All I have done is made details to go with the story. Credit for Story plot, characters, and the words in bold and some things that Len says, which are the lyrics, go to the song Nemesis of Ruined Kingdom by Hitoshizuku. Translations by Coleena Wu.
Nemesis of the Ruined Kingdom
Boukoku no Nemesis
I look around at the horrors of the landscape. Makeshift graves, along with the ones who were unwillingly left on top of the war-stained soil, scatter across the barren landscape. Here, there is no life, no humanity. Only a long, blood-stained hatred, burdening memories, and death await the ones who dare take the risk to defend their honor, homesteads, and a chance to gain hope, something the people of this kingdom are in desperate need of. Why must we fight?
"Rin, your majesty? Are you feeling okay?" One of the generals, Luka, I think, snaps me out of my daze.
"Oh, yes, I'm alright. Let's move forward."
The soldiers behind me walk with a dreary mood, their armor clanking against their skin. To think that these people look up to me. They see me as their savior, that I will fight for them and to defend our land. The silver crown on my head that marks me as their leader suddenly seems to weigh down on my blonde hair much more than before. Sometimes I really wonder if I'm cut out for this. There's too much at stake here. Yet, I am their leader and I have no other choice, so I move forward and don't look back.
While marching along the war-ridden landscape, my silver rapier bumps against my hip in its sheath. It is my favorite sword, perhaps even considered my good luck charm. It was given to me when during my coronation, and I was trained to use it properly ever since. Because, after all, you never know when danger could strike the queen of a warring kingdom. This war we're marching into, no one really knows a reason to why we fight it. It has been going on for centuries. A previous king of the opposing nation started it, I believe, by stealing land and killing the messenger a previous queen of this kingdom sent over. Now it continues, but not for those reasons. We fight for a winner. No kingdom has won since this battle began. They still steal land and slaughter innocent, as do we, but not for the reasons it started. It's all pointless now, but we cannot afford to lose and neither side will give in. And now, I must defend our honor.
My feet ache, my back hurts, and my head is pounding. The hope of these knights still looms overhead, bearing down on me and making my thoughts jumble themselves up due to my unwilling nervousness. Traveling for hours with armor and a heavy fur coat can really make you worn out, and even the fifty men following behind me grow weary. The general, however, shows no weakness, as expected of someone of her caliber. I want to stop and rest my unfortunate soles, but we must tread on. Stopping is for the weak, and I will show no signs of being it.
Our current goal is to take out the soldiers on stolen land and to gain some ground against our enemies. We're trying to be stealthy about it, but it's hard when you never know who will suddenly turn against you and take you down from the inside.
The land my feet sink into, and that we are about to invade at this very moment has been feuded over for as long as this war has been raging on. It's the middle ground between the two kingdoms, originally belonging to my empire, but was invaded as soon as the war was declared. This once fertile land is now known for being ruined and stained red. The only purpose of invading and reclaiming it, which both empires have done back and forth, is only as a laugh in the other's face. There is no point to it, nothing for the taking but rocks and fallen soldiers. The only thing that comes with it is brief, yet overwhelming hope that we will be victorious and this battle will end. If only that were true.
Suddenly, I feel a tap on my shoulder. I turn around to see Luka stepping back, her hand returning to her side.
"Your majesty, we need a plan," she states.
"Oh, yes. That's right," I say. "How many men are here again?"
"A little over 50," Luka replies. She blows a long, pink strand of hair out of her face. "Also, the enemies have set up a makeshift base somewhere towards the north-eastern edge."
"Right by their home base," I realize.
"Exactly. It was also heard by one of our spies that the King will be visiting the camp. They want to keep the land permanently. It was the King's request, I think."
"Why didn't I hear of this before we left?"
"I apologize, but the messenger stopped me right as we were leaving, and you seemed lost in thought, so I thought it could wait."
"Alright. Thank you," I say.
Turning to face the troops beside me, I tell them my orders.
"We will be heading towards the north-east edge of the territory to drive out the enemy soldiers. Do not attack until I give the order to. It's not very far, so we will be there shortly." Should I tell them about the king? Just in case? "The king is also heading towards the camp set up to see how things are." Numerous whispers arose among the knights. I stayed silent until they ceased. "If by some small chance we are to run into him, you are not to kill him. We have no need to anger the enemy to that degree. Our objective is to win this and have as minimal casualties as possible. So let's march on and win our land back." I look among these people, who look up to me, and see determined faces and heads held high. Then I spin on my heels and keep going.
"Ah!"
I let out a shrill cry of surprise and quickly steady myself before I fall face-first into the dirt. A quiet laugh becomes audible, and I look over my shoulder to see a medium sized rock on the ground and Luka with one pink eyebrow raised and a rare, teasing smile on her face. A glint of amusement is visible in her sky colored eyes. A quick glare from me is all it takes to earn myself another short snicker from her.
"What a mature general I appointed," I mumble and sharply turn back around, making sure my head is held high. The pain in my feet is no longer noticeable, as we have been walking for so long. Once I get back to the palace I swear I'm going to sleep for a whole day, and no one will stop me. Unless my bed catches on fire. Then I might move to the floor or something.
A tall, lone, dead tree visible in the distance catches my attention. That single tree marks how far we have come. It will only be minutes before we arrive.
Luka signals for everyone to walk quietly and hastily, and we pick up the pace a tad bit. My hand instinctively flies to the handle of my blade, it still being in its sheath. I suddenly can't keep control of my thoughts. There are so many unknown factors and questions with no answer yet. How many people are at this camp? What if we run into the king? What will we see? Will we win? Do we have a chance? Will people die? How many? And will… will I make it out alive?
I look over my shoulder at the hopeful and nervous faces behind me, and Luka, in front of them all, sees the trace of panic on my face and nods to me with a determined expression. It's now that I realize, answers isn't what I, and these people I'm leading, need right now. We need strength and confidence in this war, so that's what I will give them.
I turn back around and a long strand of my blonde hair smacks me straight in the face. Then small spots of tan appear in my line of vision on the horizon line. My muscles tense up with frantic anxiety. It's the camp. As we get closer to it, I hear and see enemy troops running around the camp in a frenzy, shouting orders and running to defend their ground. We get closer and closer, my shaking hand still on the handle of my blade. Luka is talking, but I don't know what she's saying. Soon, the camp is in view and the ambushed knights are making a barrier to try to stop us from getting into the camp, though I don't know why. What is there to protect?
Shouting is the only thing I can hear, and all of the words seem to jumble together. Yet still, we march calmly forward and wait. Only a few meters separate me from the thick wall of knights in front of me, and a few men from my side step forward to protect me.
Over the chaos, I shout out "I demand to see the one in charge here."
Seemingly with my presence and my words, silence has all of a sudden crept up on every single person here. No one dares to utter a single word, or move even an inch. My muscles are tense and my knees seem weak, but showing any sign of weakness is almost like voicing you have a death wish, so I keep my hands on my sword handle and don't move them.
Through the deafening silence, hushed bickering rises above everything else.
"Let me go out there!"
Another voice cuts the first one off.
"It's too dangerous. I'm going to speak with that devil. You need to stay here."
I guess all generals are just typically immature people.
"Nope."
"Yes. Stay."
"I'll see you outside."
"Len, your highness! Get back here!"
Len?
As in..?
A tall figure pushes through the middle of the soldier barricade. He's at least 15 centimeters taller than me, and his blond hair is pushed back neatly. On top of his head sits a large bronze crown. He has a fur coat that resembles the one I wear, and a sword at his left hip. His cerulean eyes look determined, and as they meet mine, a flood of emotions flicker through them and tears threaten to spill onto his cheeks. His eyes and their actions resemble mine.
