Notes: Hey, just recently gotten through My Hero Acedamia and absolutely loved it! One thing in particular I kinda related to was Bakugo's anger issues. Before I realized I was a Trans Girl, I was a pretty angry person a lot, at least on the inside. So, that got me thinking about a possible Bakugou!Trans-Girl Headcanon! And this fanfic is what resulted.
Warnings: Dysphoria, internalized transphobia, slurs and Bakugo being Bakugo. If any of these are a trigger for you, please put your comfort first before reading.
Also, Bakugo will be referred to He/Him pronouns for most of the fic, as she isn't sure of her identity yet.
Also, this story can be found under the same name on my AO3 account, Hailing Torrent.
*Knock! Knock! Knock!*
"I'd like more pizza!" These words from a leftover dream came out of Kirashima's mouth as he catapulted his body forward. Quickly glancing around the room and out his window, he quickly summed up it was still night-time. His phone's glow displaying 3:00 AM confirmed his suspicion. Rubbing sleep out of his eyes, he began to wonder why he woke up. A repeated knocking on the door reminded him as it caught him off guard, making him nearly fall out of his bed.
Which brought forward the question of who could be knocking on his door at this time of the night? It could be Kaminari, looking to show off some new trick with his costume. This brought a bit of a smile to Kirashima's face. He was happy that his friend was succeeding so much with his progress. This wouldn't be the first time his friend made a point of coming to his room at an ungodly hour. Kaminari was a bit of a night owl, something to do with his quirk he said. The constant electricity going through his body gave him more energy than the average person, letting him stay up for nights on end before getting tired. You would think he would use that time for something productive. The mass amounts of that Kirashima receives from him in the morning says otherwise.
"I'll be there in a sec, Kami." A yawn came out of Kirashima's mouth as he said this, quickly standing up onto his feet. In his Crimson Riot pajamas, the Red-Haired member of Class-1A quickly shuffled over to the door, unlocking it before opening. With the mass amounts of villain attacks lately, you could never be too careful.
And while it wasn't a villain at the door, it was certainly a surprise.
Wide-open eyes. Shaking body. A bloody hand with a large white paper bag being held by it. This was where the initial surprise came from. The second surprise originated from the fact that it was Bakugo standing before Kirashima.
"Bakugo….?" Rubbing his eyes, Kirashima wasn't sure if it was his friend in front of him, or if he was just imagining things.
"Lemme the fuck in!" While it wasn't out of character for Bakugo to say something like this, the emotion in his voice was different. Where it was usually tired disdain for the person he was talking to mixed with a constant sense of anger, now it had panic tinging off the sides of it. Something had spooked Bakugo, and that was no easy task.
Kirishima picked up on the difference in Bakugo's manner, and it momentarily caused him to freeze up.
"Well?!" Bakugo continued, eyes clearly being erratic and frenzied. "You gonna keep standing there like a fucking idiot or what?"
The second time around knock Kirishima out of his shock, making him quickly stand to the side and let his friend in.
Before he entered Kirishima's room, Bakugo quickly looked up each end of the hall. It didn't take a genius to know he was making sure no-one saw him. Seemingly satisfied with was he scouted, Bakugo kept his head down and ran into the room.
Before he could offer his friend a seat, Kirishima found that Bakugo had made his home at the seat next to Kirishima's desk, under his post of Best Jeanist. Hugging the mysterious package he had with him to his chest, this reminded Kirishima of Bakugo's bleeding hand, which was beginning to stain the bag.
"Oh, man, you're hurt." For some reason, this caused Bakugo to wince slightly, like he had been slapped. Kirishima cursed to himself inwardly. Bakugo had a bad tendency to think of any concern as pity. "Here, I got some bandages" Kirishima kneeled down in front of his bed and pulled out a first aid kit he kept there for emergencies.
"Guess this is one." Muttering lowly to himself, Kirishima pulled out a set of All-Might themed bandages. He had different styled ones after the favourite heroes of everyone in the dorm. Seeing Crimson Riot stuff always cheered him up when he was down, so Kirishima hoped the same applied to his friends. Kirishima decided to leave the bandages on the desk near Bakugo. He knew that he would never in a million years let someone try to put on one him.
Bakugo didn't even move as the first aid contents were placed next to him. He just sat there, with his same panicked eyes as he had entered, breathing quickly and worryingly.
It was now starting to freak Kirishima out. Bakguo didn't get scared. Or at least, he never showed it. Kirishima suspected that he was hiding some stuff after what happened with the Villain's League. Some pain or stress over what might have happened. He tried to get his friend to talk about it, but would always end up getting the usual Bakugo shouts and cursing for his trouble.
