The Great Disappointment

Ryou's POV

He yelled at me.

Joey yelled at me.

Told me what I feared for so long now. He confessed what Yugi could not.

He told me the truth, that they really did not want me around. What Yugi had told him only three weeks earlier.

He didn't even go into great detail about it. Just a simple

"We don't fucking want you around anymore Ryou."

And then he walked off.

Happily.

I knew there was something wrong. I knew that I was the cause of awkwardness whenever they tried to have a conversation. I must be boring.

Or ugly or embarrassing or something.

And this time it is not ok.

I am not ok. Have I ever been?

I wish I had never been born into this wretched world of back-stabbing selfish beings who want nothing more than to live with as many material items as possible.

That just doesn't seem like it is a correct way to live.

Im just defective. Everyone else seems to be able to get by just fine, with many friends and much happiness.

Maybe im just spoiled. I dont notice all the good that I have because I am too focused on what is desired.

I am sitting in my room, darkness covering everything.

Crying.

There truly is no one here to save me.

Im a disappointment.

I am useless.

I am useless I am useless.

It is only in dreams that I can be truly happy...

I can remember a place I used to go,

Chrysanthemums of white, they seemed so beautiful.

I can remember

I searched for the amaranth.

I'll just shut my eyes to see.

Oh how I smiled then, so near to the cherished ones.

I knew they would appear...saw not a single one.

oh how I smiled then, waiting so patiently

I'd make a wish and bleed.

While I waited, I was wasting away.

I can remember...dreamt then so vividly

soft creatures draped in white, light kissed gracing me.

I can remember when I first realized dreams were the only place to see them.

While I waited, I was wasting away.

Hope was wasting away.

Faith was Wasting away.

I was wasting away.

I never wanted this.

I always wanted to believe but from the start ive been deceived.

I never, never wanted this.

Inside a crumbling effigy, so dies all innocence.

But you promised me...