Title: Lovely, Lovely, Little Nanao

Description: Shunsui reflects on Nanao, what it is that draws him to her, why he keeps trying, and the times she hasn't hit him with her book.

Characters: Shunsui Kyouraku, Nanao Ise

Disclaimer: I do not own any part of Bleach its characters or its events. They belong to Kubo Tite.

Published: 2/17/09

Edited: 9/2/13 – spelling and grammar, no major changes


Lovely, Lovely, Little Nanao

I remember the day she came looking for Lisa. Lisa-chan usually read to the then youngest member of our squad on the first day of every month. I'm not entirely sure how that relationship was started, but one thing was clear. Nanao looked forward to each and every time Lisa read to her, and Lisa-chan always made sure to arrange her schedule to allow time for the little bit of harmless fun.

But that day I had sent my Lisa-chan off in place of Tessai Tsukabishi, then head of the Kidoushuu. We had reason to suspect that someone was attacking soul reapers. It was my belief that Lisa could handle herself, and I knew we couldn't afford to lose Tessai should something go wrong.

When Lisa didn't show for their meeting tiny little Nanao came looking for her. I met her on the pathway looking a bit lost. Nanao was surprised that I remembered her name, but then I have always had a head for names. Tiny Nanao-chan standing there holding her overly large book in her hands looking up at me saying she was honored that I remembered her. I explained that Lisa-chan wasn't around due to work. I never stated what type of work, only that I was sure she would be back tomorrow. I was a fool.

I offered to read with Nanao myself, there was little chance I was going to get any sleep. Nanao declined. She said she would wait for Lisa. Lisa . . . did not return.

-:-

I remember the day Sado came. Nanao-chan was standing, watching out the window. She was now my vice-captain. She had been for some time. The thirteen court guard squads were in chaos. Most of squad eleven were in the fourth squad's hospital, Old Man Yama had ordered the captains to deal with things. He didn't want any more lower level soul reapers injured. That was fine by me. The fewer casualties the better, though I honestly didn't want to kill anyone. Where was I?

Oh yes. Nanao was standing by the window, a large book under one arm, trying not to let me see she was worried. I was sprawled out on the floor, hat covering my eyes, sake close at hand. Nanao would hit me if she heard me say it, she has little tolerance for such things, but I was admiring the view. Nanao-chan had grown from that tiny little girl, into a sleek and graceful woman. She was still bookish, probably more than Lisa-chan had ever been, but their taste differed. I hoped Nanao would never learn exactly what Lisa's taste had been when it came to books. Nanao-chan has infinitely more taste then that, something I admire about her, and something she hates about me. It's a trait that Lisa and I share.

She was alarmed when she heard I was going to go fight Sado, of course we didn't know that was his name then. Worry for me perhaps? I hoped so. Nanao offered to fight him herself. That was something I couldn't allow. Not just because it was Old Man Yama's order and not because I didn't think she could handle herself, in spite of what had happened to squad eleven. No I couldn't allow it because if she was hurt in some way, and I had allowed it, I never would have forgiven myself.

I tried to tell her that, but unfortunately I never could be very serious, even if I'm completely sincere, people always end up thinking I'm joking. She slapped my hand with her fan as I tried to place it on her shoulder. She got the point though, and yelled at me to 'just go.' She also scolded me for calling her mine, but Nanao-chan was mine, whether she realized it or not. She always would be.

I called her on the worry. She seemed slightly surprised that I could tell, but by then she had been my vice-captain long enough that I had learned what every expression meant. Of course I ruined the whole thing a moment later by asking Nanao to shower me with flower petals when I made my entrance. She glared at me but consented.

I could tell she wasn't happy with the job by the way she ignored me when I told her it was ok to stop. She rained the petals down around my head while I made my introduction and even after I yelled up at her. It wasn't until I started calling up complements that she stopped, and by stopped I mean dumped the entire basket on my head. Nanao has a very good aim.

I fought Sado, didn't enjoy it, but I fought him anyway. His last attack was impressive, strong enough to make me worry that Nanao had been in the way. I'd kept half an eye on her the whole time, even saw the messenger when he arrived, but dodging Sado's attack required the whole of my attention. The worry for Nanao lasted bare seconds however.

She came running out of the dust saying something about an urgent notice. She was highly agitated, even to the point of offering to finish the job. I understood when I heard the message. And I knew she would do as she had suggested if I let her. That's something else I admire about Nanao. She always does exactly as she says she will, no matter how much she might end up hurt in the long run. I think I confused her when I told her no, but then the news of Aizen's death may have already done that. She wasn't herself, at the very least, however much she may have tried to hide it. I knew that the moment she let me touch her wrist. But she took my direction. At the moment that was what mattered. By the time I managed to check back in with her, everything was back to normal, as much as it could be in that situation anyway.

-:-

It wasn't long after, a very short time before Rukia Kuchiki's schedule execution in fact, that Nanao found me on the roof lying in the sun, chewing on a weed. She had apparently been looking everywhere for, me, but as long as we had been working together the roof should have been the first place she looked. Perhaps she wanted to give me more time to think, without appearing lazy herself. Whatever the reason I was grateful for the time. It had allowed me to reach a very important decision.