For a few minutes, they sat in silence. Neither of them seemed to be enjoying it. Kirishima was scared that something was really bothering his friend. While Bakugo….It seemed to be hard pressed for Bakugo to enjoy anything right now.
However, soon his quick breathing began to slow down. It began to calm and relax. Bakugo started to release his iron grip on the paper bag he was so intent on protecting. After a few more minutes, he placed it next to him, but in a way that his foot was firmly clamped down upon it so no-one could take it. Bakugo grabbed the bandages, and wrapped one of them tightly around his wounded hand.
And with that, he got up, taking his bag with him, and made his way to the door.
"Tell anyone about this, and you're fucking dead." A usual Bakugo threat, but like earlier there was something different about it. It lacked the raw fire of his anger. Instead, it just sounded tired. Like the energy was just drained out of him. As he went to open the door, another hand quickly pushed it shut.
"No way. You're not leaving until you tell me what the hell's going on with you?" Rage wasn't something Kirishima was accustomed to. Sure, getting fired up and passionate, that he did. But actual anger? Not him. Except for when something was wrong with his friends. He especially hated it when people acted like they were OK when their whole world was going to hell.
"It's none of your damn business." This came out as a deep growl from the Blonde teenager, firmly stepping up to Kirishima to get him to back off.
"Really? Cos when you come into my room at three in the freaking morning, it becomes my problem." Kirishima returned the aggressive stance from Bakugo with his own.
"What?" A slight return of Bakugo's usual mocking tone crept into his voice once more. "Are we gonna sit around and have a tea party, talking about our feelings and cure everything wit love and teddy bears." A taunting grin came upon Bakugo's face, insulting Kirishima's emotional personality.
Letting out a quiet noise of exhaustion, Kirishima took his hand off the door.
"I don't get you! Obviously, something's wrong, but you're just too pig-headed to say anything. Is it about what happened before at the camp? With the villains? It's OK to talk about that stuff. Just level with me for once, man-to-man."
"STOP FUCKING CALLING ME THAT." In contrast to the quiet tone of before, Bakugo's voice was raised to a high point with this demand. As soon as he said it, he instantly began worrying he woke up the rest of the dorm and everyone would find out.
"Stop calling you what?" The confusion of Kirishima's voice was obvious. He knew that Bakugo had a short fuse, and what he said would've probably set him off. But Kirishima was honesty wondering what he called Bakguo to make him so angry. He hadn't called him anything. Except for…..
"A man." The whimper from this quiet whisper of Bakugo's spoke volumes about how he felt. Tears began to appear at the edge of his face as he let go of the door and walked over to Kirishima's bed, falling across it with his back. The bag he had been so intent on keeping a secret was now laid across Kirishima's feet.
A string of whispered curses could be heard from Bakugo, as he kept thudding his head on the soft surface of the bed.
Still in a dazed state, Kirishima began to go over everything he just heard. Realizing that talking to Bakugo would be better than just pondering over this, he grabbed the bag (Making sure not to look into it) and made his way over to his friend.
The cursing had now devolved into quite sobs, Bakugo's hands covering his face in shame.
"Why don't you want me to call you a man?" Kirishima mustered this as gently as he could, not wanting to aggravate Bakugo any further in his vulnerable state. He just wanted to make his crus-friend stop hurting.
The sobs continued, now punctuated with F-words and other assorted cursing as Bakugo tried to make himself stop. Eventually, he managed to sombre himself to the point of being able to talk again, sitting up as he got ready to do so.
"Look in the bag." A simple statement from Bakugo to probably the person he was closest to in the entire school.
"Why?" Kirishima had damn near forgotten about the bag at this point, only being concerned about his friend wellbeing.
"Jesus, are you always this stupid or are you taking fucking classes? Just look in the bag!" With a quick hand to the ground, Bakugo pulled up the paper container and pushed it into his companion.
Slightly worried and slightly curious, Kirishima slowly grabbed both ends of the bag and pulled it open. He made sure to keep one eye on Bakugo as he did so for any changes in him. All he noticeD was the occasional cursed whisper to himself as Bakugo balled his hands into fists.
Finally opening the bag, Kirishima's mouth fell slightly agape as he gazed at its contents. Coinciding with this surprise was quick groan from Bakugo. Needing a better look, Kirishima pulled out the item inside and let it out in front of him.
A dress. A black dress with ruffles on the end. This was what Bakugo was trying to hide with his life from anyone seeing.
