Disclaimer: I own not Bleach
Byakuya was feeling giddy with excitement, but he maintained the same calm, cold demeanor on the outside. Why was he giddy with excitement? BECAUSE IT WAS HIS BIRTHDAY!!!!! WHEEEEEEEE!!! Oh joy! Byakuya considered skipping through the sixth squad barracks and swinging his scarf around his head but decided his reputation could not take a blow like that.
Meanwhile, Ichigo was fetching the mail. He found a beautifully embossed card. Light pink cardboard with little gold letters spelling out: Party Invitation. Curious, Ichigo peered inside.
Dear honored guest,
I, Kuchiki Byakuya, am hosting a party in honor of myself. There will be chocolate truffle cake and many candles, which I shall blow out in one breath. Please attend or I shall be highly offended and destroy you.
Kuchiki Byakuya
P.S. No alcohol, weapons, narcotics, or frivolous behaviour will be tolerated
Dress: Formal
Ichigo stared at the card with slight disgust. He could envision a party thrown by that marble-faced noble. However, he did have a mathematics lesson this afternoon. Not very much choice here was there? Both options consisted of Ichigo being bored to death. With a great sigh, he went indoors to dress up for the party.
Urahara was delighted when he found the invitation on his doormat.
"My, my, a party!! Oooooh, cake!! GAAAERRGH???!!!" Urahara exclaimed. The last phrase was uttered when he read the P.S. note at the bottom of the page and was spoken in a tone of outrage and dispair.
"Very well," he sighed "No drugs, booze or fun then." He sadly began packing. Six bottles of sake, A pair of nunchuks, and some Marijuana cigarettes. He attempted to stuff Yoruichi-san in her cat form into his bag as well but she smashed his face in and reverted to human form.
"Come on, Yoruichi-san" Urahara's bruised face attempted to grin, but the pain was too great. "We're going to a parteeeee!!!"
Yoruichi sniffed haughtily and walked out, smacking Urahara on the head hard as she did so.
Shunsui was sleeping on his desk. The roof was definitely more comfortable, but Nanao-chan had insisted that he do some work, so Shunsui had no choice but to sleep on all the paperwork instead, how uncomfortable! Which is why he had moved it all the Nanao-chan's desk instead, except for a few documents which he had folded into little paper airplanes and thrown everywhere.
15 minutes later, Nanao-chan stalked up to her slightly snoring captain, snatched off his ridiculous hat and began beating him with it.
"Ow! Ow! Wha-Stop. I-" Shunsui crawled under his desk in an attempt to weather the ferocious assault of his vice-captain.
"GET-OUT-OF-THERE-AND-DO-SOME-WORK!!!" Nanao-chan emphasized each word with a slap of the hat. She stopped, out of breath and also because Shunsui had disappeared under the desk. His voice floated out from under the table.
"Lovely, lovely Nanao-chan. I know you wouldn't hurt me on purpose. Let me come out and we can drink sake together." Shunsui sang out.
"Keep dreaming!" Nanao-chan snapped and she threw the hat like a frisbee under the table, ignoring the squawk of pain as his hat hit shunsui in the eye.
Just then, a hell butterfly fluttered up to Shunsui, who was clutching his face and moaning in exaggerated agony under the table, making pained noises that were being pointedly ignored by Nanao-chan. The message delivered by the butterfly made Shunsui forget that he was supposed to be mortally wounded. He leapt out from under the desk, scattering papers.
"Party at Kuchiki's!!! Let's go!" He cried, and with that he grabbed Nanao-chan around the waist and shunpo'd off, grabbing seven urns of Sake on the way.
All across Soul Society, Shinigami listened in disbelief at the news delivered by the Hell butterflies. Word spread like wildfire. Renji promptly fainted when he heard the news.
"Kuchiki Taichou? Holding a party? Never!!" thought Renji, stunned. Never before had Byakuya attended social gatherings, much less host one himself. It was all very out of character.
"Nii-sama is holding a party?" Rukia was amazed, but rather pleased that there would be cake to eat.
"cheh! I'm not going." Hitsugaya sat on a chair, his legs dangled off the floor by several feet, reading the letter.
"Taichooouuu…" Matsumoto whined, pouting at her captain. She leaned forward, hoping to persuade her captain through use of her ample chest.
"Matusmoto, if it didn't work on me the first time, it won't work the second time, or the third and so on." Hitsugaya scowled
"Hmph! Only because you haven't reached puberty yet!" Matsumoto turned away indignantly.
"I am well into puberty, I'll have you know!" Hitsugaya spluttered.
"No way!" she insisted, "real men go to parties!"
"That's it! We're going!" Hitsugaya stood up, infuriated, though he didn't look any taller than when he was sitting down.
"Oh taichou! Really?" Matusmoto didn't give him time to answer, instead dragging him out the door and in the direction of the party.
"Eh? Party?" Zaraki's illiteracy allowed him to understand only that word, but that was enough.
"Party? Party??? Yay!!! Let's go yachiru, we can start a huge fight!!" Zaraki sprinted off with his vice-captain clinging onto his back.
Meanwhile, Byakuya was beginning preparations for his party.
