(A/N: HI READERS! AS YOU CAN SEE, I'M NOT DEAD YET :D. Just so we're clear, I haven't given up on ANY of my stories, and for my fellow anime lovers, you'll have to wait for those stories to be updated. See, I have this thing called an obsession, and one of my obsessions wound up leading me to watch Tangled, Brave, Wreck-It Ralph, Frozen, and How to Train Your Dragon 2 in one sitting... I do not reccommend this to ANYONE, by the way.
Thus, that somehow randomly led me to start this Frozen AU fanfic.
So, yeah. Rest assured, updates for my other stories are sure to come, but please enjoy whatever you wish until then.
TayZay out!)
(Kristoff's POV)
College isn't so bad. It's always had its perks. The parties I go to, the friends I make, and the classes I get to take are just a few of many.
One of them, however, isn't having a roommate. Usually, I'm stuck with some sex addict or a total burnout, but no. This year, I'm rooming with a ridiculously vain male model. Now, normally, I find myself shockingly tolerant with the cocky, self-loving type of douchebags. He, however, is the exception, and it's all because he's dating this really amazing girl who he doesn't even deserve to be with in the first place. It's really a shame that nobody else sees this to be true. Maybe if they did, then she would leave him.
God, who am I kidding? He's a freaking model. Of course she wouldn't leave him.
"Hey, Kristoff."
Speak of the devil... "What."
"Well, someone sounds like they got up on the wrong side of the bunkbed. What's up with you, grumpy pants?"
I don't even try to mask my disgust. "Don't talk to me like we're brothers, Hans."
He simply chuckles and responds with, "Believe me, Bjorgman, that's not even remotely close to the type of talking I do with my real brothers."
As if I cared either way. "What do you want?"
The redhead leans slightly to take a look at my reflection for a change. An abrupt laugh escapes his lips. "I just wanted to let you know that you look like shit this morning. May wanna get some more hours of sleep in before you grace the world with a face like that." Just as I'm about ready to show him how pissed off I really was, he adds, "Oh, wait, there's nothing you can do to cure ugly." He laughs even harder at his own joke.
I shove his face away from mine. "Fuck off."
"Oh, c'mon, Kris. You're not that bad-looking. You're just not me."
I glance back long enough to see Hans checking himself out in the mirror...again. Even though I hate him more than anyone else breathing on the planet, I can't help but agree with him on that last statement. He gets paid just for looking like...well, Hans. The only thing I get paid for is piercing and inking somebody's skin. While it's a pretty well-endowed job, it's nowhere near as impressive as his income. Still, it's not like I'm ever going to admit that to his face.
"Don't you have a class to go to?" Seriously.
His eyes never look away from his own reflection. "All of my hours are open for me, which means I get to go on a hot date with Anna tonight."
Jesus Christ, I wish this guy would just go freeze in a tundra. Why do we happen to have the same day off? And why does he constantly feel the need to tell me about his plans with her?
Coincidence? I think not!
"What about you, man? What're you up to for the day?" He finally glances my way, but only for a millisecond.
What does he care? It's not like knowing what I intend to do will improve or worsen his schedule. He seldom bothers to know about others and their lives, unless it involves him.
"Wait, don't tell me," he speaks up. "You'll be sticking around, watching Netflix by yourself, right?"
If he's not a dick, I sure as hell don't know who is.
"No," I growl back. "I'll be watching Netflix with my friends."
Hans has the nerve to snort, and even that doesn't sound ugly. "What friends? You mean that stupid reindeer of yours back home, whom you pay your poor grandmother to watch? How the hell does someone as broke as you manage to invest in a creature like that, anyways?"
His attention finally focuses back on none other than himself, so I don't bother responding to that. First off, I don't have a grandmother, let alone parents—biologically speaking, that is. I was adopted at a fairly young age and had been gifted with a reindeer, whom I named Sven. Second, he's no longer with me, but there's no point in telling that to someone who doesn't care. Lastly, setting up for the funeral didn't take a whole lot out of my bank account, anyways, considering I was the only ones who'd shown up. All of this being stated, everything Hans just said made no sense whatsoever.
Well, except for the friend part. When it comes to social life, I don't have much of one; therefore, I lied about watching Netflix with anybody. In fact, my original plans were to sleep in. As much as I hate to admit it, the guy was right. I woke up looking like a hot mess. There's no denying that. Besides, I'm a bit of an insomniac, so it's not as if it's entirely easy for me to get some shuteye at night. Again—it's not like he needs to know any of this, though.
There's a rather energetic knock on the door. As Hans gets up to answer it, I already know who it is. He swings open the big slab of wood and there, in the doorway, stands Anna. Her smile shines so bright that it's almost blinding. Her cheeks are tinted with a little bit of pink from the cold, but it actually winds up making her look cuter than she already is.
See, that's the thing that baffles me about their relationship. While Hans is movie-star hot (did I really just think that?), Anna is just as I described her—cute. Why doesn't he go for someone more of his caliber when it comes to physicality? Not that I'm minimizing her looks in any way, it's just something that's been boggling my mind for a while now. But, seriously, Hans can have any girl he wants, yet he chooses this sweet, innocent, naïve freshman...and for what? Ask me, I say that's the sickest shit a grown man could do, especially with a personality as hideous as his.
The thing is, Anna doesn't know the real Hans. She only sees what he wants her to, and even that's not enough. Remember what I said: this guy can have any girl he wants...just because he's dating Anna doesn't mean she's the only girl he's seeing.
I mean, technically, he's not seeing anyone else. He's trying to, but is failing miserably. The reason why is because the other woman is Anna's sister. I know the truth—Hans is merely dating Anna just to get at her sister. Really let this sink in, folks. You'll know it when you see it. Single men tell no lies.
Now, it's truly a miracle that this older sister of Anna's isn't practically falling at Hans' feet, but I certainly give her props for not doing just that.
"Hey, sweetie!" Hans chirps in that all-too cheerful tone of his.
"Hi," she replies and giggles as she gets on her tiptoes to kiss him. Ugh.
The egocentric model turns to the side so that I am in view of the young woman. "Anna, you've met my roommate Kristoff before, haven't you?"
She looks up at him before turning her focus onto me. "I have not." Her thousand-watt smile returns. "Hello."
"Hey," is all I can say in order to keep my cool.
Hans rolls his eyes so only I can see before he discreetly shoos his girlfriend out the door, following close behind her. I am left alone in the silent dorm shortly after.
(ENDING A/N: Dear readers... I sincerely apologize for the great amount of dialogue in the beginning. D: hope you enjoyed this first chapter anyways!)
