I do not own Labyrinth or True Blood or any of the characters associated with either. I'm making no profit from this, just wasting some time instead of studying for finals. Also I would like to say that I love the character of Jareth and though I hate to bash him it's so true. Also if anyone that is is offended by this I apologize, however that's how the book put it and I musn't stray from the inspiration.
Jareth, the King of the Goblins was lounging in his throne with one leg thrown over the arm rest thinking of a certain defiant underage . Why did she have to be so difficult? It was obvious that she couldn't resist him...I mean who could. Conjuring a crystal, he was about to begin his ritualistic stalking when he was summoned to the aboveground. Sighing he transported himself to the source.
Eric Northman was in distress. Sookie had invited him to a party and he had nothing to wear! She had told him to dress as as possible, but he had forgotten to a human into doing the laundry. Besides he didn't have anything to suite the occasion. Suddenly he thought of a brilliant idea. Why not call his best man, Jareth? He always had a perfect outfit for everything and besides that man/ fae knows how to please the ladies. With a dramatic flourish Eric called out,
"Goblin King, Goblin King where ever you may be, come and make me look as as I can be."
Far away the goblins mumbled in a drunken stupor "Say your right words, vampire. Immortal or not why can't anybody get the words right!!!" The goblins then proceeded to drink more until they passed out completely and fell into dreams of chickens and more ale.
After about a minute of waiting Eric hissed in agitation and left the room murmuring, "I wish the Goblin King really would help me with an outfit for this party."
As soon as he stepped into his bedroom above the bar a barn owl flew through his window and in a whirlwind of glitter Jareth stood in his full Goblin King regalia.
"Why hello Eric! It's certainly been a while, last time I saw you, you were pilaging and plundering, " said Jareth with a slight smile of remembrence.
"Oh, I still plunder plenty," replied Eric with a smirk.
"Anyway the reason I called you was because there's this party and I need-"
"Well, well, well calling me for advice with the ladies. Such a pity, but you definitely called the right person," Jareth flashed his pointy teeth and took a seat on Erik's velvet lined coffin.
"I must say that if you want to get the laid the first thing you need to do is get rid of this coffin. I mean really being and all isn't exactly a turn on to most women. Plus there's hardly any room for rolling around in this thing. Though I've done it in a smaller place. Take for instance that time in-"
"Jareth!" Eric interrupted.
"Shut up, will you. I don't need dating advice I just didn't do my laundry this week and need something to wear to a party."
"Fine!" Jareth snapped. "But I still advise you to think about getting a actual bed. Now what kind of party is it?"
"An party," Eric smirked.
"Wow I'm impressed. You know I have just the right thing!" Jareth practically squealed. With a flick of the wrist and a poof of glitter and black smoke the pants were revealed.
They were turquoise and pink and absolutely the smallest pair of pants Eric had ever seen.
"Those are magnificent!!!" Eric lunged forward and grabbed the pants inspecting them closer. They were perfect, just as always Jareth had the perfect taste.
"Yes, they're too big on me but they'd probably fit you perfectly," Jareth replied coolly. "Well, go try them on! Don't just stand there drooling!"
Eric ran at vampire speed into the bathroom and emerged in record time. Jareth walked over to him and circled him like a predator would circle his prey.
"These fit like a glove...no better than a glove. I feel like I'm not even wearing pants!" Eric was screaming by the end of his ultimatum.
"Yes, they do give such a nice preview of your assets. I do believe your ready for that party," Jareth grinned wolfishly and disappearing in a glittery poof.
"Hellz yeah, party here I come!!!" Eric pumped his fist in the air and ran down to meet Sookie.
Well what do you think? If you want more say so because we have plenty! Coould become a series of one-shots...