Lost memories and emotions I've not experienced for a long time wash over me like a torrent of water, as if a flood gate suddenly burst. I knew this was coming, but still. Why must I fight him of everyone in this world…
After studying me for a short amount of time, he finally speaks. His voice wavers. "Good day, Queen Rin."
As does mine. "Same to you, King Len."
"The children who stand on the scorched plains
continue to dig graves with their powerless hands."
"But mom! Why can I not leave? I want to be able to see outside this stupid town!"
"Because I said so, Rin. Stay in the village."
"But why!" I shouted, my anger and feelings of rebellion only growing.
"I said so. Don't question my judgement."
"Fine."
"I'm going to the market. If you disobey me again there will be extra chores this week."
"I know, mother."
"I'll see you when I get home. This discussion is over."
She looked like she was going to slam the door, but then her upset expression changed to one of sadness and defeat, and she carefully closed it at the last second. I waited around for a minute, leaning on the windowsill watching her back slowly become smaller as it disappeared into the heart of town. When there was no sight of her, I slowly inched open the door and walked outside, going towards the edges of the village. I stroll calmly through town, my frustration being kept away until I get out of this stupid place. I'll leave if I want to. I can feel the cobble paths beneath my feet through my thin, worn out boots and the wind blows under my tattered bonnet through my matted wreck of hair. People walk cautiously through the streets, as if someone was going to ambush them at any moment. War has been tough on is, but I don't understand how badly. No one will tell me about it anyways.
The small clumps of people creeping through the streets slowly fade, and the low, crippled walls come into view. Chunks of stone lie on the ground, and vines have grown into the cracks and spaces left behind from the missing rubble. In front of me, the cobblestone turns to a dirt road which fades only a few meters from the wall. It's all torn up and covered with grass, some dead, some alive. I look around me at the outside of the village which I have rarely heard about or seen. I've come here a couple times, but it seemed too risky to do oftenly or stay for too long. Now, I couldn't care less even if I tried to.
Beyond the walls lie an endless stretch of dirt and rocks, and as I keep walking, I find beyond all of the nothing is endless amounts of horror. The results of needless war, from what I understand. More dirt and rocks, but there are some trees here. Except everything is stained red and scorched. The only thing that thrives here is death. Swords litter the ground, most stuck into the ground above loosened dirt, acting as gravestones. Further into the distance is a body. One that is living, and is pressing the dirt on a grave towards the earth, packing it so it doesn't go anywhere. This boy looks to be about my age. His yellow-blond hair is matted just like mine. The red button-up shirt he wears is torn and streaked with dirt and mud.
Atop the scarred battlefield, they covered the bodies
of nameless boys and the remaining corpses with earth
The initial shock is gone. Instead of feeling disgusted, I feel kind of saddened by these sights. These graves contained someone who once lived. They weren't just alive, they had feelings and memories. And the war slaughtered it all. Including the one who's being buried right now. This needs to change, and I'm willing to do something about it. For now, I think I'll start with this single grave.
I shuffle my feet and stop to the right of him. Oddly enough, he doesn't even look up at me. My knees make a thud sound as they hit the ground, and I lean forward to help the boy pack the earth down. My hands feel the soil, and it's dry and loose. I see why he's pushing it down now. A minute later, I look over at his face. His eyes stand out the most to me, probably because they're shining with tears. I can't help but ask him about this grave.
"Did you know him?"
He says nothing. I keep packing down the dirt with my now even filthier hands. My dress and sleeves look pretty bad too. Mother will be furious.
He takes me surprise when he replies. "No."
I look at him, then back at this makeshift grave.
"Why are you here then?"
"Why are you helping?"
Hm… that's a good question.
"Because it's only right," I say.
"Then you already know my answer."
He then stands up, and offers me a hand to help me. I observe the dirt still left on his fingers, then place my hand onto his palm. After pulling me up, he promptly lets go.
"What's your name?" I ask, as he walks towards a straggling corpse still left atop the ground.
"Len," he says. "And yours is..?"
