Hey guys! I just posted another one shot, I know, but I had this idea in my head for while, too. So I figured, why not?
Reviews are always nice and greatly appreciated :) Be honest, if you didn't like the story, I'll understand. I don't pretend to be a writer... I just have a lot of feels from all these new Degrassi promos and needed a way to assuage those feels.
Thanks for reading! :)
His footsteps echoed down the abandoned hallway. He choked back a few empty sobs and wiped haphazardly at his falling tears. A sense of urgency wrapped itself around his body and he felt himself start to panic-as if it were possible to be anymore panicked than he already was. He had to do something, anything, to make it all stop.
He scrambled to find an empty classroom or a janitor's closet to hide out in. Who was he kidding, all of the rooms around him were empty. All he had to do was choose one, push the door open, and have yet another anxiety attack while praying no one would barge in. It wasn't enough though. Not anymore.
He needed a more permanent solution. Permanent. The word reverberated in his mind. That single word put Cam at ease and gave him a sense of calm that he hadn't felt in years. Quietly and between his frantic breaths Cam repeated that word over and over again. Permanent.
He scrambled to the only place he knew no one would look, the one place he could find his permanent solution. As he pushed open the door to the utility room he saw them. The stairs to his freedom, the stairs to his release.
He quickly bounded up them taking them two at a time, suddenly desperate for his permanent fix. Gripping onto the bar attached to the door labeled "ROOFTOP", he took a deep breath before harshly slamming it open.
The chilly spring air enveloped him at once as the bright morning sun blinded him.
From somewhere far off into the distance, Cam heard his name being called out echoing just as his footsteps had. He recognized the voice as Dallas and at once grew disappointed that it wasn't Her voice resounding through the halls.
Oh well. Dallas, his team, Her, they were all behind him now. They could do nothing to stop him. Not like they would anyway. There was no one to stop him from obtaining his permanent solution, the solution he so desperately needed.
Looking out into the parking lot he pictured himself becoming one with the cement. He would blend into the earth and hopefully find more solace in the afterlife than he had while living.
Living. Was he even living? Was he even alive? He felt like he was cheating at life. It seemed to come so natural to everyone else but he just couldn't grasp the concept. Half the time he felt completely and utterly dead inside and the other half he struggled-and failed-to find some semblance of happiness.
His time spent singing stupid karaoke songs with Her, cuddling on the couch with Her, watching Her command the stage as she sang at one of her WhisperHug gigs, those were the times he felt most alive and now he had nothing more to look forward to. She had been the reason he was still alive but She was also responsible for killing him.
When he heard those words, "Cam, I'm sorry. I just, I can't do this anymore", he knew she had succeeded in quieting the beating of his heart. With that final goodbye Cam knew he had nothing left to live for, or rather nothing left to pretend to live for.
"CAM!" He was pulled from his thoughts by the voice calling out his name and this time he could tell that it was getting closer. He had to make a decision.
His feet seemed to be on autopilot as they carried him to the edge of the building. He knew what he had to do. It was now or never.
Taking another breath and closing his eyes, he started to lean ever so slightly and let his mind wander one more time. These were his last moments on earth, he figured he could at least take his time with them.
In the next second, though, he heard the frantic sounds of feet climbing the same stairs he has ascended just moments before and panic soon began to set in.
Just as the door was being pushed open and a begging cry escaped his captain's lips, Cam pushed himself over the edge of the building.
For a second it seemed as though time stopped. There was something clenching at his heart. Worry. Leave it to Cam to have an anxiety attack while falling to his own death.
Flying through the air, he tried to contort his body as to soften the blow that was nothing if not inevitable.
In the split second before his body hit the pavement, his worry subsided and a sense of acceptance washed over Cam as he realized it was all over. He would finally get his permanent solution.
As his body collided with the blacktop, legs first, a painful stabbing sensation coursed through Cam's body and his mind looped his comfort word over and over again to subside the panic. Permanent. Permanent. Permanent. It would all be over soon.
But as he lay there, his eyes open ever so slightly unable to move any part of his mangled body, he watched as the world around him blurred together. He heard what seemed to be distant calls of distress and sensed the close proximity of somebody next to him.
It hadn't worked. He felt the rage and the anguish he was feeling blend together and surge through his body. It hadn't worked. How couldn't it have worked?
Slowly he closed his eyes, his thoughts beginning to jumble. His body felt as though it were on fire from the immeasurable amount of pain that stabbed at every inch of his being. His senses took turns fading in and out.
Just as his hearing became nothing more than a minimal buzz in his ears, his sight regained control and his opened his eyes with an impeccable sense of caution.
And there he saw Her. Leaning over his immobile body on all fours. Her blonde hair shone in the sunlight and the wind swept it so that it blew over her shoulders. He could barely make out her features but he knew she was still the most beautiful girl he had ever seen, even in her frenzied state. He distantly felt a teardrop escape her eye and fall squarely on his cheek. More than anything he wanted to reach up and wipe away her tears, tell her that everything would be okay, and pretend that it wasn't him that had hurt her.
Unable to comprehend anymore around him, he closed his eyes once more letting the pain regain control of him.
How could this have happened? He jumped from the roof for god's sake. He hit the pavement with a loud thud that still resounded in his ears and vibrated throughout his chest. Was this some kind of joke? He was supposed to be dead right now. He needed to be dead right now.
And that's when it hit him. He had gotten what he wanted after all. The Campbell Saunders that he was before was irrevocably dead and the life he would have forever more would be like nothing he had ever experienced.
He had gotten his permanent solution.
I know, I know, the chances of jumping from a roof and living are pretty slim. But I figured if John Locke (LOST) can get pushed out of a window and still be alive, then why can't Cam?
