Determined to think no more of the egocentric Mr Darcy, Elizabeth arose early Tuesday morning and set off on her usual jaunt to Oakham Mount. She had sneaked into the kitchen with as much stealth as could be managed and snatched a fresh pastry from the tray Cook had placed on the table mere minutes earlier. With Evelina, a novel she only just started, tucked under her dark green pelisse and a matching bonnet strapped haphazardly under her chin, she hurried down the path and out into the fields.
The cold air and mist turned to gold by the shy rays of sunlight peeking through the clouds, did much to ease her mind as she slowed her pace ever so slightly on her ascent of the mount. At last, red-nosed, bonnet-less, and with a decidedly ruddy glow she emerged from the mist and reached the peak. The sun had only just fully appeared in the sky and she found herself mesmerized by its beauty.
So absorbed was she that her first realization of Mr Darcy's horse standing surprisingly near her was when it let out a soft neigh. Startled, she spun around to face its very unwelcome owner and, without a word of greeting, inquired as to the gentleman's tendency towards frightening young women alone in the countryside.
"Good morning Miss Bennet. I assure you I had no intention of startling you, I was simply distracted by the beauty of the countryside, and was completely unaware of your presence," said he, with a bow and every effort to sound amiable. It was a truth almost universally unknown that Mr Darcy was indeed extremely attracted to this infuriatingly complicated country gentlewoman and, unbeknownst to him, his heart had already been lost to her fine eyes, and fine wit. As of the moment, he only felt infinitely curious to discover more of Miss Elizabeth's strong opinions, and a wish to marvel at her refusal to defer them to himself.
"Indeed, if that is the case Mr Darcy, would you prefer I leave you in peace as Oakham Mount is no new novelty to myself?" she asked rather briskly, annoyed that her plans had been interrupted by the one man she had no desire to think of any longer.
"There is no need. Surely two people can occupy a hill such as this without disturbing the other's peace." he hoped she could see the slight upturning of his lips, and realise he was but trying to be friendly.
"I suppose it is so. If you do not mind, I intend to continue my reading, as you see." She removed the novel from its hiding place and displayed its cover to the gentleman. "I assume this is not one of those books you were so adamant accomplished ladies must read to live up to their title. Quite the opposite I might say." It irked her that his opinion still had an effect on her no matter how desperately she tried to ignore everything about him.
"On the contrary, Georgiana, my sister, used to be quite fond of the author, and many of her works are housed in Pemberley's library," he replied, rather put off by her obvious jab at what he had meant to be a compliment. Why was she so incredibly confusing? He couldn't help but wonder to himself. It seems every attempt I make at civility is to be thrown back in my face, and for the life of me I cannot comprehend the reason for her intense dislike of my person.
"Miss Bennet," he tentatively inquired "I realize you do not like me, rather I would speculate you dislike me quite a lot. Is there any real reason behind this? As far as I know I have been only civil towards yourself and your family, even though their behaviour is quite preposterous at times." this small bit of honesty seemed to open the flood gates, and his train of thought was vocalized with very little filtering, as his frustration with her manner towards him boiled to the surface. "I would like to know what it is I have done to harm you so, when all I truly desired was to be left alone by your often incredulously improper family. Indeed it is quite obvious that all the sense in your family is shared by yourself and your elder sister, no doubt inherited from your father, as Mrs Bennet doesn't seem to have an ounce of sense about her person." this last he very nearly spat out in disdain, and then just as quickly realized how poorly he had spoken. No gentleman would address a woman as he just had, but he could not be utterly mortified as there was truth in all he said.
Elizabeth could no longer control the intense anger she felt at his words. She would tell this man exactly what her opinion of him was, and would not hold back even an ounce of her hatred "Why sir, do you wish me to thank you for your incredible insult to my family just because my sister and I are exempt from it? You call us improper but I have witnessed many of the said first circle of the ton behave in a far more despicable manner. From the moment you arrived in Meryton society you have been nothing but rude, uncivil, and disdainful of its population, and throw about your commentary with that spiteful sister of Mr Bingley's without regard to any individual's feelings. My family may not be the epitome of elegance, but I do love them. I love my mama with all her nerves and embarrassing behaviour, I love Lydia and Kitty despite their silliness, and above all, I love Mary because the only reason for her attention-seeking behaviour is due to my parent's neglect, which I hold against them despite my love for them both." Elizabeth's face had blanched white in her fury, and she now stood toe to toe with the gentleman who seemed to be feeling more uncomfortable with every breath she took to renew her address.