"Rin," I reply with a small smile. "I'm from a village.." I look at the sun and study where it is."South-west of here. What about you? Where do you come from?"
"That's not important…" he tells me quietly.
"Oh. Well, alright." A moment of silence follows, which I shortly break. "Hey, Len, if you didn't know him, why were you crying?"
"Why were you crying along with me?
"Steal, be stolen from, what remains is despair."
I reach my hand up to my cheeks to find them damp with tears. I was crying..? Why though…?
"Because… because no one deserves this!" I start to angrily pace back and forth. "What did these people do to deserve to be unfairly murdered by unneeded war! Just because they may be enemies of my country,.."
Len cringes at my words.
"...doesn't mean they should lose everything while the royals sit around and do nothing about it!"
He cringes once more.
"It's unfair! It's not right! It needs to be stopped! I… I want it to end, and I've only just found out the truth. Doesn't that say anything? We need to change... I-" I trip over an unnoticed rock. My arms instinctively thrust forward to catch myself, and I just sit on the ground for a moment, my legs flat on the ground and my weight shifted on my palms. I look down, letting my tears dot the ground. "I just don't understand why."
After a few moments, Len finally speaks up. "I don't either. But we can't do anything about it. People need to stick together in times like this though. So let's be friends, okay?"
"The consequence of mutual loathing."
I lift my head to look at his dirt stained face. "Okay."
"There's one more to bury. I could use some help."
"Let's go then."
"As I embrace a cold corpse,
Each time still-warm eyes begin to shut,"
He helps me up again, and this time I hold on for a second. I squeeze his hand, and he squeezes back. We then let go, and I follow him.
We stop near a tree, where another victim lies a few meters away. A fairly big hole lies next to him, and Len takes his shoulders and drags him into it. I walk over and shove dirt over the top, and once again we pack the earth down. Some time later, it seems firm enough. I lean back onto my knees, desperate to get my weight off of my hands. Len looks at me, his eyes watering once more. Tears already stream down my own face and he stands up and walks towards me. He sits down right in front of me and suddenly wraps his arms around my neck.
"We sobbed, choked with tears."
I hug him back, and together we sob and mourn for our futures and hopes.
"To grieve for those short-lived, lost lives, I can only mourn.
Is there anything I can protect with my own hands?"
-
We kept meeting at that battleground. Of course, when it wasn't being fought on.
"Isn't there anything we could do though? Start a rally or anything?" I once told him.
"I heard someone tried that once. Royals shut it down somehow," he told me.
"Dammit."
"Yeah."
"But what if-" I started off.
He cut me off. "It's hopeless, you know that. There's nothing two fifteen year olds can do. You'd have to be at least a noble to even see the King or Queen."
"I hate it when you're right."
He laughed a bit. "Ah- cheer up a bit. At least we're both living, with a roof over our heads too."
I smiled slightly. "Yes, I guess so." A moment of silence followed. I looked at Len. "You're still an idiot though."
He rolled his eyes. "Whatever you say, moron."
We laughed.
"So we may one day put a stop to this unending war,
So we will no longer have war as well,
We live on."
-
The next year, we were both 16. Sorrow struck my heart and shook my spirit all the way down to the core. I didn't have anywhere to go, but I was forced to run all the way to somewhere, so I immediately thought of our meeting spot. So I stayed there, and I cried, and waited. Seemingly unending tears and hours passed. I stayed there through the night, and fell asleep against the tree.
I woke up the next day to Len shaking me awake. Worry was etched deep into his expression.
"Rin? Rin, what happened? Are you okay? How long were you here? Rin, answer me please.."
I looked at him, and my dried up tears came back to life, but I still felt numb. I felt like I couldn't feel anything.
"Inside, we shared our unhealing wounds."
"They burned it all. My mom, my home, my hopes... my village. All that's left is me, maybe a couple others. But who knows where they went. I have nothing left, except this war which will destroy me like my only family."
He leaned down and hugged me."Don't think like that. I'm still here with you. We can figure something out."
