Setsuna turned her head slightly to the right, and regretted that simple
movement for the rest of the night.
Only out of the very corner of her eye did she see the three of them together. Serena, Rini, and Darien. Seeing them caused her to turn her head fully to the right and look at them. They stood together on the balcony, just outside the glass double doors. Setsuna supposed that they were gazing out at the river that ran by Michiru and Haruka's apartment building. The river looked very pretty at night, with all the lights from the buildings of Tokyo glimmering on it, the occasional party boat that would cruise by, all decked out with Christmas lights. The sight was very beautiful. Darien was holding Rini up, so she could see better, on his right side, and Serena leaned against his left. Everything was perfectly right with the situation, except everything was also completely wrong with it. She felt her eyes brim with tears.
With this thought, the scene became far too painful. Setsuna stood from her seat at the party and muttered a half-assed "excuse me" as she passed the others. She hoped no one would really notice she was gone, but nonetheless she felt Haruka's eyes on her. This caused her to quicken her pace toward the powder room, away from the party, away from her friends, and away from Darien, Serena, and Rini. Setsuna grabbed the brass doorknob to the restroom and pulled the door open. As soon as she pulled the door shut behind her, Setsuna Meioh dissolved into tears. She took a few steps toward the edge of the bathtub and sat down on it, wiping delicately at her eyes, afraid to smear her makeup. She tried to hold back choking sobs, but the pain in her heart was too great. Setsuna's heart ached terribly. In all her years, she had never felt pain so bad as the pain she felt now.
Setsuna had been living with a secret for a very long time. She did not dwell on it too much, but she did not simply forget about it, either. In another life, a future life, the secret was one that she and Darien shared. In this life, Setsuna carried the burden alone. She carried it well, though, for she rarely let the things that she knew bother her. Setsuna had come to this Christmas gathering at Michiru and Haruka's apartment with other thoughts, in fact. Thoughts that didn't have a thing to do with the secret. She had just happened to turn her head at the wrong time, and all the horrible thoughts and feelings that came with the secret flooded over her. Setsuna had been frozen in silence as the secret drummed full force in her mind with every beat of her heart, watching the future wife, future husband, and future daughter.
There was a soft knock at the door, and Setsuna managed to choke out, "coming!" and she stood and looked in the mirror. Her eyes were red-rimmed with crying, and her mascara had smudged, anyway, despite her meager efforts to prevent it. She put a hand to her face as a sort of shield and she opened the door. Haruka was standing there, hands in the pockets of her khakis, a mildly concerned look on her face.
"You all right, Suna?" Haruka asked, using her pet name for Setsuna.
"Yes, yes," Setsuna answered quickly, waving her free hand toward Haruka. "I'm fine."
Haruka looked at her skeptically. Setsuna's hand didn't hide the mascara tear lines very well. Haruka reached up and gently removed Setsuna's hand from her face. "Why are you crying?"
Setsuna fumbled for an answer and missed by a mile or two. She could feel more tears coming up fast, and all of the sudden she just wanted to be as far away from here as she could be. She saw Mina peek into the hallway from the other room and glance confusedly at the two of them, and then her face disappeared. Great, Setsuna thought, now everyone will know. Knowing the fact just added to Setsuna's frustration and she spat out, "I can't tell you!" and began to cry again. "Please," she sobbed, "I just need to go home."
Haruka looked at Setsuna, feeling quite sorry, but feeling even more perplexed. Here was Setsuna, who Haruka swore had been fine just a moment ago, standing in the hallway, crying her eyes out, and she couldn't tell anyone why. Setsuna looked like she needed a hug more than she needed to go home, but Haruka wasn't too good with comforting.
"Are you sure you can't calm down a bit and come back?" Haruka suggested. "I can just tell them you have a headache and wanted to lie down."
Setsuna looked at Haruka gratefully. "Would you?"
Haruka smiled. "Sure thing. You can just go back there to Michiru's bedroom." Haruka watched Setsuna go, wiping her eyes and trying to stop crying. She watched until Setsuna disappeared into Michiru's room, shutting the door gently. Haruka's dark blue gaze remained on the door a moment longer, then she turned to leave and she felt something hit her legs. She let out a little gasp of surprise and looked down.
"Chibiusa."
Little Chibiusa smiled a tiny bit, then looked past Haruka's legs to where Setsuna has just gone. She looked up at Haruka. "Haruka... why does Luna P cry?"
Haruka looked at Chibiusa for a moment, honestly perplexed. "Have you seen her this way before, Chibiusa?"
Chibiusa waited a moment, and then nodded, a nervous expression on her face. "Only when I'm with Darien and Bunny..."
Haruka turned her head around to look at the door to Michiru's room, and then back at Chibiusa. "Okay. She's fine. She just doesn't feel well." Haruka wasn't sure if the lie would pass over Chibiusa, but she seemed to buy it just fine. The two of them walked together, back to the party, Haruka with a more grim expression than she'd meant to have. Michiru looked up at Haruka curiously, hoping that she would look back and give her some kind of confirmation that Setsuna was all right, but Haruka just kept on walking. She went all the way to the balcony where Darien and Serena still stood together, watching the night. Setsuna loves watching the night, Haruka thought unconsciously. She reached up with a strong hand and pulled Darien by the shoulder. She pulled him down to her level (only a couple inches less) and whispered in his ear, "I think you need to talk to Setsuna."
