Four years, two months, twelve days
Quil
It's been four years. Four years, two months, and twelve days since Claire left for college.
It's not like I expected her to stay or anything, she didn't have any reason to. She had no idea about how I felt about her, about how I was connected to her, about the pack, the wolves, vampires, nothing. As far as she knew, her life was a hell of a lot simpler than it actually was, a hell of a lot more normal.
I never told her about imprinting… I know I should have. She is going to be pissed when I actually do… if I ever do.
I never could bring myself to, even when the rest of the pack, when Emily and Sam were pressuring me. It just didn't feel right; like I was forcing something on her that she has absolutely no say in. I just didn't want her to feel she had to love me, was that so difficult?
So now she's gonna be home in a week, and I really don't know what to expect. Is she going to come home all grown up and not want to have to do anything with me? She couldn't have changed that much in four years?
Maybe. Hopefully.
** ** **
"Quil, you know you can't hide out here like you have been when Claire gets back; she's gonna want to see you, man."
Every time Claire came to visit La Push, I was always 'conveniently' out of town, or working. Sadly, I couldn't use those excuses when she was home for good, unless I didn't want to pass for still living on the reservation. Damn.
"Well, maybe she won't. We don't know what she's like anymore, do we?"
"Don't think like that, Quil. You know she misses you, it's been four years."
"Just keep thinking that, Jake." I mimicked, in a not so kind voice.
But Jacob was right. She did want to see me. For the first week I tried my damned hardest to make sure I didn't have opportunities to see her, and when I did, I'd fill these times up with extra patrols and more shifts at work than usual. The rest of the time was spent at home. I did miss her, a lot. But I just didn't want to see her. The pain I felt from not seeing her was easier to manage when I wasn't around her for a longer amount of time – I began to forget things about her.
During one time at home, the doorbell rung. Thinking it was just the pizza I'd ordered from Port Angeles, I went to answer it, not bothering to check whom it actually was.
"Hi Quil."
Oh crap. Oh crap oh crap oh crap. She looked way pissed.
This definitely wasn't the girl just out of high school that I'd last seen. But I couldn't have actually expected her to be exactly the same? Apparently, I did.
"Um, Claire. I wasn't expecting you." I said, gesturing to the ratty clothes I was wearing.
"Yeah, well. When I didn't see you when I first got back, I thought you were working so I was just like, sure, that's okay. But then I didn't hear from you all week. So I thought I'd come visit."
She still had the same mannerisms as she did before, give or take. But she spoke differently, and held herself differently. She was a little taller, and she'd cut her hair shorter, from its length where it was at her waist four years ago.
"Yeah, sorry about that. I've been… busy."
"All week, Quil? Really? You couldn't have come and seen me after work one day?"
"Like, I said, busy."
"Right." I could tell she wasn't buying it, especially since I wasn't inviting her in. Truthfully, I felt a little annoyed at her for leaving me.
"Well, aren't you going to invite me in?" She was becoming impatient. Good old Claire.
" I spose," I said, gesturing her into the hallway. "So, you cut your hair?"
"Yeah, when I first started college, Quil. You would have known that if you were around when I came to visit. Where were you all those times I came to visit, Quil?" She was all business; practically interrogating me.
" Like, I said, I was working, or I went to visit some friends in Seattle."
"Oh yeah? What are their names?" Claire said while fiddling with a pen.
"Um… George and Penny."
"How come I've never heard of them before?"
"What? You expect me to tell you about every single person I've ever met in my life, Claire? Why don't you just attach yourself to my hip and follow me everywhere? Or better yet, why didn't you just have not ever left for college? Then you could of met everyone and seen everything I did during the time you would have been away!" I was feeling spiteful now.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"I dunno, Claire. What do you think it means?"
"Quil! Why are you being so damn cryptic? First, You didn't see me at all the entire time I was at college, even when I came back to visit, then you avoided me all last week! What's going on, Quil?"
"For Christs sake, nothing. It doesn't even matter."
"Yes, it clearly does, Quil. You just made a huge fuss. That's really not like you."
"Yeah, well, I didn't think it was like you to leave me for four years. Don't you think it bothered me, Claire?"
"I left everyone else for four years, you know. What makes you so freaking special?"
Argh. I was really stuck now.
"Dammit, Quil! Why wont you just tell me? You know I know something's going on."
" I can't." I mumbled.
"You what?" If looks could kill…
"I can't"
"WHY?"
I looked down at my knees. "Because it's not fair to you, Claire. You want to know now, but when I tell you, you'll want me to take it back. You'll wish you didn't know."
I didn't look up until I heard the front door slam.
Claire had never intimidated me before.
** ** **
A/N: So. What do you think? Continue? I'm working on the second chapter at the moment, so hopefully it will be up in the next few days, provided the story gets some hits and maybe some reviews. Criticism is good :) And also, do I need a beta?
- caaitib :)