"And if we don't?"
"We will."
"...This is all because of the war, isn't it?"
"Yes. I think so."
"I'm going to end it one day. I swear I will. I'll do it for my village. I'll even become queen if I have to, and you'll fight right along by my side. Right?"
"... yeah."
"Promise?"
"I promise we will end this together."
_ Half a year passed, and I ended up moving to a nearby village and working at an inn. I still saw Len, but as we grew older, I saw him less often every month. He would never tell me why, even when I pestered him about it to the point he wanted to scream. But he always had a guilty look on his face, and I wanted to know why. We shared everything with each other. But when I thought about it more, I didn't know anything about Len. Only that he lived in a small village in the opposite kingdom and he hated this feud as much as I did. I decided to inquire him about it one day. So when I saw him three days later, I asked him about it as we were walking along the old battlefield, which was slowly growing back, to my happiness.
"Len, there must be a reason you don't see me as much."
"Just work. It's nothing very important."
"But it is."
"Not at all. How is your job going?"
I was getting frustrated at this point. "Stop changing the goddamn subject!"
"It's none of your business."
"Yes it is! All of these years I've told you everything and trusted you with everything. You can trust me too you know! Just… tell me. It's okay, really."
"It's.. family business."
"Of what sort?"
"It's important things we're dealing with."
"Just tell me. Do you think I will get mad?"
He sighed. "Yes."
"I won't. Are you dealing with those god-awful royals or something horrid like that?" I snickered a bit. "That would just be dreadful."
"Yes, we are actually."
"Oh, okay then. What are they pestering you about."
"Rin, I've never told you about my family for a reason."
"And why is that?"
"You'd hate me for it."
This doesn't look good. I say softly "And why is that..?"
"My family is quite powerful.. they're… the, uh.. king and queen possibly?"
"And if you're their son, that makes you…" My voice quivers. "the prince..? The much loved one that everyone I know is always going on about..?"
He looks down, then slowly nods his head.
"And who is next in line for the throne…?"
I take a step back from him, my eyes fixed on his guilty face with horror.
"And… and the one that was given credit for the order to burn my home?"
I see a tear roll down his face, almost reluctantly. Then his emotions break through. Almost like he's pleading with me, he steps towards me, speaking softly, choked with tears, saying "I didn't do it, Rin! I swear! My parents pinned it onto me! They've been training me to take over the war one day and I was going to do everything I could to end it! Rin, you have to hear me out.. Please, I… I-"
I'm sobbing by now. "Save it."
"Rin please!"
I step backwards, further and further away from the person who I trusted more than anything in this damned world. He reacts to this by walking closer to me, trying to reach for my hand.
"You almost killed me. You killed my friends and my mother. And you swore you'd stop this with me. At least I know that's a lie now. You're just trying to keep this going, and manipulate me too. Were you trying to get information out of me or something? Are your parents paying you?"
His face is filled with heartbreak, agony, despair, torment. And what I feel is… betrayal. He… he betrayed me. And I'll never forgive him.
"Rin? Please, just listen. I-"
"Goodbye Len."
I turn on my heels and start to get out of there as fast as I can, but the last, quiet words that are so choked with tears and full of desperateness and grief that the tears I shed fall even quicker than before. Those last words I ever hear from him stop me in my tracks.
"I'm sorry… I'm so sorry… Don't leave me Rin.. I love you, please... "
"Believe in what we'd spoken about,
in the promise we'd made as children; I swear I will fulfill it with my own hands."
I run as fast as I possibly can. My trust was broken, and now my heart is too. I swear on my own life, I will end this war. I'll rise to power and end this tragedy by myself.
Even if it means defying my heart and what I really feel.
-
"Time flows on, forgetting the past
How much longer will this blood-stained lineage continue?"
"How have you been, Rin?" Why does he care?
"Fine without you," I reply. "Time sure can make you forget, can't it?"
The soldiers look genuinely bewildered.
Hope sparks to life in his eyes."You know what they say, forgive and forget."
