Disclaimer: I don't own Monk. I don't own Trudy. All I own is the plotline and it was slightly inspired by another story I read. So without another word… well Monk would argue that technically with another word… many more words but anyway—without any more ado (sorry Monk there's no way to make ado 4 letters…lol) I present to you Mr. Monk gets a gentle scolding.
"Adrian!"
Monk knew that voice. He loved that voice. It was usually sweeter then a baby's laughter. It was the one thing that kept him from going insane after he lost Trudy. It was her voice. It was all the times he saw her. Usually it was a soft and gentle one but today it sounded stern and even on the verge of angry.
In the other room he could hear his friends laughing. Sharona was laughing too. They were all playing charades. She had completely ignored his telling her she was not supposed to get involved in anything that anyone was doing or do anything on her own for that matter until he said it was okay. Yeah he knew he was being a stinker lately but she had actually accused him of being insensitive. From the look on his wife's face he could tell that she was less then pleased with his behavior.
"What in the world has gotten into you Adrian," she asked him gently but at the same time clearly not the same way she usually was. There was no laughter in her voice and no tenderness though there was love.
"Trudy you don't understand," he said whining, "She actually accused me of being insensitive"
Trudy raised an eyebrow.
"I wonder why," she said.
"I don't know exactly. I couldn't put up with what her saying that"
"Adrian how many times have I told you that you were being insensitive""I know," he acknowledged looking down in shame for a second, "but that's different"
"How is it different?"
He looked down again. He couldn't answer.
"Adrian"
"She's not you," he explained, "I can't treat her like she's you. I love you too much. There can never be another you"
"What have you been doing that's been insensitive within the past short while?"
"Well I've…"
His voice trailed off. He knew what he was doing. He knew TRUDY knew what he was doing.
"Go on," she encouraged lovingly yet sternly.
"I guess it started when I told her to suck it up with her fear of elephants."
"Why would you do that? Does she ever tell you to suck it up when you are afraid of something and frankly not all your fears make a lot of sense unless people know you well enough to understand it"
"I've been refusing to pass her the deserts after dinner," Monk admitted, "and I pointed out that she didn't need it. She was getting a little-"
"Flabby. That was the actual word you used. You actually told her in front of everyone that you have staying over your house for the holidays that she was getting flabby after someone else passed her the desert. Do you think that was very sensitive of you?"
"Well no but she wasn't supposed to have desert anyway. She accused me of being insensitive"
"Well comparing her, in a negative way to everyone else in your life is very insensitive," Trudy pointed out reminding him of what had started the incident.
It was true. Adrian had done that. But Sharona was the only one who really held him accountable for his obnoxious behavior. She was the only one that didn't kowtow to his demands, IE a bathroom schedule. Since he was having so many people he decided that they could only go to the bathroom when it was their scheduled time. He made a list in alphabetical order of who can use the bathroom and when they could use the bathroom. In his mind it made perfect sense. Of course in his mind it should be illegal to chew gum and he once tried to arrest someone for chewing gum. Trudy had been alive and she was with him and put a stop to that quickly. Adrian could handle Trudy's criticisms and corrections.
In the course of their 13 years of knowing each other and their 7 years of marriage she had corrected him a round dozen times. She got mad at him once but it was gentle and well deserved. Twice she had put a stop to his cleaning for a certain amount of time when his incessant cleaning had put his life at risk. Rarely did she ever scold him, but now she felt it was necessary to talk some sense into him.
"But honey she's been so critical of the way I've been acting lately"
"What else have you done," Trudy asked
"Well… the other day when she was watching TV I turned it off on her"
"ADRIAN!"
"I also put her computer on a pass code so she couldn't use it and I…"
"Go on," she encouraged
"Whenever we all do a group activity I try to make it uncomfortable for her because I don't think she should be joining us because she's been so difficult"
"Adrian right now you're lucky I'm not alive because if I were you'd be 'spanked' with that here pillow," she said but mildly and laughing.
"What's so wrong about what I did," he asked, "and what about what she did"
"What did she do?"
"A lot of things," he replied, "She goes to the bathroom even when it isn't her turn-"
"If I were alive," Trudy asked, "Would you have that attitude if I went to the bathroom out of turn"
"N-no of course not. But there are 11 people here. We need some sort of order. Someone needs to be in charge here"
"Not of when a person goes to the bathroom," Trudy pointed out
"She's also been mean to Natalie"
"Adrian you said IN FRONT OF SHARONA that Natalie was better at everything then Sharona is. How do you think that would make you feel if someone said that to you"
"I was just telling the truth. Natalie's better then Sharona and you're better then all of them put together"
"Sometimes the truth is not necessary to be told," Trudy said
"She was using the bathroom outside her allotted time"
"Adrian it doesn't matter. Would you have said something like that about me or spoken to me the way you would to her"
Adrian just shook his head. He had never been able to chide his wife for anything… even if she had done something stupid. He was always so protective of her.
