Thank you so much Melissa for being my beta and my twinsie! Also Nikki for always supporting me and being one of my bff…I appreciate so much the fact that you were able to help me beta this little O/S… And to Amanda and Vero for pre-reading :) you guys are awesome!
Ok this is an idea I got after discussing dish duties with my friend, Luz, and since her birthday is coming and we have made fun of it…. Here you have it! Happy B-Day!
Edward Cullen A.K.A Dish Bitch
EPOV
I met Bella 3 years ago in the subway. We both lived in New York City, and driving your car or taking a cab in the middle of the city was a fucking bitch with all the traffic surrounding us, so most of the time I just took the subway or walked when I was going somewhere close to my house. That day I took the subway after finishing up at work and was on my way to meet my brother Emmett to grab a bite and drink a few beers . Then when the doors opened, I saw her.
Sweet baby Jesus she was hot! And happened to be looking for a seat to take. The one next to me was available, and I started praying for her to come sit right next to me.
Dear God, I think I've been a good man lately — no robbery, murders, or lying — so the only thing I'm asking you is to send that hot girl over here, so I can lust—I mean talk to her.
Maybe the guy upstairs was in a good mood because suddenly I heard, "Excuse me, is this seat taken?"
Damn she also had a hot voice! So I just answered, "No, you can sit here on me—I mean with me. Sorry I'm being a dork. Sit, please."
Not only was she hot, but also cool because she didn't hit me or leave me there, being all embarrassed. We actually started to talk. I learned she was headed to the same place to have lunch with her best friend, she was a psychologist, loved to cook, listen to music, travel, and spend time with her friends. She also liked that Twilight stuff and reading — she blushed when I asked her what she was reading right now — so I just shrugged and started talking more about our lives.
After that day, we started dating. I swear to God that she was perfect for me. She was hot, honest, smart — smartass too — had great values, and was not afraid of trying new stuff — if you know what I mean — so after dating for three years, we finally decided to take the next step and move together.
I love knowing that after work, I was going home to her. I felt like I was on cloud nine. We had adjusted very well to everything when it came to living together . . . Well, almost everything.
The fact was that I could help her with anything she wanted at home. I didn't mind doing some chores . . . but I hated doing dishes. Oh God, how much I hate it, even if we had a dish washer, I just don´t like doing it! And believe me, she knew this, and since she loved to tease me, it was the only thing I was allowed to help her with on weekdays. No matter how much I whined, complained, or pouted about it, I always did the dishes. And thanks to my "drama queen antics" as she called it, I was now the not so proud owner of the title of "Dish bitch" . First time I heard it I almost spilled my beer, especially because I was at the phone with my dear brother and it was the last thing I want someone to know about me.
So now every time I started whining, she bitch-faced me, and said, "What's wrong, my dish bitch? I cook, so you're in charge of the dishes. If you want me to do it, then you have to cook for me, ok?"
Since she was right and I was pussy-whipped, I just said, "Yes, hun."
That brought us to this day. Yes, today was her birthday, and since she had to work today and had to work tomorrow, we couldn't go out, but that didn't mean I couldn't surprise her. So, I called her best friend a couple of weeks ago, so she could help me plan this night. I learned how to make mash potatoes and some steaks, I bought her favorite wine, and I ordered something I knew she was going to love . . . and probably tease me forever for it, but who cared? I loved this woman.
It was seven p.m, and she had just arrived. She walked in the apartment, calling my name. "Edward? Where are you? What are you doing?" I heard her voice as she approached the dining room.
"In here, Bella. I'm waiting for you in here."
As she came into to view, she gasped and said, "Oh, Edward, you ordered dinner?" But then she saw the not so perfect mashed potatoes and asked, "Did you cook this? Oh my god! Look at you being Mr. Chef for my birthday. I love it and I love you, baby. Thanks."
We started having dinner — that turned out to be pretty yummy, if I may say so — and talked about our plans for the weekend. Then when dinner was over, she started trying to clean the table.
I stopped her. "Hey you, it's your birthday. I'm in charge of spoiling you for tonight and besides, I still have another surprise," I said while starting to take my jacket off. I unbuttoned my shirt really slowly, and I saw your face trying to decipher what the hell I was trying to do. Then I saw the way your eyes got wide right after you started laughing like crazy when you saw the t-shirt I ordered on internet. The one I was wearing under my shirt that said, "I AM THE KING OF THE DISH BITCHES."
You just kept laughing hysterically, and said, "Oh my God, oh my God! This is the best present ever. I can´t believe you did this."
And then almost passed your pants when I gave you the coupon I printed that read, "Redeem this coupon for one day of doing dishes to be performed without whining or complaining."
While she was laughing like crazy at me, I fell in love even more with her. She was the one woman I could be this silly with and, hopefully, she would be the only one ever.
So after redeeming on her coupon and being her dish bitch for the night . . . I was ready to be her bitch again . . . on our bed.
Happy Birthday Luz! Xoxo