"Is this for your Mom? It looks nic-" This was genuinely the first thought through Kirishima's head as he saw this.
"It's for me, dumbass." His head bowed, staring intently at his feet, Bakugo seemed to be brutally resigned to whatever happened to him.
"Oh." Kirishima couldn't think of anything else to say, honestly at a loss for words at the situation. Looking at the dress and back to Bakugo, the dots in Kirishima's mind began to line up, letting him ultimately realize what was happening and what was going on with Bakugo.
"Oh."
Another pained sob escaped from Bakugo's mouth as tears began to drop from his face.
"Go on, have a good fucking laugh. I know everyone else will when they find out. Bakugo's a tranny!" This self-hateful taunt soon turned into full crying as her head fell down further.
Never having dealt with Bakugo like this, Kirishima's heart rate increased, trying to find some way to cheer up his friend.
"Hey, ma- Bakugo. None of us would ever laugh at you." Deciding to try something different, Kirishima brought an arm around Bakugo's shoulders, pulling him in close for comfort. To his surprise, Bakugo didn't resist one bit, simply continuing her breakdown.
"Don't fucking bullshit me. I know I'm just some mismatched freak." Bakugo looked up at Kirishima with tear stained eyes, bloodshot and despairing. Eyes challenging Kirishima to prove her wrong.
Shook having seen such self-loathing from the normally prideful Bakugo, Kirishima pulled him closer into a hug, trying to ease his friend's pain.
"Bakugo, you're our friend. No matter what, we'll be there for you." Hearing more crying from Bakugo, Kirishima decided to go for broke with her crush. "Besides, you'd make an amazing girl."
This caused a momentary stop to Bakugo's tears. Pushing away, Bakugo back herself up to the board of Kirishima's bed, her breathing and tear having momentarily relaxed for the moment.
They sat their together for a while. Kirishima checked his phone and realized it was now 5:30. He usually got up around 7. Today's class was not going to be fun. But that was the least of his worries.
"I saw it. Last time I was in that stupid shopping centre." Bakugo began, almost talking as much to herself as anyone. "It was sitting there, all pretty and shit. I saw some girls buying ones like it. And it just fucking hurt. Why couldn't I buy one? Why wasn't I allowed? Why did I have to be a fucking boy and they got to be girls?" Bringing a fist up to smash against the board, she instead softly let it land on the bed.
"So, I bought it. Dumbass running the counter thought it was for my Mom, just like you did. I thought if I bought it and tried it on, I'd realized that all these feelings were just fucking bullshit. That I was normal, like anyone else."
"Instead, it felt so right. More right than anything ever has. I felt everything finally made some fucking sense. And it was fuckin' terrifying. I didn't….deal with it well." Bakugo held up his bandaged hand as an indicator of this.
They sat in silence once again, Kirishima knowing how Bakugo felt now. What was going on in her world.
"Shit, this is fucked. Deku's going to get a great fucking kick out of this. The person who's been making his live miserable wants to be a girl. Like they'll let me become a hero after this." No tears came this time. Just a broken statement.
"Bakugo, listen to me." Kirishima decided to speak up, feeling it was his time.
"If you're a girl, than that's cool. Heck, it's more than cool, it's amazing. It just shows how strong you are to come out with it." Bakugo gave a glare towards Kirishima for his accidental pun, but the Red-Haired student continued. "And Midoria wants to be your friend. He won't give you crap over this." Looking towards Bakugo, Kirishima gave a comforting smile. "And if they won't let become a hero over this, then we'll do it anyway. Screw what they think. If they have a problem, they ain't heroes." Kirishima turned his hand to its rock form to symbolize the statement, holding it out for a fistbump.
Looking at the fist and back to Kirishima, Bakugo gave a little laugh before returning the gesture. Sighing, Bakugo got up to his feet, grabbing the bag with his hand and once again made her way to the door. This time, Kirishima had no intention of stopping her.
"Yo, Kirishima. Tell anyone about this and they'll find your fucking body in pieces." With her back turned to Kirishima, Bakugo held out one of her hands and a small explosion erupted from it.
"My lips are sealed." In some weird way, Kirishima was glad that Bakugo was back to her usual bad mood way. It showed she was feeling better.
Opening the door, Bakugo once again made sure to check if the coast was clear. Happy with what she saw, she turned back to her friend.
"And Kirishima? Thank you." With that, she closed the door and left.
Again looking at his clock, Kirishima pretty much decided he wasn't going to get any sleep tonight. It didn't matter. He was there for the girl he loved when she needed it. That's all that was important to him.
So, what did you think?
Thanks for reading :)
