Mr. & Mrs. Morgan
Yeah... you know… couples from all over the world come to Whitechapel. you wanna know where they go when they get here? They come to ME! They seek my help... my guidance...
why?— I'm just the best at what I do...
they call me… the Marriage Counselor….
"Now, Mrs. Morgan, we're going to have to talk about this, sooner or later…" –the Morgan's were regulars at my office. "There's nothing to talk about, he TRIED to KILL me!" cries the woman…
"This is absurd!" –the gentlemen is very defensive.
"Woa... you tried to kill your girlfriend?" "—hold on now, wait a minute... I did not try to kill my girlfriend—" "Yes he did!" They're eyes fall on me. "What..? You know what... let's try this, lemme tell you guys about my day, and then you tell me about yours..." "That sounds good with me!" declares the male. The lady simply scoffs and rolls her eyes. "—She's over exaggerating..." the gentlemen whispers. "Over exaggerating!?" Says the lady. "Yes, over exaggerating..." "Hey! can we avoid the yelling, now people?" "Whatever" says the lady.
"Alright... so, I want you two to sit there, and think about the kind of day I'm having... I get a call... on my cell... and it's my assistant. You wanna know what she says to me? This is what she says to me... —'the morgan's are coming...(—They both stop and blink at me. " "The Morgan's are coming... now how do you think that makes me feel... eh?"
The gentleman and the lady exchange awkward glances. "—Um... I'm not too sure... what to say... to that..." says he.
"–You're lying, Ethan!"
"No I'm not!.."
"Yes you are! She can't stand having us clients 'cause you're always whining about something!"
"I-I'm Whining?"
"That's what i sed!"
—boy i wish that i could roll my eyes like that... "You do whine a lot, Mr. Morgan" I say.
"—Jane… oh, I see how this is about to go!.. CAHOOTS" he declares. "—see, there he goes again!" the lady tosses the abrasive behavior to the wind.
"Yeah, whatever you sneaky little munchins... Call me crazy... I don't care..."
(—HUUUH!)
"Did you just hear him!?" the lady cries out to me. "Yes I did, girl."
"You see what I mean? be careful... you can't trust him!" It seems as if the lady and I are developing some sort of... bond. "Hey! Jane! Over here… look, you can trust me… okay? It's me… Ethan, your big brother… please don't let the crazy woman get me… don't let her win… c'mon Jane… family over everybody, right?"
"Crazy woman?" says Mrs. Morgan. —did he say... crazy woman?" "—em`hm" i nod.
she reaches over and plucks a loose thread off the gentleman's suit. "OUCH!"
"—Jane!.. she hit me! Doesn't she lose points or something!?"
"Don't be silly Mr. Morgan, there are no points in Couple's Therapy…" HAHA! For some reason, it felt good saying that…
"You see, clueless. what's new?!" accuses the lady.
"This is a conspiracy!" cries the gentleman.
"Please calm down Mr. Morgan – we can't have therapy with you in such a... rage."
Mr. Morgan sighs.
"—Can I please just explain my side of the story... please?" "—no!" cries the lady. "Please?" "Don't let him do it, Jane!" she says. "—c'mon little sis..." he pleads. "—don't you dare..." What should I do? Ethan is my big brother… but Sarah's my new bestie now… which one of those come first, again?
"—Go ahead, Mr. Morgan… you may proceed…"
"—thank you, Jane..."
The lady didn' take kindly to my decision…
"—playtime with dollies... GONE!"
"—You see, I told you! Crazy woman… no no…" the gentleman teases.
"—please proceed with your story, Mr. Morgan."
"Look… I did not try to kill her. The optics on my rifle were misaligned… a simple mistake that—" "—he SHOT me with a stake!" accuses the lady.
"You shot you vampire-girlfriend… with a stake? Mr. Morgan. "—No! I didn't shoot her with a stake!—" "You shot at me with the stake!" "I-I… Well…" "Let me get this straight, Mr. Morgan…" I say. As the therapist, it's my job to get everyone thinking on the same page, that way, no one's ever feeling misunderstood.
"You SHOT, at your poor, defenseless, beautiful girlfriend. The love of your life for what's going on two months now… She's been your babysitter for over seven…"
"—wait a minute!.." cries he...
"No! you wait a minute, buck-o! You. Knowingly, and willingly, shot a deadly STAKE, at your vampire girlfriend… knowing that it could kill her? That's what happened, isn't!?"
"Yep! That's right, girl!" the lady encourages.
"—No! The stake gun misfired! It was a mistake!"
"—I'm sorry, but I don't see how I'm going to let you get away with this one, Big Brother!"
"—YES!" applauds the lady.
"—What!?"
"One point for SARAH!"
"Jane?! You said that there weren't any points in couple's therapy!—" cries a young, Ethan Morgan. What is this?" It seems as if we have a dilemma. I need to do something right away…
"—girls are allowed to get points."
"—What!? That's a load of crap, Jane!"
"—no it's not, Jane! Don't let him talk to you like that!
"—Mr. Morgan if you do not calm down, I will be forced to penalize you..."
"—this isn't fair!, you two are ganging up on me, I knew this was going to happen!"
"—whining again..." the lady says in her funniest tone.
"—we are girls, big brother, that is what we do…"
"SCREW THIS! I'm out of here!"
I watch my big brother as he stands up and storms out of my bedroom. "Ugh! He always quits when we play Couple's Therapy!.."
…my eyes fall on Sarah's…
"—can you make him come back?.."