So I wanted to try and write a different kind of fanfic, though it will still be kinda dark.

I'll let you know that this fanfic will contain several triggers such as the mention of suicide, self-harm, rape, abuse, depression and things of that sort. So if you're triggered by any of those or similar then I'd advise you to not read this.

Add (MM): 21

Ara (YR): 21


There was an old apartment building near one of the main streets of the city. It had just four floors with few and fairly ample apartments, with french windows and a beautiful view to the surrounding parks. Along the same street was a convinience store, a coffee shop and a library among other sorts of small shops that made it a convenient location to live in. A subterranean train station was nearby too. On the last floor of the building were two contiguous apartments that had just been occupied by two college students, who hadn't bumped into each other despite having their moving almost at the same time. It was a quiet building, mostly inhabited by old couples or retired loners.

A young man dressed with a cream like colored sweater and a white dress shirt underneath came out of his apartment on the fourth floor of the building. He fixed the strap of his briefcase bag on his shoulder as he locked the door from the outside. The beats of electronic dance music resonating softly in the quiet corridor from the big headphones. At the same time, a young woman opened the door of the contiguous apartment, with a knitted black sweater that fell from one of her shoulders and simple jeans, a small stack of books in her hands. None of them looked at eachother, both keeping their heads down and gazing to the ground the whole time they shared the space in that narrow corridor. After they were gone the hallway stayed quiet for the rest of the day.

The lighting changed in that white space from a soft yellowish glow to a dark orange with the passing hours. Night came, and then only the young man made it back to the building, locking the door from the inside once he came in. The girl didn't appear until it was morning again, with the same clothes and the same stack of books in her hands. The same crestfallen mien. The boy came out, repeating the procedure of the previous morning. She started to register herself, first calmly and slowly, then frantically. Every pocket in her clothes. He locked his door. She started sobbing uncontrollably, supporting her head against the door.

The young man started walking away after glancing briefly in her direction from the corner of his eye. One, two, three steps before turning around and walking back to the pair of doors. A frown on his face.

"You are crying" he stated the obvious at the lack of ideas for things to say in a situation like that.

She limited herself to look at him for a moment. She decided to ignore the unhelpful comment as she closed her eyes again, letting the tears bath her reddened face.

He sighed. He would much likely regret what he was about to say.

"Why?" he asked, keeping his back straight. Not even attempting to get one step closer.

She kept sobbing and crying, unsuccessfully trying to keep it quiet. Often choking on her own tears. At least a couple of minutes passed with only the sound of her sorrow filling the corridor. He fidgeted impatiently, ready to leave if she were to take any longer to answer.

"I don't have my keys" she replied in a barely understandable way, her words muffled by the copious sobbing.

He raised an eyebrow. That couldn't possibly be a reason to cry, not like that. He sighed again, wanting to leave. But something was bugging him and he couldn't stand it. Falling silent, he limited to watch her cry for a few minutes, unable to think of anything to say.

"I need a shower" she spoke again, muttering with an almost inaudible voice that came out camouflaged by the crying. But he heard, and somehow he understood something. Even if it was impossible for him to know what had made her cry like that, he knew now that it wasn't just the lost keys. As much as he wanted to avoid any kind of contact and stay as far away as possible from this stranger, he wasn't the monster others enjoyed thinking he was. And it bothered him to the point of irritation.

Turning around, he took a couple of steps back to his door and grabbed the keys from his pocket, unlocking the door of his apartment again and holding it open.

"Go take a shower then" he said, he commanded with an angry voice that came out more aggressively than he'd wanted. He could always clean after she was done, he could even use rubber gloves this time. But the look she gave him didn't indicate she'd move any sooner. They were wide open, cloudy by the film of tears that made them shinier, awfully red. But mostly, it was an extremely mistrustful gaze. Yet another sigh escaped his lips. He just wanted to be done with this as soon as possible. "Look, I don't have the entire day to do this. If you want to take a shower so badly, then go ahead. If you don't then I guess you'll stay dirty forever and I'll be going about my own business" he snapped at her impatiently, his hand unconsciously playing with the doorknob.

The girl lowered her gaze for a moment, swallowing what was left of tears inside her throat. He pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and index finger, ready to give up on the ridiculous task he had gotten himself into. She finally moved after a few seconds of hesitation, to walk through the door he had opened for her.

"Excuse me" she said, going through the door frame.

