My Hero is You
Matt, why the hell did you fucking leave me here without me, and why the hell don't I have the damn guts to get it over with and join you? Matt, you were always there for me, willing to die for me, and for that you're my hero...
You know I try to be all that I can but there's a part of me I still don't understand why do I only see what I don't have? When my reality, its things are not that bad.
I remember this one time I was bitching to you about being second to Near, even though second wasn't that bad, you were third but you never complained.
Your faith has shown me that
"It's okay Mello, you'll get first next time, or the time after that, you're really smart way better than Near," you comforted me.
When my world goes crazy
"THEN WHY THE HELL AM I STILL SECOND?" I yelled at you insanely, my world felt upside down and backwards.
You won't let go
"Because not eating chocolate so long makes you not do as well, chocolate is brain food. For you anyway."
When the ground gets shaky
"CHOCOLATE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH IT!" I was going insane over nothing, I regret ever being mean to you.
You give me hope
"Whatever you say Mello, you'll get first next time, I swear, let's go play video games now or something."
When I try to push you away
"What the hell Matt? How am I ever supposed to beat Near if I play video games with you instead of study? Go away."
You never move.
"No, if you never take a break then your brains are gonna fall out and then you'll never beat Near."
I miss you more than anything, I miss your optimism and the way you put up with my mood swings, I'll never have a friend like you...
Now when I start doubting.
When I doubted myself
You help me see
You helped me up.
There's a strength, and a mind, and a power in me
"Mello you're the most amazing person I know. You've got a heart Near could only dream of having and you're a genius. Even if Near was smarter -which he's not- you'd be way better taking you as a whole, not just measuring your mind."
Oh believe me there ain't nothing I can't do
"Someday you'll be first because there isn't anything you can't do if you put your mind to it, your the most determined person I know." My determination was pointless, it couldn't save you from those guns, those horrible guns.
My hero is you
No matter how much you told me I was better than Near, I knew in my heart that you were the best person out of all of us.
I wish I wasn't so ignorant, you'd give up so much for me, I wish you hadn't, I took away so much, like your girlfriend.
I never saw the way you sacrificed.
"Linda's so fucking annoying, why the hell do you like her?" I bitched at you when I found out you were dating her. If I'd only known then...
Who knew the price you paid, how can I make it right?
You broke up with her, you told me grinning, I pretended not to notice the sadness in your eyes. I regret making you feel sad.
I know I've gotta try
I'll make it up to you somehow, I promise, when we're in heaven together, I'll let you have anything you want, I'll let you date anyone you like, even if you like Near... but I hope you don't.
I love you so much, Matt you're the best friend anyone could ever dream of having.
And I hope that you can see you're everything that I wanna be.
I wish I could've been like you, forgiving, selfless, patient, humble, loyal, unselfish. You told me I was amazing, but I never, in my wildest dreams could've been like you.
My hero is you
You're my hero Matt.
