Seagulls squawked idly overhead, lazily circling around the clear blue sky in search of any food scraps some person on the docks happened to leave behind. The port town was bustling in the early afternoon with people passing by and happily chatting away in the calm summer day. The sun shone brightly and the breeze wisped pleasantly through the crowds while Donquixote Doflamingo was seated alone at a table with a full view of the expansive harbor. He sat boredly with his second Long Island Iced Tea within reach, watching the pedestrians from behind his signature purple sunglasses. The atmosphere was supposed to be that of just another simple Saturday, but to the brooding pirate the company was hardly appreciated. Even though no one bothered to stop and talk to him since his expression gave away a substantial amount of hostility he still wasn't a fan of those that strolled by. He continued to inadvertently catch tail-end tidbits of conversations that only served to annoy him with the petty details he occasionally picked up on.

The sixteen-year-old had the undeniable urge to dismember the next passerbyer who incessantly complained about their frivolous dinner party plans.

Doflamingo lifted his drink once more, taking a sip and reveling in the sensation of the alcohol raising his spirits ever so slightly. He then moved to set it down, deciding to act on his earlier decision when he heard a particularly annoying blond obnoxiously complaining about her latest party guests only to be interrupted when something touched his left hand. Doflamingo glanced down, ready to swat a fly from his knuckles when instead he found little fingers curiously grabbing at his. He frowned in confusion, watching as a little boy stood marveling at his hand and grasping his index finger like it was a plaything.

The kid had short and messy dark hair just starting to reach over the tops of his ears and big grey eyes. He wore light blue overalls with a yellow tee-shirt underneath and little black shoes which velcroed shut.

Doflamingo looked up briefly, wondering where the squirt had come from and why his moronic parents would allow their kid wander off on his own. The little boy made a coo of curiosity while inspecting what was in front of him, brushing his finger tips along the teenager's nails like he'd never seen something like them before. Of course, Doflamingo had just gotten them painted black the other day so it was possible the color was confusing the kid.

"Oi, brat. What do you think you're doing?" Doflamingo asked, still not moving his hand away from the armrest of the chair. The kid glanced up and smiled brightly just before uttering some indecipherable sentence then returning to his work. He stared down at the boy, watching as the toddler continued inspecting and momentarily caught himself internally remarking that the little guy was pretty darn cute. Doflamingo shook his head in order to dislodge himself from his thoughts and moved his hand much to the disappointment of the kid. The toddler pouted unhappily like he'd been denied dessert after dinner for not eating all of his vegetables.

"What?" Doflamingo asked, wondering why he didn't just turn around and ignore the brat.

"Aah!" The other replied, his mood suddenly shifting as he reached up with both hands to the teenager. Doflamingo frowned even deeper at the strange display.

"What the hell do you want?" He asked peevishly, ignoring the stares he was receiving from a few tables around.

"Aah, aah!" The kid called out again, opening and closing his hands like he was reaching for something he couldn't quite grasp. Doflamingo grumbled a few things under his breath and reached down, picking the kid up by the back straps of his overalls.

To the teenager's surprise, the kid cheered happily and let out a fit of giggles. The response prompted him to set the little one down on his lap where he sat contently, leaning against the leg Doflamingo had crossed over one knee.

"You're not the sharpest bulb in the tool chest, are you?" Doflamingo asked, knowing he wouldn't receive a coherent response in return. The kid then reached for his hand once more and Doflamingo compliantly held it out, letting the little boy stare at all of his nails before he moved it to brush his thumb along the younger's cheek. His skin was ridiculously soft and smooth and he couldn't help but run his thumb back and forth a few more times.

"You got a name, shorty?" The teenager asked, suddenly taking hold of the kid's chin with his thumb and index finger, swiveling his head from one side to the other. The little boy stared in confusion for a moment before laughing again and reaching up to take hold of Doflamingo's middle finger. His little fists could just barley cover the elder's second knuckle and he couldn't help but chuckle at that. Doflamingo finally set down the drink he'd forgotten was still in his grasp and used his now free hand to trace his thumb along the little boy's jaw and down his neck. The kid immediately scrunched up his shoulders, tilting his head towards the roaming fingers as a result. The teenager grinned mischievously.