"Yeah, yeah" he muttered. "The bathroom is at the end of that corridor, at your right. Don't take too long" he indicated her. He turned around after she had followed his instructions, wanting to leave and finally attend his classes. But he wouldn't be able to lock the door if he left now. He couldn't, he just couldn't.

She started scrubbing, scrubbing and scrubbing. The tempered water fell onto her body; the refreshing sensation of finally washing her skin was somehow relieving. But it wasn't enough. She kept scrubbing furiously, until the skin on her legs started to turn red, until small and multiple red dots appeared. She still felt dirty, no matter how much she tried to rip it off. It was despairing. Pure frustration filled her insides as the temperature of the water and the length of her shower started to flood the small bathroom with steam. He told her not to take long; she had to get out now. But she wasn't ready, she didn't feel ready yet.

When the girl finally forced herself to get out of the shower and get dressed again, she went into the living room. She was received by the morning sun rays filtering through the curtains, the soft light that bathed the room and smoothed every line and every edge, the smell of bitter coffee and recently made toasts flooding every corner. It felt delightful, a soothing sensation and a warm welcome. It was all those things and everything of that nature, to her. His apartment was extremely minimalistic, but it was unbelievably clean and tidy. And even if everything was plain white, from the walls to the furniture, the soft light that managed to enter through the curtains covered everything with amazing warmth. That's how she saw it.

She made it into the kitchen, following the enticing aroma of recently made breakfast. It somehow felt familiar, nostalgic. She found her neighbor there, accommodating slices of bread with melted butter on them neatly over two plates. Two cups of steamy coffee sitting over the kitchen table.

"I'm already late for class, so might as well take a proper breakfast. And you too, seeing that you just came back this morning, and you're already here..." he said, trailing off at the last part as a small grimace twisted his mouth. He set the plates with the toasts over the table and motioned briefly for her to take a sit. She complied obediently. The bread was completely soaked with the liquefied butter. It was such a simple thing to eat yet it looked so delicious and appetizing. It was just like the rest of his apartment; a breakfast made with precision.

They ate in silence, each of them too preoccupied with their own thoughts like to think about something to share. He ate methodically, biting onto the bread in such a way that after a couple of bites it was always leveled to an almost perfect square, sometimes intercalating with sips of coffee. She, on the other hand, couldn't help but finish her slices of bread before anything else, leaving the coffee for last.

"Thank you" she broke the silence with a soft yet firm voice. He had been nice enough to offer her what she needed the most that particular moment, even if his manners were off. She somehow felt good in there. It was a clean place. Pure.

"Just recover your keys" he blurted out before his lips met with the hot cup and the bitter liquid flooded his mouth. He said it like it was so simple. It made her shiver.

"I'll call the person in charge of the building for a new one" she replied, not even wanting to consider the option of recovering the ones she left behind. The last thing she wanted was to ask him for a favor, of all people. She didn't want to go back on her own accord.

The boy just shrugged his shoulders and finished the last gulp of his coffee. He then started to pick up the used dishes to wash them immediately, leaving her to her own musings. He dried them off with a clean cloth and put them back on their place right away. No wonder his apartment was so neatly organized.

"I am Ara" she spoke again, even when she was only facing his back.

"Add" he replied curtly, not even bothering to turn around. "And I need to go to my classes now, so you should leave" he added as he walked out of the kitchen and into the living room to pick up his briefcase bag, his headphones and his laptop. She followed him closely, mustering up all of her courage to make the most selfish request she had ever made. But she couldn't help it, she needed to. Just this time.

"Can I stay some more?" she asked, facing him. Staring directly into his eyes to try and convey the desperation in her request. Staying firm in her position, she didn't avert her eyes for a second, letting him examine her as much as he wanted.

"I have to go".

"I don't care".

"No".

"Please".

"I need to lock the door from outside".

"That's fine".

"Why?".

"Just...please".

She pleaded. And for the second time this morning, he gave up grudgingly. Even if it was beyond his comprehension how she managed to sound so convincing, or when he had became so easy to persuade. It was irritating.

"Fine. But don't touch anything. Just...just sit down somewhere and don't make a mess" he said, pinching the bridge of his nose. Then he left the apartment, and she heard the keys entering the key lock from outside. That was fine.

Just this time she wanted to be somewhere nice.


So, that was the first chapter.

Please leave me your comments and impressions!