Have I forgiven him? "I don't know, Len."
The hope I see in him doesn't waver. "Well when you do, you know I'll be there to listen." His expression falters for only a second, turning into one of disappointment and longing, almost as if he wished he could change the past. Then, it returned to one of a determined man. "Unlike those in the past, I promise I'll listen. No matter what you do."
I guess Len is angry about that. I would be too, now that I think about it. I left him all alone. But those words were harsh, and I realize I cannot stand around any longer. This will end soon.
I move the hand on my rapier handle and draw the blade out of its sheathe, keeping it pointed down at the ground.
"Atop the stolen land, carrying hopes, I draw my sword,
and met you, from memories long ago, on the other side of my blade."
His eyes, brightened from his tears, widen as he understands what his words have done. One of his hands then moves to the blade at his side. Then, he looks at the people behind him, and back at me. A look of hesitation crosses his face. "We don't have to fight, Rin."
He moves only a few centimeters forward, which surprises me and scares me at the same time. I move one foot back in retaliation.
"I'd searched so long for you Rin."
Is this some sort of trap? Is he playing some sort of mind game?
"Now, you're right before my eyes..."
Another step forward on his part causes me to step one foot back, here on this battlefield and also in my mind, towards the verge of mentally breaking. With unending tears streaming from his desperate eyes, he pushes me over the edge.
Believe in the you I'd known, and move forwards, for you, and now you're here; We -
"How can we fight, Rin?"
I understand where he's coming from.. I don't want to fight him. Not him, of everyone here. I'd take down anyone else, but not him. After all, I still… well… what do I feel for him? I don't know, I really don't. But that doesn't matter, because these people need me to fight him. For children like Len and I long ago who also need this endless war to stop. So they don't face the tragedy we did. I will fight. I point my blade upwards, so it faces straight in front of Len.
"
Without wiping my overflowing tears, I face the blade.
Return our destroyed future, return our country, I shout out,"
Ignoring my tears, my heart's only way of pleading with me not to betray myself, I give my original demands.
"Because we must, Len. You've refused to listen to my people's cries."
"-If you could allow me to atone,"
"No. Give them their futures back, return their peace and land!"
"Rin, what about your own future?" he inquires.
"That doesn't matter. It was already stolen long ago. They were stolen by a boy I once knew."
"Then I'll protect our future, protect you! Rin I still-" he shouts out.
Once more ignoring my urge to fall to my knees and sob, I give the order that will unleash the horrors of what this battlefield has seen over and over throughout this war.
"My people, let us take everything that has been stolen from us back! Charge!"
"...but my voice doesn't reach."
People all around us rush forward to fight for their leader. Swords clash and screams arise, then slowly die off. And as for Len and I, we reluctantly join in this fight too. I rushed forward first, not even bothering with my tears which spill off of my cheeks and down to the ground. I do not wish for either of is to die here. Len reacted with no hesitation, swiftly taking his sword to defend himself from someone of memories long ago, someone he would not let go of easily. Attack after attack is thrown out by me, and then put down with no struggle by Len's own blade. He won't hurt me, but why? After all I've put him through there is plenty of reasons for him to fight back.. to kill me.
"I see my words no longer reach you. But why won't you listen to me, now or even in those moments long ago? It isn't too late. Must I continue to receive your blade, even after everything?"
He still will not try to hit me with his sword. Why won't he? Why is he so goddamn stubborn? But then, surprisingly, he does attack me. Not with a physical blade though. No, it is much sharper than his sword or mine, and pierces right through my heart, down into my very soul. He leaps backwards, avoiding a jab to his stomach, then looks up at me straight into my eyes with his own. Tears continue to spill from both pairs.
He says to me, with overwhelming grief and sadness. "I guess, then, the promise we'd made as children has disappeared, unfulfilled."
I let my arms go limp, and my sword goes to my side. Shock and rage spill over the gates which have kept my emotions at bay for too long.
