Gone
He tasted like menthol cigarettes and spearmint gum, and when he talked to me, that smile always lit up his eyes. He was mean, but the way he looked at me when we laid in bed after hot, passionate sex was the most wonderful feeling in the world. We were in love, willing to look past flaws that would be inexcusable in any other person. Like his snoring, or his incessant need to always be right, and it didn't matter what it was about..
His love was amazing. How he loved me, the little things he did.. His eyes, his hair, his laugh.. He was beautiful. And he was mine. He made my life worth living, and when he left, he ripped me to pieces. It was an accident, him leaving. He didn't chose to die, it just happened. He'd left his mark on the world, he'd left his mark on me. He was remembered, and that was all that mattered. He still lives in my heart, in the little things he said and the amazing way he held me when I was sad and scared..
His promises that things would always be darkest before the dawn are what give me hope now. His light guides me out of my depression, more now than it did before. He would kiss my scars and cry, begging me not to do it again.. he would say, "Sora, I love you. I love everything about you. Your scars are a part of you. They show your weakest moments, the ones you shared with me. But please, please don't make any more. Don't hurt your skin, don't kill yourself. You're the light of my life, I need you. And I wouldn't be able to call my life a success unless I helped you out of your dark places. Let me help you, love." He never saw a new scar after that. And he never will. Not because he's gone, but because I would never ruin his successful life by scarring myself again. If there is a better place, I know Riku is there, with his cigarettes and spearmint gum. Those will always be near me now, serving as a beautiful reminder of a beautiful man, one who gave me life, even when I couldn't return the favor.
He was an amazing person with a beautiful soul. He gave me life when I thought I didn't have it, he gave me love when I knew I didn't deserve it.. He ruined me for anyone else. I loved him with everything I had, and everything I am. His eyes will never shine again, his smile will never light up my heart.. His laugh will never make me happy, even when I feel like the world is against me. His love will never give me hope, will never warm my heart.. Our forever is over, and even though it'll never happen again, I know that someday I'll see him again. One day I'll feel his arms around me, I'll feel his love warming me to my very core. One day, I'll love again. Our forever will be just like it was, and when that day comes, nothing will take him away from me again.
XoXoX
AN: Okay, so I'm starting a new little side project, this series is just a collection of one shots based on sad, heartbreaking stories I come up with and get inspired to write. None of them will have a happy ending, and that's the only warning you'll get. I think I'm fairly good with writing sadness and loss, so be warned. If you have anything you'd like to read, please let me know. I'll write it if I can get inspired by it(:
