Holmes and Watson walked into House's office to discover House eating Holmes lunch and Wilson pestering him about the fact it wasn't very nice to eat other people's lunch. House was looking slightly amused by his feeble argument.
"Shut up or I'll eat yours to" snapped House who was no longer amused by the pestering. Wilson was about to retaliate but then he spotted Holmes and Watson, his face turned pale, strong as House and Holmes friendship was (although they wouldn't admit it) he was scared at how Holmes would react. Unsure what to do he hovered awkwardly around House trying to avoid Holmes glare.
"Dr House?" Both Watson and Wilson groaned, formal speak, there was going to be a war alright. House chose to ignore Holmes and instead asked Wilson to dispose of the foil that had been wrapped around the sandwiches, although Wilson was normally quite tolerant of House, in his agitated state he just exploded,
"No! No I won't House! I'm not your bloody slave!" he yelled, House looked shocked for a moment but then a quizzical look slid onto his face,
"Odd I thought commoners were supposed to act as slaves to those higher up then them?"
That was it, if Wilson hadn't lost it before he certainly lost it now, he punched House, sending him flying off his chair before storming out of the office muttering something about bastards, but no one could quite catch it.
Holmes smiled for a moment before turning to Watson.
"You better go after him" Watson was immediately suspicious, he had an odd feeling he was wanted out of the room so that the two theorists could have a good long 'debate'
"Why?"
"Well your good at all that emotional crap aren't you" Muttered House as he emerged from behind his desk looking rather disgruntled. Watson shot him a particularly evil glare before turning on his heel and running out the door, in the direction that Wilson had gone.
All was silent in the room until Holmes broke it
"How dare you speak to Watson like that!"
"How dare you put mayonnaise in a ham sandwich?!" retorted House. The two men went back to glaring at each other, the testerone was heavy in the air and you could feel the oncoming fight, this time it was House that broke the silence
"You use Watson"
"You abuse Wilson"
"You can't drive"
"You can't say one thing without it being sarcastic, sadistic, nasty or twisted"
"Bastard"
"Idiot"
"Maniac"
"Sadistic"
"weirdo"
"Git"
"Unfeeling git"
"Twisted unfeeling git"
"Deranged, twisted unfeeling git"
"Bollocks, your just saying that 'cause you feel like a rabbit caught in the headlights"
"Really?"
"Really! you sad idiotic manic depressive drug addicted fairy!"
This last sentence shocked House, he really hadn't thought such words could come out of Holmes mouth, were the heck did he learn that?! And, fairy?! Moment of confusion over House opened his mouth to retaliate but was interrupted by an explosion of laughter, both House and Holmes looked over to the source of the disturbance to discover, Watson, Wilson, Thirteen, Cuddy, Foreman, Kutner, Taub, Chaise and Cameron, standing in the doorway, they had heard everything.
House looked at Holmes, and said
"truce?"
"truce" agreed Holmes and they both turned to look at everyone smiling, evilly.
"Run?" asked Wilson
"run" agreed Watson and all of them shot down the corridor followed by the two laughing theorists.
