I don't own The Blacklist and I don't make money with fanfiction.

This is a SHORT oneshot narrated from an unusual perspective...

Please read and review!

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I know many things. I see and hear everything. I know what people do when they think they're alone; alone with themselves or alone with other people. I witness kisses, fights, top secret, private conversations and silence, sometimes even murders happen when I'm around.

There's this guy, I think his name is Cooper, he's the boss. He has trouble walking, but he still has everything under control. Due to these problems with his leg, he does those funny physio therapy exercises when nobody's watching...

People do what he says, at least most of the time. Actually, he's pretty cool. Sometimes, he even manages to keep this man with the expensive suits and the sexy butt that every woman stares at in line, but I'll come back to him later.

Then there's one of his agents. His name is Donald Ressler. He's always arguing with the guy in the suits, but he never wins an argument because the other man is just too smart for everyone else. I heard people calling him a good agent. He's always talking to himself when he's with me, sometimes he's singing...he should either take classes or stop singing at all...

Another member from Cooper's team is Aram, the computer scientist. He's smart, cute and good-looking. I like his smile, it lights up my mood even when I witnessed hours of silence and bad energy. It sounds weird, but he has a small notebook with him all the time and does complicated math exercises when he's alone...I guess he wants to keep his brain working...

He has a crush on this Mossad lady, she's called Samar. She's beautiful, she has black, long hair...God, I like that hair. She, just like the other female agent, has crazy ninja-like fighting skills, which she practices when I'm around. She doesn't see me, and even if she did, she would attack me to prove her knowledge of martial arts...If I could, I would be a tiny bit afraid of her...

They are always flirting when they think nobody is listening, but they don't know about me.

Never mind. Now to the woman who has a complicated relationship with the guy in the expensive suit. I haven't really figured out how they feel about each other...it seems to be a mixture between love and hate. Well, certainly not hate, but they indeed do fight a lot. They yell at each other, I've seen her punch and slap him and I heard a rumor that she almost killed him with a pen. I've also seen them kiss, whisper obscene things in each others ears that would make me blush if I could. They made love when I was around one time. They banged against the door, not caring about the surveillance camera.

Back to the woman. She's Agent Elizabeth Keen, divorced from her pretend husband who seems to be an assassin for all I know. People talk about her, she's obviously the center of the gossip in the office, although she doesn't know about it. In fact, some people know more about her than she does. I'd find that creepy if I had feelings...

The man she kisses calls her 'Lizzie' or 'sweetheart', but most people call her Liz. When he's mad at her, he calls her 'Agent Keen'...it really is a complicated relationship.

There are a lot more agents in the Post Office, how they call it, but the team I described is the most important. They solve every single case, they are often in trouble and they have a valuable asset: the man wearing the expensive suits.

His name is Raymond Reddington, he isn't an FBI agent, he's a criminal. He doesn't come into the Post Office that often, but I spent a lot of time thinking about him.

He's dangerous, even violent sometimes, and he can clean his gun in under two minutes...

When he's alone, he practices monologues which indeed sound very impressing. I always enjoy listening to him because his voice is just too sexy...I wonder if he isn't a little too old for Agent Keen, but the age difference doesn't seem to be a problem for them, although the entire office makes disparaging remarks about the two of them. In my opinion, they are just jealous that he is only interested in 'his Lizzie'.

You wonder how I know all this? I am the elevator.

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Thanks for reading, please leave a review and tell me what you think.

I stole the idea from an old NCIS fanfic :)