"Oh? You're ticklish too?" He asked just before using his fingers to paw at the space beneath the little boy's ear. He squirmed and giggled at the touch, releasing the teen's hand he'd originally been holding captive in order to try and push the other one away. But when Doflamingo was given his chance, he couldn't pass up the opportunity; he used his unoccupied fingers to poke and tickle the kid's unprotected sides, earning more shouts of laughter from the boy.

Doflamingo smiled wide, ceasing his attack all at once when it was obvious he'd won. But the kid didn't let his guard down, eyeing the hands with amusement and waiting for them to return for a second round. They did indeed come back, but instead of going for his tummy they went underneath his arms as Doflamingo lifted the little boy up into the air. The toddler called out in excitement just before he was lowered for a moment where Doflamingo lightly bopped the kid's forehead against his then tossed him straight into the air. He came back down with more shouts of laughter and the teenager repeated the action, sending him back up and watching as the little one fell into his hands once more.

He then sat the kid down on his lap again, facing him forward and bracing a hand against his tiny chest in order to hold the little boy against himself. Doflamingo placed his free hand on top of the younger's head just before using it to muss up the toddler's hair. The little boy called out in disapproval, trying to reach up and stop the attack only to be blocked by the hand the teenager was using to restrain him.

"What? You don't like this?" Doflamingo asked playfully, stopping only when the kid started kicking his feet wildly. He caught the chubby legs easily of course, securing them in one hand then lifting the little boy from where he was being held against his will and holding him up-side down. The toddler just laughed though like he'd never been in a compromising position to begin with and reached forward, grabbing for the other's hair until he noticed something much more interesting. Doflamingo frowned when his shades were lifted from his nose, watching as the kid stared at them in mystification.

The teenager grabbed the back of the little one's overall straps again, positioning him upright so they were facing each other then seated the kid on his lap. He easily snatched the glasses from the toddler's hands, earning a noise of protest until he slipped them over the younger's ears

The kid glanced around the docks in wonderment from seeing his entire world suddenly engulfed in purple. Doflamingo placed one of his elbows on the armrest of his chair, leaning his chin against his knuckles and giving the little boy a contemplative stare as he wondered what the child would do next. But when he wasn't given a response quick enough, he improvised.

Doflamingo sat up again and gingerly placed his hands on either side of the kid's head, using his thumbs to distort the toddler's features. Doflamingo watched in amusement as he scrunched the little boy's mouth to form an 'o' then stretch it out into a thin line. He did this over and over, chuckling louder every time since the more he did it the funnier it seemed.

But the kid had had enough and eventually pushed himself further on Doflamingo's lap until he could also reach the other's face. He grabbed the elder's cheeks, pushing and pulling at them much like Doflamingo was currently doing. The two were at it for a bit longer until the teenager ultimately gave in, leaning down to place a kiss on the toddler's forehead with a grin he just couldn't seem to hide.

Doflamingo released his hands from the sides of the little boy's face in order to wrap his arms around the kid, casually tracing a few of his fingers up and down the toddler's back. The little boy also threw his arms around the other's shoulders, relaxing completely with his legs dangling at Doflamingo's sides.

Doflamingo suddenly gave the toddler an odd stare, completely baffled at the events that transpired and again glancing around to see if he could find the kid's parents while he absentmindedly stroked his silky black hair.

Of course, he turned up with nothing. He was just beginning to consider the possibility that the kid was a stray or maybe even a beggar who'd robbed him blind while playing ups-a-daisy. But the fact that he could still feel the bundle of cash in his pocket told him otherwise and the glowering face that seemed to appear from no where now standing in front of the table told him he wasn't allowed to keep strays.

"What the hell are you doing?" Crocodile asked, glancing from the blond to the child currently using him as a pillow. Doflamingo could instantly feel the blush scatter across his nose, completely at a loss for what to do in this situation. Not to mention Crocodile wasn't helping with his condescending glare and disgruntled frown.

"...It's a long story." Doflamingo replied, awkwardly clearing his throat. The eldest just rolled his eyes while he set two trays down on the table.

"I honestly don't understand how people could ever be afraid of you." Crocodile remarked, picking up a pair of chopsticks after he positioned his meal in front of him.

"Jerk." Doflamingo muttered, sitting up and pulling his chair closer to the table. The kid perked up at the movement and new smell, turning and climbing to his knees as his mouth watered from how delicious the food in front of him looked. He quickly reached out to pick up a sliver of teriyaki chicken only to have his hand pushed aside.