"No," he whispered, "I wouldn't have acted like that if it were you"
"Go talk with Sharona," Trudy said her voice going from scolding to soft, "She needs to know that you care about her. She needs to know she's still loved"
"How do I know she'll listen," Monk asked
"I guarantee she'll listen," Trudy promised.
"You promise?"
"Don't I always?"
"You know maybe I should-"
"Adrian," she said in a mildly scolding tone, "just go talk to her"
Adrian waited until the game was over and then he went up to her and tapped her on the shoulder.
"Sharona," he said gently, "can I talk with you alone for a minute"
"Um… yeah I guess so. How about outside on the patio?"
He nodded in approval and they went outside.
"Do you want to sit down," he asked her hesitantly.
Now it was her turn to nod. She sat down across from him.
"So what do you want," she asked.
It took him a couple of minutes before he could actually express himself.
"Trudy talked to me today," he began.
This didn't surprise her. Adrian and Trudy were always having conversations. They were talking about everything and it didn't surprise her that Trudy was talking with him.
"She didn't just talk with me. She… she scolded me for the way that I've been acting towards you even so far as to say that if she'd been alive I'd have been spanked with a pillow… but no matter. That's a story for another day"
"I think maybe I'm missing the point," Sharona said confused.
"Look… Sharona, I am a man that likes things to be a certain way and I get very uncomfortable when they don't go my way"
"Yeah… I've noticed"
"What I do realize now more then ever is that I've been a bit of a…"
"Jerk, pig-head, hurtful—take your pick. There's more if that doesn't cover it"
"That's only three. Come on with one more," he asked
"Stupid oh… no way insensitive"
"That's five"
"Thoughtless," Sharona concluded
Monk counted and found that right as rain there were six words. Six was an even number so everything was right now.
"I will admit to being a bit insensitive and thoughtless but you weren't exactly nice to Natalie, you've been ignoring me doing everything I tell you that you can't do, you don't clean up after yourself after going to the bathroom and you don't even go during allotted times, you play the radio and the television loudly… is that sensitive and thoughtful"
"Adrian put yourself in my shoes. You outright said that Natalie was a better assistant, a better cook, a better cleaner and a better friend then I was. You put up rules about when people can and can't use the bathroom. You try to stop me from enjoying a time with friends and family. You turn the TV of on me when I'm in the middle of watching, you try to make every activity awkward for me including dinner when you told me I was flabby and you put a password on my computer so I couldn't use it… just to name a few things. I could name more but I know I'm on an even number right now. How do you think that makes me feel?"
Adrian sighed.
"Okay," he said, "I maybe didn't go about it the right way-"
"Maybe?"
Adrian could swear he heard Trudy speaking at the same time as Sharona.
"Okay I definitely didn't go about it the right way."
"Then," Sharona continued, "to add insult to injury you talk to me like I'm so stupid little kid"
Adrian drew in a breath. Then he considered what he wanted to say before talking. He had to tread carefully because he was already in enough trouble as it was
"I didn't mean what I said about Natalie being better then you," he told her honestly, "I was upset about you breaking my bathroom rules. Looking back now those rules were stupid. You were trying to tell me how you were feeling and because I was uncomfortable with that and I felt like I would be betraying Trudy by acting in a positive way-"
"You thought what!"
"Sharona you know about how I was with Trudy. You know how positive I was with her, how gentle I was with her, how much I loved her"
"Yeah"
"What you don't know is… I blamed myself when she died because I was too positive. She wasn't supposed to be were she was that day. I felt like I could have prevented it and I didn't want you talking to the guy you're talking to. He's bad news Sharona. I can sense it"
"DO I HAVE TO SLAP YOU UPSIDE THE HEAD," Sharona scolded but mildly, "blaming yourself for Trudy's death is stupid with a capital stupid. An' if you had a concern about me you could have addressed it with me instead of this STUPID pretense. What was your plan for after the holiday huh?
"I dunno," Monk admitted, "my plan was to prove that he was bad news before the holiday"
"Yeah well that was stupid. If you ever have a concern about me and you don't share it with me I'mma get that pillow myself. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"
"You couldn't be clearer if you were crystal," Monk replied
"Good. Now that we have that out of the way there's a reason that I'm "flabby" as you put it"
"I don't think I need to-"
"I'm pregnant"
"PREGNANT! You mean with a baby?"
"No with a chimpanzee"
"You had sex intercourse with a chimpanzee? Was it Darwin?
"Adrian I was being sarcastic"
"Who's the father?"
"My brother in law"
"You had an affair with your brother-in-law"
Sharona slapped him upside the head
"No you idiot," she said, "I'm carrying Gail's baby since Gail couldn't."
"O-0h. That's an amazing thing Sharona. You're even better of a person then I realized"
And he surprised her by hugging her
