Disclaimer – I own nothing just my imagination Enjoy!

Warning - Yaoi

thoughts

speech

The brown haired youth drifted through the cold cheerless halls of Headquarters as silent as any ghost. In part he already was tonight's self-assigned mission is just physically ending a process that really begun when he first joined the survey corps or even further back when wall maria came tumbling down at the hands of the colossal titan . He glanced furtevly around making sure nobody could see what he had in his arms as carrying weapons in HQ was strictly prohibited but he needed a knife for this task and so he slunk his way down to the kitchens to take a knife from there only to find them locked. In desperation he had finally snuck in to Squad Leader Hanjii's Lab and took three bottles of highly dangerous acid that she used in her Titan experiments to test their regenerative abilities. He stole these along with a scalpel just incase cutting didn't work afterall he had to be 100% sure that he got this right. He finally reached his destination and pushed the door to the empty room open hoping that nobody had heard the slight creak the door made as he pushed it. He entered the room with purpose all the while thoughts tore away at his concious hungry wolves.

I am worthless and a monster. I shouldn't be allowed to pollute this world with my presence as all I do is cause heartache and pain and suffering to those who surround me. I cannot believe that I could hesitate and allow people to die knowing that they had more right to live and breathe on this planet than a monster like me. This is for th greater good nobody in the survey corps will need to watch their back from one of their own any more and Corprol Levi will be free to kill titans withought a shitty useless titan shifting monster like me. I hope this makes some sort of amends for the pain and suffering that my existance has caused and it means that I can be with my mother again though I do not deserve it.

The boy cuts through his flesh like butter with his stolen scalpel the wounds that he makes a physical manifestation of the hatred for himself that had infested his sould like a corruption that needs to be bled out him. It takes hours and hours of endlessly cutting and reopning wounds that close to fast for him to finally be able to make a lasting impression upon his own flesh and for his conciousness to slip away out of his grasp like sand through his fingers his last concious thought being

I Deserve this …Just like they tell me i'm a monster who should die...I hope this brings some happiness.

Unfortunatly for the brown haired boy his saviour has found him just in time and will save him despite his protests.

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