"Don't even think about it, cheeky brat." Doflamingo said, using this moment to also take back his sunglasses. The little boy called out briefly in protest as he reached fruitlessly for the shades, his eyes filling with tears from being denied two things at once. The teenager stopped himself before he could take a bite of his lunch, panicking since the toddler looked about ready to cry. But it was too late; fat tears began streaming from the kids eyes, rolling over his cheeks as the occasional hiccup began wracking his tiny frame.

Doflamingo stared with large eyes at the display, nearly dropping the rice from the end of his chop sticks. He could handle whining and wailing sobs (violently and angrily, of course) but the choked hiccups along with the utter desolation in the little boy's expression had the teenager unable to comprehend what to do. He then glanced from one side to the other, hoping to find anything that would make the toddler stop but turned up with nothing.

Something suddenly moved at his side and Doflamingo nearly jumped until he realized it was just Crocodile.

"Calm down, both of you." The eldest stated in annoyance, kneeling down to the kid's height. He had his tray in one hand and his chop sticks in the other, offering a small bite from the inside of a pot sticker to the little boy. The kid noticed the food and sniveled pathetically until he was finally under control. He leaned forward and took the bite, chewing thoughtfully while he dried his eyes with his little fists.

"If you're going to handle tiny creatures you should at least know how to take care of them." Crocodile said, eating the rest of his pot sticker before offering the kid a small bit of rice next. He ate it happily, smiling once more. The eldest pirate then stood and returned to his seat, leaving Doflamingo with the little boy and when the kid glanced up expectantly the blond pirate only returned the look with a puzzled stare.

"Why don't you try sharing, Feathers?" Crocodile asked snarkily, earning an annoyed look from the other. Doflamingo decided to try mimicking what the dark haired man did, taking a heaping bit of rice from his tray before offering it to the boy.

"Are you trying to make him choke?" The man asked with an amused chuckle.

"What? I'm doing it just like you." The blond retorted bitterly, pulling back the offer of rice before the kid had a chance to take a bite.

"Brats as little as him can't scarf down mouthfuls of food, moron." Crocodile stated, watching as Doflamingo then made the lump smaller. When he was done he held up the bit of rice and waited for an approval but only received an eye roll as the elder shook his head at the other's lack of skills towards the younger generations. However, the little boy was much more approving and happily accepted the food without even choking.

"See?" Doflamingo stated with a haughty grin. "I can do it too."

Crocodile only gave minimal attention to the other's success, keeping the majority of his mind on the front lines of the newspaper he'd also brought to the table. "I'm so proud of you." He replied sarcastically which elicited an exasperated exhale from the other.

They sat in companionable silence for the time being with the only noises coming from the happy kid as the blond pirate continued to feed him.

"Hey, Crocodile?" Doflamingo suddenly spoke up, using his thumb to catch a stray grain of rice from the corner of the little boy's mouth.

"You can't keep him." The other brusquely stated. Doflamingo shot a glance towards the elder, frowning.

"You didn't even hear my question." He groused bitterly.

"Am I mistaken?" Crocodile retorted, continuing to idly skim through his newspaper. Doflamingo opened his mouth like he was about to reply with something heavily laced in sarcasm but stopped himself, wondering briefly if the other could read minds before speaking.

"Why not?" The blond asked, not even bothering to hide his intentions. That response gained him the attention he was looking for as Crocodile lowered his paper with an annoyed glare contorting his features.

"You've got to be joking." Crocodile said without an ounce of amusement in his tone. He waited a moment to see if the other pirate would take back his question but in the end he didn't. "Do you have any room in your pea sized brain for a speck of common sense? What the hell makes you think you're qualified to look after a child?" The elder questioned, setting his paper aside and folding his arms as he waited for what the other had to say in his defense.

"Well, I..." Doflamingo started, having to think over his qualifying features before he could reply.

"You what? You can feed him?" Crocodile began, scoffing since he knew the other was thinking of using that as a response. Doflamingo frowned, gathering this reason wasn't a valid answer given the other man's reaction.

"What's it to you?" He asked bitterly, offering another clump of rice to the little boy who accepted it happily.

