I hate you.
I love you. I hate you, hate you, hate you.
I despise you Near. Your perfection. Your lifelessness.
Everything about you. It drives me crazy. How are you number one?
Why aren't I?
You don't have emotion. You don't have life. What do you have that I don't?
So maybe I'm insane. But that's a matter of opinion.
Why do they think you are perfect? Why do they think you're the best?
How... why... there's so many questions.
But you see, Near, you know. You know that I hate you. You know that...
I want to kill you.
I lose my mind over you. I think of your blood streaming across your perfect pale skin, and I think of how beautiful of a scene it would be.
Maybe you could die in a pristine white room.
And every day after that I'd look down at my hands and know what killed you.
They'll lock me up in a mental institution, I know it. But hate drives us to do incredible things, doesn't it Near?
But you don't seem to understand. You don't think. All everyone sees is this white little genius with nothing to say about others.
You would never understand.
I feel. I can feel you bumping into me like the clumsy kid you are.
I can see you dragging a teddy bear behind you.
I hear you with those seemingly silent steps of yours.
I can tell when the teachers talk of your perfection.
And that, Near, is what drives me to thinking of your bloody death. It would all look so perfect. And you know why?
Because you would drive me to it. Everything about you dominates my thoughts.
It drives me insane, Near. Can you feel it?
You will one day. The day you'll finally learn to fear.
The day your white clothes turn red.
The day I may just as well kill both of us.
You're my obsession. And that's why I can't stop loving you, through my blind hate.
Why do you drive me to this Near? How, when you don't do anything?
You are just an addiction that I will never get rid of. I don't even think I want to.
Just like chocolate.
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AN- Well, here is a very angsty oneshot from Mello's POV.
Read and review, please?
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters.