I wanted her opinion, valued her opinion, so I started to ask. Instead of berating me for lying around she grew quiet. One look at that thoughtful expression on her face and I'm afraid I lost my nerve. There was no way I was going to drag Nanao-chan into what I was about to do. No matter how I would have liked her advice, the less she knew the better.

I changed the question to ask about the weed I was chewing, claimed I couldn't feel anything in my mouth because of it. Nanao threw a fit and tore it out from between my teeth, yelling at me to get rid of it.

She started to walk away then, and unable to stick to my earlier decision regarding not dragging Nanao-chan into anything, I asked anyway. And then, Nanao proved exactly how well she knew me. She told me not to ask, that whatever she said I would just go ahead and do what I had already planned. She told me that she would follow at a distance so she couldn't get dragged in. That was my Nanao, able to take care of herself and me in just a few simple words.

I couldn't resist teasing her, accusing her of abandoning me to be scolded by Old Man Yama. I think she knew that I wanted to thank her, but all I could do was joke.

-:-

Sometime later Nanao stood patiently beside me through the start of Rukia's execution. My own mind was racing, thinking, so that I nearly missed not only Byakuya's arrival, but Rukia's request to let the intruders go free. More importantly I was worried about the location of Juushirou Ukitake, my fellow captain and best friend. Yet Nanao-chan stood patiently beside me.

I looked over at her as Rukia rose through the air, and in a brief instant I saw Nanao's serene mask slip. Painted plain across her lovely face was a look of pain and sorrow. I longed to wrap and arm around her, but it was neither the time nor place for such a gesture so I settled for words instead. I suggested she was making me sad too. And instant later the mask was back. But she had already allowed me to see a hidden part of her, and it only confirmed in my mind that she would only approve what Ukitake and I were about to do.

I kept an eye on her as Rukia's execution truly begin with the release of the Soukyoku. The released flaming form was truly terrifying, but Nanao did not budge. I was proud of her. Her earlier slip gave me every indication of what she must be feeling. For once she had let me see what I normally would have had to figure out for myself. Yet still, Nanao stood firm.

I suppose it was lucky for us all that Ichigo Kurosaki turned up when he did. If he hadn't gotten in the way of the Soukyoku all might have been lost. At that point in time Ukitake still hadn't shown up. Kurosaki also provided a decent distraction for Nanao. One question from me about him and she instantly focused on trying to answer it instead of dwelling on her own feelings. That's another thing I admire about Nanao. She doesn't let her own emotions get in the way of the moment.

It wasn't until after the Soukyoku turned for its second attack that Ukitake finally arrived, and with him his two third seats. It seemed that where I was hesitant to drag Nanao into anything he had no such qualms, although knowing his subordinates he may not have had much choice in the matter. Together we managed to stop the Soukyoku with the artifacts of the Shihouin clan we had prepared. Nanao, though I'd made sure she knew nothing of what we were actually doing, took her place alongside me. I was highly pleased when she stayed even when all the other vice-captains ran off after Renji Abarai who was carrying the recently released Rukia. (Ichigo having destroyed the pole that held her)

Things escalated rapidly from there, vice-captains were injured, Old Man Yama got involved, I knew we had to leave before Nanao got dragged in as well as the others who were still standing. I grabbed Ukitake and turning to run, pulled him over the edge of the cliff. Ukitake argued, of course, he never liked to leave anyone in danger. I explained that it was safer, that I could feel someone else on our side coming; I hadn't yet seen Nanao following behind. She caught up with us when we stopped, and though I was pleased with her abilities, I knew I had to keep her out of it. My Nanao-chan would have no chance against Old Man Yama, I prayed she would figure that out before she got hurt. I didn't want her hurt.

The moment the old man decided to start things I knew Nanao would have trouble. She couldn't breathe, couldn't even stand, I would have to work on that with her later, but at that moment my first instinct was to go to her, to comfort her, and to get her away from the battle zone. I never should have allowed her to come. I picked her up and carried her via shunpo to a soft patch of grass quite a ways away. She was brave, my Nanao, but this was a fight she could not take part in.

-:-

The battles ended. Aizen was alive after all. He, Ichimaru, and Tousen betrayed us. In the aftermath I went wandering around the city. It didn't take me long to pass by vice-captains Matsumoto, Kira, and Hisage having a bit of a drinking party. Vice-captain Matsumoto informed me that I wasn't allowed to join because not only would Nanao be angry if I did, but she was looking for me. It was nice to know she worried about me too, my Nanao-chan.

-:-

We had thought we had till winter till the battle between the soul society and Aizen, but all we really had was one month. We had one moth of peace. One month where I could fall asleep on the roof and wake to Nanao's voice. One month where I could sneak sake into the office and get yelled at for it. One month where I could surprise her by actually doing some paperwork. One month to spend in her company before I had to go off to war.

Now I stand, sword raised facing the enemy. I know it won't be easy, but I know I have to survive. I have to survive, so that I can make it back to my Nanao-chan. There are things I want to say, things I intend to make her believe. You see, I love her.