CWG: as we all know I'm obsessed with torturing Kai. (Sigh) I was listening to my Ipod when I got this idea. So yeah, expect it to be semi-depressing…

DISCLAIMER: I DON'T OWN BEYBLADE! ALL I OWN IS MY IPOD! (Grins)

Enjoy…

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The smell of alcohol lingered through the seemingly abandoned apartment. Kai Hiwatari was lying on the floor facing the ceiling with a crooked grin planted on his features. His Crimson eyes were blank and any idiot could see he had been crying.

The phone rang urgently for the fifteenth time that day as his teammates tried desperately to get in contact with the blue haired captain. Kai didn't even seem to notice the sound but the grin left his face. He sat up reluctantly as her voice pierced the air around him.

"Kai? Where are you? Please answer the phone," he could hear her sigh into the phone before continuing, "Fine. You obviously don't want anything to do with us so after today I'll leave you alone…" Kai glanced at the phone curiously. What had she meant by 'after today'? He ran a cold hand through his matted hair and realized how long it had been since he last ran a comb through it.

Kai sighed as he stood up and walked over towards the bathroom. He looked in the mirror but wasn't able to recognize the person staring back at him. His reflection seemed dead. The face paint had been smeared away from the tears he had shed, he wasn't wearing a shirt and the scars on his body were exposed to the world for once. He heard a strange noise and spun around. When he realized the noise had come from himself he felt extremely stupid.

"Now I'm beginning to sound like Tyson…" he muttered grimly. His crimson eyes widened at the sound of his voice. 'Do I really sound like that?' he thought to himself. His once powerful and confident voice was now cracked and broken. He tried to swallow some faucet water to help his throat but found himself choking on the liquid.

"So this is what withdrawal feels like…" he muttered again as he stared at an empty bottle at his feet. His hands itched to grab the bottle and empty its contents but he knew it wouldn't be worth the effort. To prove his curiosity Kai lifted the bottle and shook it. When he realized it was empty he carelessly threw the bottle away. The bottle, he noticed through his blurred vision, was a bottle of Demerol. Unfortunately no amount of the pills could get her out of his mind.

Her laughter echoed painfully through his ears causing him to cringe. Her mahogany eyes seemed to haunt Kai's dreams and every time he attempted to turn the television on he was haunted with her image. He walked out of the bathroom and into the kitchen. As he looked around he couldn't find anything appetizing in his kitchen.

His eyes stared at some left over lasagna and though he once loved the taste of the pasta he found himself feeling sick. He looked around again from pizza to fruits and vegetables. Like every other time Kai found he was picking up another bottle of Budweiser. Opening the bottle Kai realized he was chugging yet another beer. His body seemed to twitch all over from the liquid but he ignored it.

He dropped the bottle as his legs gave out from under his weight. He coughed up the liquid and felt tears stinging his eyes. 'Hilary…' Kai's eyes widened as he recognized the name.

"Are you sure it's okay to just come see him…don't you think he needs some time alone?" a voice asked from outside in the hall. Kai's gaze shifted from the floor to stare at the door. He waited patiently as the footsteps approached.

"I don't care. He hasn't returned any of our calls and I'm positive he is home." Kai recognized this new voice as a girl's. Kai held his breath as he waited, hoping that they'd just leave.

Before, he could have died just to hear her voice, but now it seemed as though her voice was even more poisonous than the pills and alcohol combined. 'Hilary…' he thought to himself again as his eyes filled with tears.

A faint knock could be heard on the apartment door but Kai ignored it. Not just because he couldn't stand but because he knew he wouldn't be able to face those eyes.

'Kai!" Hilary's voice called out as she banged on the door. He stared at the door before realizing his tears had betrayed him. "Kai!" Hilary's voice seemed to be mixed with concern this time. 'why is she so worried…how does she even know I'm here!' Kai thought.

It was then that he heard a noise. It seemed like a sound that could be heard around the world. 'What is that noise!' he asked himself before feeling his body shake violently.

"KAI!" Hilary and another voice yelled, Ray, he thought. Kai closed his eyes as he noticed the noise was coming from him. He was shaking from not only the different chemicals but from his own crying. 'How stupid of me…' he thought. This time he heard the two voices yelling while the banging sound became a more crashing sound.

Kai looked up in desperation as two blurred figures ran into the room. They couldn't see him from where he was couched over but he could see them. Hilary almost tripped over one of the stray bottles on the floor and both of them were covering their noses in disgust from the alcohol. Ray stepped carefully around different piles of trash and pointless things that had been left alone in search for their captain. Kai shifted away from them and instantly held his breath to stop from shaking. He could hear Hilary whimper silently as she searched.

'Why did this have to happen? Why couldn't she just leave? I did this so I wouldn't hurt her anymore. If I didn't exist she wouldn't have to be in pain.' Kai thought as he leaned against the cabinets. While trying to clear his mind of every feeling that seemed to engulf him at that moment Kai could hear Ray gasp.

"Hilary, don't come in here…" he started but it was too late. Kai's heart sunk as he heard her whimpers become louder. He tried to think of what to do. They had obviously found something that probably looked like a dead body in the dark. At that moment Kai would've liked to get up and shout at them or something, but he couldn't even move his toes.

"Kai?" Ray asked into the dark. The real Kai wanted to laugh or at least call out but his voice seemed to die with every second that passed.

