stronger. It quite possibly would have consumed him. If he remembered the events that took place, and that the blame for the damage done was his alone, it would have caused him great pain.
Guilt was a powerful feeling capable of consuming even the strongest of men. To have never experienced its grip then feel it so crushingly strong was enough to crack even the toughest of shells. Guilt had destroyed many great men, but he would not be one of them.
There is a moment in every man's life when he has the sudden epiphany he is not invincible.
Artemis Fowl the Second's almost cost him the life of his most trusted ally and bodyguard. One of the few people to whom he had given his respect.
Surely if he remembered he would be a changed man.
To have blood on his hands so young was terrible shame.
For it to be the blood of a friend was a tragedy.
There were lessons learned that would have to be taught again.
But perhaps it was best he didn't remember.