Everyone is familiar with the story of Edward and Bella. (This story takes place about forty years before Edward meets her). But, did you ever wonder what Edward's life was like before Bella came? Did Edward ever have another love? Did you ever ponder the reason behind Edward's protective nature of Bella? In this story, these questions will be answered and you will see what it was like before Bella entered Edward's life. I must warn you now; this story does not end on a very happy note. Remember, everyone who comes into your life has a purpose.
Love is never lost. If not reciprocated, it will flow back and soften and purify the heart. – Washington Irving
'Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. – Alfred Lord Tennyson
PrefaceI watched the horrific image that filled his mind after he released my hand. I sank down to my knees, my face crumpled in pain. "Please…" I begged him, but it was a wasted effort. He smiled an evil smirk down at me. "I'm a man who knows what he wants. Can you blame me?" his soothing voice laughed.
"Yes," I spat. With that, he turned and flew back toward the forest.
I needed to have her in my arms again.
Chapter 1: VisionsThe one day that I actually wanted to go to school was a day that I could not. The math teacher had assigned a test today and I really didn't want to make it up. Alice had predicted sun today, and what a surprise, here we were, trapped at home. I envied my family as I watched them curl up together. What a wonderful couple Alice and Jasper made. They each complimented the other perfectly and brought out great sides of each other. Rosalie and Emmett each had a quality about themselves that the other worshipped. But the relationship that I envied the most was Carlisle and Esme's. There was so much compassion and pure love in their relationship. I suppose this did have something to do with Carlisle's ability to care deeply and Esme's to love passionately. Still, why didn't I have that? I selfishly thought of how I wanted what each of them had. Another half, another person who loved you just as much as you loved them.
As if Alice could read my mind, she then looked up. "Edward, look." She showed me her vision of a pair of large, liquid gold, long lashed eyes. "Do you know her? I'm feeling some sort of déjà vu. I think I know her, but it's as if I'm looking through a murky curtain."
"What difference does it make?" I asked, irritated. I hated it when she bothered me with strange visions that had nothing to do with anything. "It's not like she's a threat or anything right?" By this time, the others perked up to try and figure out our somewhat silent conversation.
"That's the thing – I have no idea, but I have this strange urge to try and find her."
"What's going on?" interrupted Carlisle.
"Alice has an urge to go off and hunt down some vampire she doesn't even know," I explained, sarcastically.
"Alice?" Carlisle was now intently interested.
"I don't know Carlisle, I cant see clearly, its like trying to remember a…" she trailed off.
"A human memory""OH!" she gasped. She had remembered. "Her name is Matia. We met while we were both human. She and I lived together in a crazy person house that we were sent to. She could sense spirits and would talk to what appeared to be nothing. We ended up being great friends; both of us were thought to be crazy. A day before witch burning was ruled illegal; she was burnt at the stake. I would have been next but they sent me to that asylum. Of course, I never knew she had been changed…"
She then explained the girl's whole story to Carlisle. I couldn't see how Alice was just able to remember like that. Must be a crazy person thing. Haha, her term made me chuckle.
"Are you bringing her here then?" Carlisle's question yanked Alice out of her exploration of the past.
"I think so…but I don't know what brought it on," she then looked at me, realization on her face. "Edward," she said, "a word?"
We ran off into the woods. I didn't want anyone else eavesdropping on this conversation. I especially didn't want Esme to know understand how envious I felt toward the family; toward her. She would be so upset that I had never said anything. This, of course, would be the direction that mine and Alice's conversation would take. Once I decided that I wanted what they all had, a love of my own, Alice had seen the vision of this Matia. This made us both curious. Why had this girl showed up once I thought that?
"Okay, Edward. What's going on?" I guess there was no point to lie to her now. She would find out eventually.
"Well…" I began "I was thinking about how I don't have anyone. You have Jasper, then there's Em and Rose, and then Carlisle and Esme. But I have no one, Alice." I continued, "Then, all of a sudden, you have the vision of this girl and you have a pull to go and find her. What is that about?"
"Edward…maybe you are supposed to be with this girl. Did you ever think of that?"
"What? Are you implying that she is my soul mate? Alice, vampires don't even have souls…"
"NO! Don't you start with that "no soul" crap! Okay, what if she's not your soul mate, but maybe you would be good with her. She's very sweet, Edward. Please let me go find her so you can find out. You have been alone all your existence. Don't you think it's time to find someone? Oh wait of course you do… that's why I had the vision in the first place!"
"Alice," I started, "you will not force this. If it's meant to be, then let everything fall into place."
"Well you can't stop me from giving it a gentle little nudge." I closed my eyes and shook my head. Once you got Alice started, there was no way to stop her.