"Kai…" the sound of Ray's footsteps reached the Russian's ears before the boy spoke again, "Hilary, it's okay. It's not him. It's just a pile of clothes." Ray seemed to state not only so Hilary could hear but so he could convince himself as well.

"Kai, where are you?" Hilary whispered as she leaned against the counter in the kitchen. Kai could see her figure through his blurred vision and his eyes began to sting again. He stopped himself just as the girl sighed.

'This is too much. Just kill me now! Make it quick but let it burn so I can feel my life fade.' He thought to himself as he let a few tears trickle down his pale cheeks. The brunette's breathing was heavy and Kai could tell she was crying as well. He wanted to go and hold her but knew he couldn't bring himself to even speak to her.

'This is all my fault. I am so sorry Hilary…' he thought not even realizing he had whispered her name.

Hilary spun around as she heard the faint sound only to be met with tear stained crimson. "Oh my gosh. Kai." She croaked through her own tears. Kai heard Ray come into the room and saw Hilary running towards the broken figure on the floor.

"Hilary…I'm sorry." Kai tried to whisper as the girl seemed to crush him in her grasp.

Noticing his cracked voice Hilary looked up into his eyes. She could see the color was dead and Kai seemed to be a ghost. "Kai…?" Hilary tried to speak but was cut off by a cold finger hinting at her to be silent. She noticed the boy was shaking violently as he tried to speak. Ray stood nearby watching in horror as his friend seemed to fight his body to stay conscious.

"I'm so sorry Hilary…I tried to get you out of my…mind but it was impossible," Kai stopped to try and calm his body down but they all could see he was clenching his teeth as he spoke, "I'm not strong enough…when I tried to forget you…I tried everything…alcohol…pills…I even tried suicide but it was useless. I went to the roof…and looked down…I couldn't even bring myself to jump…the simplest thing in the world…all I had to do was step forward and it would've been over. Damn it," Kai's voice continued to crack as he spoke but he didn't stop. He glared at the ceiling before looking back into her mahogany eyes, "Laugh at me. Laugh at me and tell me how much of a weakling I am." He stared at Hilary and wiped away a few tears that were rolling down her face.

Hilary stared back at him before speaking. "Who do you think you are? Why would you even think that I would want you dead? Kai you're so stupid. You're so stupid, I love you. I have always loved you. So don't you dare think otherwise." Hilary smiled slightly at the boy.

"Hilary…I…Love you too." Kai managed to whisper and for the first time since he could remember he found himself giving a real, genuine smile. Hilary gasped slightly and realized how beautiful the boy's smile was.

"Kai…" she started but was cut off by the smile fading off his features and a single tear rolling freely down his face. She noticed the Crimson began to fade quicker and the Kai's pale body seemed to calm slightly. Ray gasped before running to the phone.

Hilary stared in shock as the fire in his eyes flickered out and the shaking stopped. He looked at peace and Hilary couldn't help but smile slightly as she heard Ray dialing three numbers into the phone.

"I'll always love you." She whispered into his ear as she leaned into his chest.

She let simple tears fall from her eyes before she heard a faint sound.

BA-DUM

Hilary gasped as she heard the noise again. It was faint but was still there.

"Kai. Ray he's alive! Please hurry, Kai's alive! I hear his heart!" she yelled over to the Chinese boy. Ray stared at the boy on the floor before sighing in relief.

After waiting anxiously for what seemed like an eternity, an ambulance pulled up outside and a few doctors ran into the apartment. They surrounded Kai and escorted Hilary and Ray out of the room. The two watched helplessly as their friend's stomach was pumped and his crimson eyes shot open in pain as he gagged on a tube. Hilary turned to Ray and hid in his arm while Ray looked away.

After an hour or so Kai was being placed on a stretcher and rushed out of the room. Though his eyes still seemed dead, he stared over at Hilary as they passed by. He reached out slightly causing the doctors to stop. They looked towards where he was reaching for to see Hilary crying. Within seconds Hilary found herself in the ambulance with the boy.

She was still crying as they dragged his body into the hospital and made her wait in the waiting room with a nurse. She found herself crying herself to sleep as she thought of Kai.

She was still sleeping when Kai, though escorted by another nurse, was able to go see her. He shook the sleeping brunette awake and stared into her groggy eyes. She released a gasp of surprise and relief as she threw her arms around the boy.

"KAI!" she called out happily as she cried into his chest.

"Shh. Hil, it's alright." He whispered into her ear. She realized his voice was back to normal and after looking up into his eyes she saw the fire burning bright. He still seemed weak but otherwise back to his perfect old self.

"I thought I was going to loose you." Hilary choked out through her tears.

"I'm sorry. Hilary, I promise I'm not going anywhere unless you want me to." He assured the brunette. He smiled at her to prove his word and Hilary couldn't help but smile back.

"You bet you're not going anywhere. I'm not letting you out of my sight." She muttered determinedly. Kai chuckled at her words before kissing the girl on her forehead lightly.

"I love you Kai." She whispered.

"I love you too, Hilary. I really do." Kai whispered back and Hilary could see in his eyes he meant it.

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CWG: So all in all it was a happy ending. Yes that's right be surprised. (smiles) I was getting a little annoyed with the idea of Kai dying in this story…so I kind of changed it last minute…(hehe) so what'd you think?