"I'd believe in, and continue to wait for you."
I scream with pent up emotions "No! It's not our promise! You're not the boy I knew, who I made a promise with. He was the person who despised it all as much as I did. He supported me, he held me while I cried. He laughed with me, and he was there for me. He was supposed to fight for what was right along by my side. I loved him, and most of all, he loved me."
He gives me a sad smile. "He still does."
"Then I'll wait for him, and I'll fight for him. I'll end this war, and he will come back to me."
"I really hope that happens, for your sake and mine. And that girl I once knew long ago, I will wait for her too. I'll end this for her."
"Short-lived, fallen tears, and the buds left behind, connect the future.
If those lives bet cannot be repaid."
I find myself running at him once more, my rage and frustration back to normal, and a fresh sense of determination. Our blades clash, over, and over, and over. We dance around each other, letting the mindset of ending this by winning take me by the hand and lead me through this dance of fury and natural grace. Knights around me fall, but my focus is not on that. I have to win… I have to, for him. Just for him.
"So he may protect the future we'd both dreamed of-
In order to steal and throw away those dreams of the future-
We will fight."
This fight that captivates me, which has now turned more personal than I could have thought, still keeps pushing on through my exhaustion. I mentally cannot take anymore of this torture, but my rapier still moves, swiping, jabbing, and blocking. My muscles scream.. like the soldiers around me.
He speaks through gritted teeth. "Please, Rin, give it up."
"Not for you," I retort, dodging a swing from his sword.
"Deceiving even my heart, I point my blade at you."
This unneeded fight is taking a toll on me right now. And I don't even know what to think of him. When I get the chance, will I kill him, or not? I hesitate for a moment, and he rushes forward. One rushed, careless jab towards his shoulder is all it takes for me to get my precious rapier, my only source of defense here, sent flying out of my hands.
A feeling of shock rapidly sweeps over me. No… I will not lose. I still need to fulfill my promise. I run for my sword, but a familiar blade blocks me from it, getting dangerously close to my neck. I can feel the chill from it. It's right at my neck.
A sheepish, guilty look crosses his face and he mumbles to me as he takes a step towards me "You very well know one cannot kill the one they love, war or not."
Through the desperation and the will not to die, I find the feeling I've kept buried for so long.
"You're right. I-... I can't hurt you."
A sad, small smile creeps onto his face, "And I can't hurt you either."
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Luka push down the enemy soldier she was fighting and fling herself towards my direction.
I hear her scream "Rin! Get out of there!"
I turn my attention back to Len. Once again, those many emotions we've felt for each other, grief, guilt, joy.. and love… are shown through his teary cerulean eyes briefly, then fade, like a whirlwind of passing breezes. My briefly dried tears fall once more.
"Don't cry, Rin. Remember, I will believe in and continue to wait for you. Maybe this promise of ours isn't impossible. We can do it."
"Len, look at where we are now. You have a sword to my throat. We… this… we can't. It's impossible. I'll end this, for the future."
I feel a hand on my shoulder, and I'm being tugged out of Len's trance. It's Luka.
She pleads with me through her eyes. "You need to call a retreat. With the King here, there were too many troops here. People are dying, Rin. Let's get out of here, fast."
She's right. I was too caught up in my memories. How could I have been so foolish like that... this isn't just about me. And I know I will fight him once more. But next time, I'll fight for that future I yearn for so much. I'll do whatever it takes. I shout as loud as I can "Everyone, retreat!"
I turn to run, to lead everyone away from this painful place. Len's gaze weighs down on me like a thousand pounds. Our last exchange runs through my mind. I'm sorry, but this is impossible. My people come first. We can never be close, always torn apart by war. And now that I think, we always were torn apart by it, we just didn't notice at first. But... our promise...
I will keep it. You'll see, Len. Just... Wait for me, and you'll see me fulfill this very promise of ours with my own two hands.
"until I, Rin Kagamine, fulfill the promise
from those foolish days with my own hands."
