Elementary, My Dear Sheldon

"What was that?" Penny's voice was the first to speak out of the darkness. The only light sources around the room were the reduced light from laptops on battery and a few glowing action figures.

"I'm not sure, but if I had to guess the power went out" said Howard.

"Spoken like a true engineer" said Leonard. "Sheldon, you did pay the power bill didn't you?"

There was a mumbled reply from out of the bedroom as the sound of moving could be heard. A bouncing light came down the hallway and into the room as Sheldon was revealed wearing his miner's helmet with lamp. "Of course I paid it, on the 20th like I do every month." Leonard's face was illuminated from the miner's lamp as if he was being interrogated as Sheldon spoke to him.

"Hey guys, the power is out up and down the street. It looks like a couple blocks are out" said Raj as he looked out the window of the apartment. A crash could be heard down below. "Traffic lights too." As he said this his backside was spotlighted by Sheldon.

"You still have that miner's helmet?" asked Amy as the light swung towards her.

"Sure, I keep it with my bowling ball. You never know when you'll need it" said Sheldon.

"Yeah, I'm always having to roll a strike in the dark" Howard chipped in before he got lit up.

"Sheldon?" Bernadette asked.

"Yes?" Now her face was ablaze with light.

"Aim that lamp up or down before I give you a colonoscopy with it." Sheldon quickly swung the angle of the light up so that the light was cast toward the ceiling. "They never disparage another miner's light down in the shafts."

"So, what are we going to do now?" asked Amy. "No computers, no TV, no cooking..."

"Somebody look on their phones to see how long it's supposed to be out" said Leonard as he went to get candles.

"Oops, mine needs charging" said Penny.

"Mine too" said Raj.

"Mine works fine" said Sheldon. He checked online. "The power company doesn't know when it will get fixed yet."

Leonard made it back with a few candles which he lit and placed around the room. "We could drive somewhere."

"Without traffic lights? I'm not going to immerse myself into vehicular anarchy" stated Sheldon flatly. "I'll just shelter in place until the power comes back on."

"And let roving bands of looters storm the apartment?" asked Leonard with a grin.

Sheldon ran over to the front door to make sure it was locked before returning to the group. "Of course in the case of a fire you just locked our escape route and access from firefighters" added Raj. Sheldon ran back over and unlocked the door.

"Of course if some of those firefighters are really maniacs in disguise..." Leonard finished.

Sheldon locked the door. Then unlocked it. Then locked it again. Finally he unlocked it and opened it up. "I'll just die in the dark with everyone else then."

"If we're going to stay here until the power comes back on, then what ARE we going to do?" Amy asked again.

"I know," said Raj "let's do a story with a hole. I'll present a mystery and you solve it by asking yes or no questions."

The group let out a collective groan. Raj's party ideas usually didn't go over very well.

"No guys, this one is a lot easier. No costumes..." he explained.

"...that's an improvement, I don't want to dress up like a nun again" said Penny.

"...or having to run around town for clues" Raj added.

"Good, dodging those kids at the skate park almost killed me" Leonard reminisced.

"Now all you need to remove is the mystery and you've invented the perfect game" Howard chided.

"Well, what else do you guys do for fun when the lights go off?" Sheldon asked.

The group mumbled for a moment and decided that maybe a story with a hole wasn't so bad after all. Raj started it off. "This is how we'll play. We go around the circle and take turns. If you ask a question and get an answer of 'no' or 'it doesn't matter' it goes to the next person. If you get a 'yes' or 'rephrase the question' ask again. You can only solve the mystery on your turn."

He continued. "The mystery is: She wants to cross the room but can't. Sheldon, you go first."

"I apologize to everybody in advance for you not getting a turn after I solve it. Let's see...is she alive?" Sheldon asked.

"Yes."

"Is she...an alien?" "No." Sheldon looked hurt that his idea wasn't right. "Leonard, your turn."

"Can she see the other side of the room?" he asked. "Yes." "Okay, that rules out she lost her glasses. Is she asleep?"

"No. Penny?"

"Is she an actress?" The group stared at her. "Maybe the director told her to stay on that spot" she explained.

"No. Howard?"

"Is the room in an apartment?" "Yes." "Is it the living room?" "Yes." "Is there furniture in her way?" "No. Bernadette?"

"Oh, I don't care. Is she shorter than me?" "Yes." Now she was interested. "Is her growth stunted?" Before they could ask she said "Just checking to see if she is a dwarf or a midget."

"That's about what it would take" Howard muttered under his breath. The sharp thump got to the leg proved he should have muttered quieter. "No. Amy?"

"Is she hypnotized?" "No. Sheldon, around to you again."

"Is there a force field holding her back?" "No. Leonard?"

"Is there anyone else in the room?" "No. Penny?"

"Has she crossed the room before?" "Yes." "Has she been told not to cross?" "No. Howard?"

Howard was still rubbing his leg. "Is it unsafe to cross the floor?" "No. Bernadette?"

"Is she on medication that is stopping her?" "No. Amy?"

"Is she afraid of crossing the room?" "No. Sheldon?"

"Let me think..." While Sheldon was thinking Howard tried juggling his phone up in the air in the darkened room. On the third trip he fumbled and it fell to the floor. "Okay," Sheldon continued "is she being held back by magic?" "No magic in this story. Leonard?"

"Is she...healthy?" "Yes." "Is she being restrained?"

"Rephrase the question" Raj directed.

"Is she tied down or chained?" "No."

Just then someone else spoke. "Can I ask a question?" It was Stuart.

"Stuart, sure. Did you sneak in during the game?"

"No, I was here when it was still light. You don't remember giving me a ride here?"

"Oh, sorry, I kind of forgot in the dark. Sure, go ahead."

"You kind of forget in the light too. Is she a baby or young child?" "Yes." "Does she want to get to something on the ceiling?" "Yes." "Does she want to touch the ceiling fan/light fixture?"

"Yes. We have a winner folks" Raj declared.

"How did you get it?" asked Sheldon. "You didn't even ask any questions while we were playing."

"No, but I listened to the questions of everyone else. You all specialized your questions based on what your jobs are. Sheldon went with wild theoretical ideas. Leonard spent his questions trying to disprove what ideas he had. Penny was concerned about the motivation of the girl as if the girl was an actress. Howard was zeroed in on the construction and layout of the room. Bernadette was working the physical/medical angle. Amy concerned herself with the actual thinking of the girl. I was putting it all together and then Howard started juggling his phone. That gave me the idea about up and down and not across the room. So I took my shot."

"It looks like the simple comic book guy beat you all today" trumpeted Raj. "You don't have to have a big brain to win."

"Thanks...I guess" said Stuart.

"And Sheldon would have been stuck asking questions and still not getting it all night...night...night..."

Sheldon woke up in a panic. It had just been a dream. "Of course it was a dream," he reassured himself "none of us act like that in real life." He laid back down, but couldn't entirely comfort himself with the thought.

The End


A/N: I got a lot of requests for another Big Bang story, so I wrote this one ahead of some other projects I'm working on just to get another one out for the readers. Some friends of mine and I used to play this game when we got tired of board games way back in the day, or were stuck in a car while driving somewhere to bowl or see a movie. At least I got Leonard into the story this time.