"Furthermore, you dare claim you have been only civil. You dare claim to hold my sister and I in some small esteem. Did you not announce to half the ballroom that I am only 'barely tolerable' sir? Is that the action of a proper gentleman? I dare say it is not." at this it was Darcy's turn to pale. He had no idea that she had heard his careless comment, and now the mortification truly set in. He had insulted her before he even made her acquaintance, and then accused her family of behaving poorly when he himself could not be said to have comported himself in any better manner.
He stuttered, "I truly did not mea-"
"Do not interrupt me, sir, I am far from finished!" she nearly yelled. It seemed the words poured from her mouth of their own accord, and with each sentence she could feel the vindication of at last standing up to this pompous, proud man. "Not only do you treat every last one of us as inferior to yourself, but you have the gall to look poor Mr Wickham in the eye after all you have done to wrong him, and you do so without even the slightest semblance of regret. So do not speak to me of propriety and sense, when all you are is a prideful, selfish man who believes his wealth and connections turn every last one of us into your meek followers. We are not so stupid, and I am no Caroline Bingley to simper at your every word." She stopped abruptly and attempted to catch her breath.
Mr Darcy had looked positively shaken throughout her speech as he realized how ill-mannered he had been up to this point, but his face had taken a cold, angry mien at her mention of Wickham. Though he was furious at the man for deceiving the whole town so well, he realized with shame that his treatment of Elizabeth had made her susceptible to Wickham's lies and he was angered both at his own comportment and that of the man who had very nearly ruined his sister. He saw no course of action other than to tell her the truth and place his happiness and his sister's reputation at her mercy. If he could not improve her opinion of himself, at least she would understand the danger the man posed to herself and her sisters.
As Elizabeth calmed slightly, Mr Darcy addressed her in a subdued tone, "Miss Bennet, I cannot but agree to your assessment of my character thus far. It is true I behaved inexcusably poorly towards the people of the town, but I realize I need to apologize to you personally as well – "
"There is no need for it, as nothing you say can change my opinion of your conceited nature." she interrupted.
Again it dawned on Darcy how poorly he had behaved, indulging Caroline's disdainful nature and spiteful opinions, and making himself, in essence, no better than she. The idea appalled him.
"I insist Eli- Miss Bennet, please, allow me to explain." her silence he took as permission to continue, "I have been raised all my life to hold my name and position in incredibly high esteem. My father accepted nothing less than the best from his children, though he loved us dearly, and Georgiana and I were subject to many lessons on the hierarchy of society, and the standards we were to meet. My mother became incredibly weak after Georgiana was born, and died when she was but 4 years old, and I was 16. After her death my father retreated into himself and I was left with the burden of grieving the loss of my mother while comforting a sister who could barely understand the gravity of the situation." at this, Elizabeth's expression softened, but she was still wary of being deceived by this man of whom she thought nothing but ill.
Darcy continued "I played the role of father to Georgiana from that day forward, and even more so six years later, when my own father passed away. He had loved my mother above all else and never recovered after her death. I was faced with managing a large estate at the early age of 21, and the responsibilities, along with the events of my childhood, moulded my character to an uncanny likeness of my father's; shy, and some even say taciturn."
He paused, closed his eyes and, taking a deep breath as if to steel himself against what was to come, recounted to Elizabeth the complete particulars of his relationship with Wickham, and the events of the previous summer at Ramsgate.
