"Look at me." The boy's familiar green eyes widened as the small black ones stared at him intensely. Then darkness closed in on Severus Snape.
It was cold. Not the kind of cold that froze things, but the kind that settled into your bones and made it almost impossible to get warm again. Severus opened his eyes and looked up. He was staring at nothing, lying flat on his back and his limbs felt like noodles. He slowly curled and uncurled his fingers before moving his head left and then right, testing his strength. How long had he been lying here? Severus blinked as he thought the question, then quickly discarded it for a more important one: Where exactly was here?
He raised his head, glancing around and out of habit reaching into the pocket of his robes for his wand. It was not there. Unperturbed, Severus sat up fully, then got to his feet. The cold had subsided to a mere chill, and his hands and feet had gone rather numb and tingly. Rubbing his hands together, the pale faced man looked all about him, seeing nothing… and then he spied a door.
It was white, with a huge golden knob, and appeared to be standing alone in the strange grey nothingness. Without hesitation, Severus grabbed the knob and opened the door. He half expected it to be locked, but instead he was met with a view of a playground that looked hauntingly familiar. A merry-go-round and a forlorn looking jungle gym glittered brilliantly in the sunshine. He blinked his eyes in the light, as a warm breeze hit him in the face. After the dankness of the grey place (as he had come to call it) it was very welcome.
"Hello, Severus, my boy." A familiar voice sent a spasm of shock though his body as he turned his gaze to a bench on the left of the playground and saw sitting there none other than Albus Dumbledore. "Headmaster." Severus nodded his head once and stepped away form the door, which closed with a slight clicking sound. He was not surprised to see the dead wizard here, after the strangeness of everything else.
"It is done then, I assume?" Severus said as he sat down next to Dumbledore. "I am dead, and this is the afterlife?" He looked around, not very impressed. Dumbledore chuckled, his blue eyes twinkling merrily.
"No, Master Snape… this is not the afterlife, this is an in-between place.. And you are not dead, only mostly so." He adjusted the spectacles on his nose and continued. "Do you know what this place is?" He asked. Severus though for a moment, looking around at the green grass and the forest trees a short distance away. His face grew impassive as a memory of laughter caught him suddenly like the breeze had.
"This is the playground where she and I used to-" He stopped mid-sentence, looking at the ground and not elaborating further. Dumbledore placed a hand on Severus' knee, patting it comfortingly.
"I am glad you remember. However, this is not the actual place… only a figment of what you would deem the world between the worlds to look like." He swept his arm wide. "This is your representation of it." Severus looked thoughtful for a moment as he pondered this. It was strange to think that his mind, so long submersed in the dark arts and the Dark Lord's doings could still conjure up so peaceful of a place.
"Am I to go on then?" He asked after another moment. Inside he was curious as to where he would possibly be sent to next. The old headmaster looked solemn as he stared at Severus, seeming to weigh him in.
"Would you like to die, Severus?"
The question came as a shock. He didn't think he had much choice in the matter. It had been done, hadn't it? But he voiced none of these questions, for only one word was able to escape his lips at this point. "No." Severus winced as he heard the sharpness in his tone. He hadn't meant to speak so abruptly. Dumbledore did not appear to notice however, as he sighed and then looked fondly at the merry-go-round. If Severus didn't know any better he would have thought the old man fancied having a go on the muggle contraption.
Dumbledore spoke. "You do not have to die, Severus. You can go back… no, not back to the present time I am afraid. It is much too late for that." Severus thought of his rather messy and somewhat embarrassing death. Indeed, how could one come back from that? Severus said nothing, but looked at Dumbledore and waited for him to continue.
Dumbledore looked at Severus, his twinkling blues eyes belying some mischief at foot. "No, you may not go back to the present, but you may go back to the past… what if you had the opportunity to change certain things in your life?" here Dumbledore looked sad. "You have been a tool. A finely sharpened double edged knife used by two masters until you had almost become dull. You've been robbed, Severus. For that I am so sorry."
Albus Dumbledore raised his hand and gripped Severus on the shoulder. It was almost in a fatherly way, and Severus felt tears come unbidden to his eyes. This man had been the closest to a real father he had ever known. Still, he said nothing. His thoughts were racing back and forth, guessing at what the wizard was saying but still not fully comprehending.
"You can go back… back to a time where you shall have the chance to right some wrongs in your own life, my boy. The cards are in your hands. Should you choose to return, you will have all the memories of this life, a full thirty eight years, and the sorrows that go with them. That I am afraid is your penalty. But you can use these memories to change things, if you should so wish." Dumbledore looked at Severus, waiting for his answer.
"I…" He paused a moment, wondering what he should do. Time stretched on. The breeze caressed his face and yet the sun stood still in the sky. He had no idea how long had passed before he finally gave his answer. "Yes. Yes I would like to go back… to have a chance to change things…" A memory flashed before him and Severus saw a stunning red head with emerald green eyes smiling at him. Lily. He turned to face Dumbledore, but the old man was gone. When he looked back at the playground, it had grown dimmer looking. The whole area looked as though a cloud had covered the sun, shading everything.
Severus felt his eyelids growing heavy. He tried to force them to stay open, but to no avail. Strangely, the last thing he saw before they closed the last time was Dumbledore sitting happily on the merry-go-round.