"What the hell do you think? It's obvious you're incapable of being a parent and I have absolutely no desire to take care of the brat when you screw up." Crocodile retorted, glaring first at Doflamingo and then at the kid. But the youngest didn't even notice the disapproving stare and continued enjoying his meal.

"What makes you think I'd be so terrible?" Doflamingo questioned irritably, not pleased with being looked down on as if he were inferior. Crocodile scoffed like the answer was obvious.

"Are you serious right now?" He replied exasperatedly. When the other only continued giving him the same blank eyed stare he felt like throwing his tray at the blond's head.

"Do you have any experience with small children? Anything at all?" Crocodile began. Doflamingo paused for a moment but eventually thought of something to say.

"I held a baby once." He retorted, making it seem like that act made him the most qualified care taker in existence.

"Once?" Crocodile asked incredulously just before he erupted in laughter. Doflamingo then proceeded to blush from embarrassment, wondering what he said wrong this time.

"Yeah, and I didn't even drop her! I had to hold onto her for, like, a whole minute!" The blond pirate elaborated defensively, causing the elder to practically die from his hysterics.

"Once! And for a minute!" Crocodile repeated, shaking his head and wiping at the stray tears which had collected in the corners of his eyes. "You're so clueless it almost hurts to sit in your presence." The man continued, turning his attention back to his lunch since his side of the argument had obviously won.

"Would you fucking stop that? ! I try to do something and all you do is rant about how useless I am!" Doflamingo shot at the other, slamming his fist on the table and making the little boy in his lap jump from alarm. The kid let out a small noise of panic before hesitantly glancing up at the teenager with watery eyes and a distressed frown. Doflamingo was about to continue insulting the other pirate, but when he caught a glimpse of the toddler in his lap the condescending phrases lined up in his mind died on his tongue. He stared at the kid for a moment and Crocodile was surprised to see the blond slowly relax until he was no more worked up than before.

"Besides," the eldest started again as he picked idly at his lunch, "he probably already has people looking after him. Someone would notice his absence." He reasoned in a much more neutral tone. Doflamingo glanced up with a crestfallen expression, searching the other's face for even a shred of leeway. Of course, he turned up with nothing and just resumed his meal, sharing a bite every now and again with the toddler in his lap.

When the two finished they decided to stick around for another ten minutes just in case someone frantically showed up asking about a missing toddler on the loose, but no one came.

"Come on, Doflamingo." Crocodile urged, standing in an attempt to make the other move. "We're pirates, not babysitters and I won't hesitate to sail our ship off without you."

Doflamingo wanted to make a retort but his argument didn't even leave his thoughts when he realized the other had a point. Life on the sea wasn't suited for a little brat who could hardly even speak, let alone one who looked as well taken care of as this one. He exhaled deeply and stood with the kid in his arms but instead of heading off to the ship with him, Doflamingo turned back around and set him down in the chair. The little boy moved over to the arm rest and held onto it, looking up at the teenager with his big curious eyes. The blond pirate smirked, earning a smile from the kid as he ruffled his dark hair.

"Bye, kid." Doflamingo said just before he turned to join Crocodile and head back out to the open sea. The toddler stared in confusion, watching the two leave with a deepening frown on his expression. He called out a few quick sounds, wondering where they were going without him. The little boy then jumped up and down impatiently, making one final call before he resolved to stand still with tears brimming at his eyelashes. He stuck out his lower lip in a pout but held up his hands nonetheless in anticipation when Doflamingo came back, sweeping the toddler in his arms once more. The pirate hugged the little boy tight, feeling as two drops ran down his chest before he had a chance to catch them with his thumb. He grinned warmly, brushing back the kid's hair a few times as he turned and continued on his way down the docks to where Crocodile stood waiting. The eldest has his arms crossed and eyes narrowed, watching while the other passed without even a single glance to him.

"If you don't hurry up I won't hesitate to sail off without you." Doflamingo called over his shoulder. The elder pirate stood in his place a bit longer before he took a step, shaking his head with a disbelieving smirk at how impulsive the other pirate captain was.

~0~

AN: can we make an agreement that states for every person who asks me to write more for this story, they have to publish a fluffy doflaw fic of their own because i do enjoy writing, but i enjoy reading much more ;) not to mention furthering this plot isn't on my highest priority list...

not to mention if i do write more it'll probably turn into doflacroc
all yee non-shippers be warned e_e