This fic was written as a gift to my beloved friend kahluchesi, who loves Rizzles and Shakira. I've never written a Rizzles before, but she said it's good enough, so I'm posting it here and dedicating this fic to her.
"Estoy yo tras tu
Experiencia de vivir
Y siempre tu fuerza que me guía
Aliviaste mis heridas
Y el empuje de tu amor
Me da el valor
Mi alma
Nadie la conoce tanto como tu"
Shakira
Angela Rizzoli has always been a mother hem. Her three kids are the love of her life, the things she's most proud of. Every time she was pregnant, she would spend hours thinking about who they would become. Her mind would always go far, far away and she would think about going to their graduations, weddings and the birth of her grandchildren. The belief that by the age of thirty her sons and daughter would already be married with children is something that makes her laugh until this day. Not even her marriage has lasted enough to see it happen, how could she expect that her own children would find true love so easily?
Destiny plays tricks, the things you want are not the things you need. She now knows that sometimes the surprise of not getting what you want is the beauty of life, following a script is no fun at all. She has taken long enough to see this and it almost cost her relationship with her precious daughter. She would always pressure Jane to be more like her; to be more feminine, to learn how to cook, to go out on dates, to pursue true love and marriage and kids like she did when she was younger. But it would only make Jane angry. Nowadays she wonders if maybe her daughter has never been angry at her, only frustrated for not being what her mother wanted her to be.
Today, Angela is particularly nostalgic about things, looking at pictures of her daughter as a baby and tearing up. Because today her daughter is finally making Angela's dreams come true, her little baby is getting married. And it's not the way Angela has planned; it won't happen on a church or have a big party after, and the groom is another bride, but the happy smile on Jane's face is everything she needs to know that her daughter is going to be happy, which really is all that matters in the end.
"Ma!" Jane calls. They're no far, but Jane has to almost yell to make her mother stop daydreaming.
"Yes, Jane?"
"Are you- Are you mad at me?" Jane's eyes are on the floor, staring at it as if it's the most interesting thing in the room.
"Mad? What did you do, Jane? Did you rip you dress again?!"
"No, Ma, the dress is fine." Jane looks up rolling her eyes, an action she has perfected over the years. "About me marrying Maura. I know you wanted... Wanted other things for me."
It's the first time Jane brings the subject and it makes Angela wonder for how long she has been debating with herself about it, too scared to deal with any kind of rejection that she had choose to not even make possible for people to reject. Angela remembers when she first told her that she and Maura were dating. She said it with conviction, the look on her eyes daring her to say anything against it. So different from the fragile look on her face now, the concealed fear in her eyes.
"All I ever want is for you to be happy, sweetheart." She comes near her daughter, touching her cheek. "If Maura is your happiness, then I'm happy you two found each other."
"She is, ma. She really is." A smile spreads across both women's faces.
Later, after the standard vows have been changed between Dr. Maura Dorothea Isles and detective Jane Clementine Rizzoli, they go to their usual place to celebrate, Korsak's bar. The place is closed for their party, where the Rizzoli family and friends are all there, just like some members of Maura's complex family as well.
"Toast!" Frank yells at everybody and no one at the same time, drunker than he should be, soon being followed by other guests who start to shout the word.
"Well, I'd like to start." Angela says, positioning herself in front of Maura and Jane, who interlace their fingers and hold their breaths without thinking.
"Maura, you've been a friend to me in more ways that I can count. You helped me when no one else could and every day you keep showing to me how big of a heart you have. So you didn't have to marry Jane to become part of this family because you already are family to me. But I'm glad you did. Because now I have two wonderful daughters to cherish."
"And nag." Jane completes.
"Will you let me finish?" Angela fakes annoyance and people laugh, drunk from happiness and liquor.
"Nobody knows my Jane like you do, not even me. You treat her with such love and devotion. And nothing makes a mother happier than to see their kids being loved like this. There's not enough I can say to thank you. So I'll just say it: Thank you, Maura, for everything you've done and you'll do. I hope Jane can make you as happy as you make her."
Angela and Maura hug each other. Angela is repeating the words 'thank you' close to Maura's ear, trying very hard not to break down and cry, and failing miserably. Maura assures Angela that she'll take good care of her wife and that Jane already makes her more happy she ever thought she could be.
"Now Jane," Angela says after a few minutes trying to recompose herself.
"Between my three kids, you're by far the strongest one. You never really needed me for anything. You'd break an arm and you wouldn't cry or ask for my help. You'd have a difficult test and wouldn't tell me about it until it was done. You face the worst of mankind every day and never comes to me, to cry on my shoulders. You're so self-sufficient that I thought you'd never find someone because you truly don't need anyone, you can do anything you set your mind to. It used to scare me, to think about you being alone for the rest of your life."
Angela has to hold back some tears thinking about how she used to lay on her bed worrying about the future of her kids, worried that Jane would get herself killed being a cop. That she'd die before even having experienced love.
"Then Maura came in your life. Suddenly you couldn't be alone anymore. You'd trust her enough to solve cases with you, to share personal things, to introduce her to your family, to go cry on her shoulders when you needed a break from being the stoic detective Jane Rizzoli. So you asked me If I was mad at you for things not being exactly as I wanted them to be, and let me tell you something Jane: things are better than I ever dreamt they could be. The two of you are part of each other's life stories and you make it a better story by sharing it. And my life is better because I have both of you."
She can no longer hold back her tears and Jane hugs her, stronger than ever before, trying to fix everything and take away all of her mother's fears with it. Jane starts to cry as well, hiding her face in Angela's shoulder. Although Angela knows that her daughter doesn't need her as much as she never has needed before, she's glad that Jane found someone that she's willing to need for the rest of her life. That she's no longer alone in this life. That she has someone to cure her wounds. To wipe the tears from her eyes. To hold her hand in the worst moments. To share her smiles and jokes. To give courage in moments of weakness. To allow her to accept that she's afraid. To not only guide but to be there by her side for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health. Just like Angela have always been there for her.
She smiles as love and pride take over her motherly heart.
Translation*:
"I follow your
Life experience
And your strength always guides me
Relieves my wounds
And the impulse of your love
Gives me courage
My soul
Nobody knows it as much as you do"
*I don't speak Spanish and this translation might not be completely accurate.