Only out of the very corner of her eye did she see the three of them together. Serena, Rini, and Darien. Seeing them caused her to turn her head fully to the right and look at them. They stood together on the balcony, just outside the glass double doors. Setsuna supposed that they were gazing out at the river that ran by Michiru and Haruka's apartment building. The river looked very pretty at night, with all the lights from the buildings of Tokyo glimmering on it, the occasional party boat that would cruise by, all decked out with Christmas lights. The sight was very beautiful. Darien was holding Rini up, so she could see better, on his right side, and Serena leaned against his left. Everything was perfectly right with the situation, except everything was also completely wrong with it. She felt her eyes brim with tears.
With this thought, the scene became far too painful. Setsuna stood from her seat at the party and muttered a half-assed "excuse me" as she passed the others. She hoped no one would really notice she was gone, but nonetheless she felt Haruka's eyes on her. This caused her to quicken her pace toward the powder room, away from the party, away from her friends, and away from Darien, Serena, and Rini. Setsuna grabbed the brass doorknob to the restroom and pulled the door open. As soon as she pulled the door shut behind her, Setsuna Meioh dissolved into tears. She took a few steps toward the edge of the bathtub and sat down on it, wiping delicately at her eyes, afraid to smear her makeup. She tried to hold back choking sobs, but the pain in her heart was too great. Setsuna's heart ached terribly. In all her years, she had never felt pain so bad as the pain she felt now.
Setsuna had been living with a secret for a very long time. She did not dwell on it too much, but she did not simply forget about it, either. In another life, a future life, the secret was one that she and Darien shared. In this life, Setsuna carried the burden alone. She carried it well, though, for she rarely let the things that she knew bother her. Setsuna had come to this Christmas gathering at Michiru and Haruka's apartment with other thoughts, in fact. Thoughts that didn't have a thing to do with the secret. She had just happened to turn her head at the wrong time, and all the horrible thoughts and feelings that came with the secret flooded over her. Setsuna had been frozen in silence as the secret drummed full force in her mind with every beat of her heart, watching the future wife, future husband, and future daughter.
There was a soft knock at the door, and Setsuna managed to choke out, "coming!" and she stood and looked in the mirror. Her eyes were red-rimmed with crying, and her mascara had smudged, anyway, despite her meager efforts to prevent it. She put a hand to her face as a sort of shield and she opened the door. Haruka was standing there, hands in the pockets of her khakis, a mildly concerned look on her face.
"You all right, Suna?" Haruka asked, using her pet name for Setsuna.
"Yes, yes," Setsuna answered quickly, waving her free hand toward Haruka. "I'm fine."
Haruka looked at her skeptically. Setsuna's hand didn't hide the mascara tear lines very well. Haruka reached up and gently removed Setsuna's hand from her face. "Why are you crying?"
Setsuna fumbled for an answer and missed by a mile or two. She could feel more tears coming up fast, and all of the sudden she just wanted to be as far away from here as she could be. She saw Mina peek into the hallway from the other room and glance confusedly at the two of them, and then her face disappeared. Great, Setsuna thought, now everyone will know. Knowing the fact just added to Setsuna's frustration and she spat out, "I can't tell you!" and began to cry again. "Please," she sobbed, "I just need to go home."
Haruka looked at Setsuna, feeling quite sorry, but feeling even more perplexed. Here was Setsuna, who Haruka swore had been fine just a moment ago, standing in the hallway, crying her eyes out, and she couldn't tell anyone why. Setsuna looked like she needed a hug more than she needed to go home, but Haruka wasn't too good with comforting.
"Are you sure you can't calm down a bit and come back?" Haruka suggested. "I can just tell them you have a headache and wanted to lie down."
Setsuna looked at Haruka gratefully. "Would you?"
Haruka smiled. "Sure thing. You can just go back there to Michiru's bedroom." Haruka watched Setsuna go, wiping her eyes and trying to stop crying. She watched until Setsuna disappeared into Michiru's room, shutting the door gently. Haruka's dark blue gaze remained on the door a moment longer, then she turned to leave and she felt something hit her legs. She let out a little gasp of surprise and looked down.
"Chibiusa."
Little Chibiusa smiled a tiny bit, then looked past Haruka's legs to where Setsuna has just gone. She looked up at Haruka. "Haruka... why does Luna P cry?"
Haruka looked at Chibiusa for a moment, honestly perplexed. "Have you seen her this way before, Chibiusa?"
Chibiusa waited a moment, and then nodded, a nervous expression on her face. "Only when I'm with Darien and Bunny..."
Haruka turned her head around to look at the door to Michiru's room, and then back at Chibiusa. "Okay. She's fine. She just doesn't feel well." Haruka wasn't sure if the lie would pass over Chibiusa, but she seemed to buy it just fine. The two of them walked together, back to the party, Haruka with a more grim expression than she'd meant to have. Michiru looked up at Haruka curiously, hoping that she would look back and give her some kind of confirmation that Setsuna was all right, but Haruka just kept on walking. She went all the way to the balcony where Darien and Serena still stood together, watching the night. Setsuna loves watching the night, Haruka thought unconsciously. She reached up with a strong hand and pulled Darien by the shoulder. She pulled him down to her level (only a couple inches less) and whispered in his ear, "I think you need to talk to Setsuna."