Elizabeth had moved to sit on a dry log at some point during his story, and now gazed sadly at her lap and toyed with the buttons of her pelisse. There could be no doubt of the truthfulness of his story, and although she did not entirely like Mr Darcy, she could no longer truly hate him. Poor, dear Miss Darcy, she thought, as old as Lydia and at an age where you can be so susceptible to the lies told by those around you. Just as I was. How could I have misjudged Mr Darcy's character so? Just as she was about to absolve the gentleman cautiously seated to her right of all wrong, she remembered his comments at the assembly hall. She was about to question him, when Mr Darcy quietly started to speak once more, "I realize it is no excuse for my shameful statements at the assembly, but in all honesty, I had barely noticed you when I made my comments. I said whatever it would take for Bingley to leave me alone. I had not accompanied him here entirely of my own volition, but rather as a favour to a close friend who is seeking to find his place in the world. In my mind I had no patience for match-making mamas and their simpering, sickly sweet daughters hanging about me, so I acted as rude and aloof as possible in the hopes to drive them off. It was not a gentlemanly thing to do, but I cannot take back what I have done, only apologize for it profusely and pray you will forgive me." this was said with no little emotion on Darcy's side. He wanted to further his acquaintance with Miss Elizabeth, even if it did not end as he wished it would.
"Mr Darcy, it seems we were both hasty in our judgment of each other and the people we associate with. Will it not be prudent to begin our acquaintance anew, so that we may part as friends?" Elizabeth had realized how much her prejudice against the man had made her unable to see his true nature and, although she would not say so yet, she was eager to be pleasantly surprised by this now not that conceited, not all that proud, and maybe just the slightest bit handsome, man who seemed to share many of her interests. She would do her best to make up for her misjudgment of his character by improving the opinion of the Meryton residents towards him, and perhaps help him, even if only slightly, to understand his sister's feelings, as she had more than ample practice dealing with 15-year-old girls in her lifetime.
"There is nothing I would appreciate more." said he, with the slightest hint of a smile making his eyes seem just a bit brighter.
It had been more than an hour since the start of their conversation and, with a jolt, Elizabeth realized her absence would be noted today more than any other, as they were to attend Mr Bingley's ball at Netherfield that evening.
In a great rush she bid Mr Darcy goodbye, adding that she would see him at the ball, and shoved her bonnet over her unruly curls. Not bothering to fasten it beneath her chin she grabbed her unread book, and with some haste stood up from the log, brushed off her pelisse, and turned to leave.
"Miss Bennet!" Mr Darcy interrupted her retreat. She swung around and asked cheekily whether, as he was so willing to delay her return to Longbourn, he would like to deal with her mother's "nerves and palpitations" in her stead.
With a delighted grin, showing off two terribly endearing dimples, he countered, "I would happily endure all her nerves and palpitations if you would grant me the first, and supper sets at the ball tonight."
"Why Mr Darcy, I thought you hated dancing?" she teased, as she arched her eyebrow ever so slightly.
Good heavens, has she always been so beautiful? thought Mr Darcy. He was so lost in her crooked smile and sparkling brown eyes that he forgot to answer her question and had to ask Elizabeth to repeat herself. She did so and tried to control her mirth at the haughty Mr Darcy staring at her quite idiotically.
"I assure you, madam, I enjoy dancing but only when I do so with a witty, and uncommonly beautiful partner."
At this Elizabeth's cheeks turned decidedly red. "Why sir, no wonder you never dance as that is quite a high standard to which you hold your partners! Nonetheless, I will be delighted to gain my amusement from your discomfort and so I accept your request," she said with a humorous smile. At that, she lifted her skirts ever so slightly and sped wildly down the hill.
Darcy watched her disappear in the direction of Longbourn and smiled to himself. I don't quite know why this woman affects me so, but I intend to find out, he thought as he untied Gaius from the log to which he had secured the mighty beast. "Well Gaius! That was indeed a morning well spent." He addressed the animal as he mounted and took off on the path to Netherfield. For the first time in what felt like forever, he was looking forward to a ball.
A/N: Well hi there! I'm new to WRITING in the FF world, but I got a teeny bit addicted to JAFF (can ya blame me?) and decided the only way I could cure it is by writing my own story, where all the characters end up exactly as I always wanted them to (selfish, amiright?). Anyhooooo, some characters will be a bit OOC; Lydia is more silly than she is rebellious, and Darcy and Lizzy are a bit more sensible and talk things out way earlier, as you may see. Also, I'm making Bingley even MORE amiable than he was in the book (impossible? I think not), and Caroline gets what's coming in the most deliciously absurd way possible. Hold onto your hats folks, this is gonna be one hell of a ride!
Cheerio! Sammy ;)
