…I shut my eyes, shutting out the sight of Him, and when I open them all my thoughts and fears and doubts are changing, transforming into a rush of hatred so strong I forget my weaknesses, and I'm running, running towards the one person who can push me into wanting to do unthinkable things, force my hands into the fists that will mark him, make him see how powerful and strong I really can be. All sense of my surroundings have melted away into one pulsating ache to finally be able to act, to do what I should have done years ago as I push him to the floor and strike , strike that smirk off his face, punch and beat until I can feel the blood, his blood hitting my face and relish the cries of pain I am making him fee

SLAP!

…My head snaps to the left without my permission - fool, never take your eyes of Him, always give your him your full attention, you know that - and your back in the reality you regrettably live in, cowering in front of your beloved father, seeing the corner of his mouth slowing turning up, his eyes are staring deep in yours and its like he knows, he knows what you dream to do to him. He laughs that infuriatingly soft laugh and even though he is only a few inches taller than you, you feel yourself shrinking even more and in another horrible rush all the power you fleetingly felt is gone and your left, again, feeling empty, weak, betrayed by your own body as you bow your head, submitting just like the thousand other times before, because you know, you know you can't possibly win against him and all you can do is shut your eyes …