Andromeda watched Hermione from across the court yard. She was alone, sitting quietly under the night sky, knees tucked under chin and arms folded across the top. She was staring up at the sky as if searching for something, maybe someone. She'd spent so much of her time alone since the war ended. Several weeks after all of the memorials and funerals and finished and the magical world settled into recovery mode, Hermione had gone in search of her parents. She'd come back a month later alone.
She wouldn't tell anyone what happened or what had become of her parents. It was as if they'd never existed in the first place. And she refused the Weasley's offer to remain at the Burrow with them, instead choosing to dwell at Hogwarts for the summer months.
Andromeda herself was a part of the team repairing the castle and had also decided to stay within its walls. Her cottage felt so lonely without Ted and now with Nymphadora and Remus gone as well, Andromeda couldn't stand being so alone. She was tasked with watching her grandson now and regardless of how much she loved the little boy that reminded her so much of her daughter, she couldn't bear the thought of being alone with him.
Her sister, Narcissa, had attempted to reconnect with Andromeda but it had been a rocky start. The blonde had done her best to be cordial but she struggled in the company of the Order. Though she had been an immense help with Teddy, while Narcissa struggled with her pureblood prejudices, she had always loved children. Had she married for love, Andromeda had no doubt that she'd have had at least six but undoubtedly more. She simply loved children and loved being a care giver. Even as children, Narcissa had been the mother hen, watching over Andy and Bella as they made trouble.
It made Andromeda wonder if Hermione was thinking about her parents. She wished the younger woman would open up to someone. She hardly new the girl outside of the Order but she'd even allow herself to be that person if it would only get Hermione to talk.
"Are you going to jump me or are you just observing?" Hermione said causing Andromeda to go wide eyed at having been caught lingering. She moved slowly into the dim light of the moon and hesitated before moving to sit with Hermione.
"Just came to tell you that dinner will be ready soon," Andromeda said hoping the lie sounded better out loud than it did in her head. "Minerva has requested your presence."
"Did she say what she wanted?"
Hermione searched Andromeda's eyes looking for the answer. Andy could tell she'd been caught but she pushed on regardless hoping to save face with the younger woman.
"Only your company," Andromeda said with a smile. Hermione smiled back but her eyes remained dull. She'd always shared a wonderful connection and comradery with her former professor. They both valued literature and quietude with a secret love of toeing at the rules. Kindred souls is what they were. If Hermione had possessed a scottish lilt and were about 10 years older, Andromeda would have staked her life that the girl were Minerva's daughter.
Hermione turned her eyes back to the sky and sighed. Her eyes traveled from sparkling constellation to sparkling constellation searching. "What do you think becomes of us when we die?" she spoke quietly. There was no emotion in her voice only quiet wonder as if she'd said the question to herself but then she rolled her head to the side and met Andromeda's eyes, searching again.
Andy's shoulders slumped and she let out a breath through slackened lips before too glancing up to the stars. She'd never been a religious person. Her family celebrated Christmas but Christianity was more a mythology to the wizarding world than an actual religion. She too had wondered greatly about death, particularly after Ted had died and now again with her daughter gone. "I'd like to believe that our lives continue."
Hermione dropped her eyes to the ground, eyebrows scrunching a bit. "Muggles have a concept called reincarnation used more in Eastern religions that involves being reborn after dead as something or someone else."
"Something like that," Andromeda agreed. "I don't know that I've much thought about muggle death because the only muggles I knew vanished after the first war and Ted was an only child so all we had was each other."
Andromeda glanced at Hermione. Her eyes were now hidden against her arm and there was a quiet shaking in her shoulders. She was crying.
"I believe that even if we are not reborn, our spirit joins the universe. We become a part of the energy that fuels stars and plants and storms." Andromeda continued to talk this way as Hermione sobbed. She didn't want to embarrass the girl and they had never been physically close other than the occasional hug so Andy offered the one thing she could, her voice. She spoke of how she believed that for magical folk, even after they were gone, their magic still remained on Earth and that she reckoned even the non-magical had some magic in them. How else can muggles feel and connect with the world just as deeply as wizards even if they can't harness that energy as wizards can? She spoke of how after the first war, the stars seemed to shine brighter than ever before as if they'd gained strength and she spoke of how she noticed much the same now.
"It's tradition in my family to name children after stars," Andy said and allowed her eyes to stray across the sky. Her eyes lingered on the galaxy she was named after and the twinkling lights that held the same affinity for her sisters. "Sometimes I wish I'd kept the tradition up."
This caused Hermione to stir a bit. Though her head still rested on her arms, she now faced Andy, eyes gleaming with curiosity and tears.
"I wonder if it would help," Andy continued seeing she now had her attention. "When I named Nymphadora I was dead set against giving her any affiliation with the Black family but now I wonder... at least a star is tangible. A grave is dead but stars are alive."
Andy felt a hand grip her own and entwine their fingers together. She smiled softly down at the younger woman. "The pain never gets better but it gets easier to live with."
"I don't know that I want it get easier," Hermione said, tears beginning to glisten at the corners of her eyes again. "It's my fault their gone, it seems only fair is suffer for them."
Andromeda's heart broke for the girl sitting in front of her. She looked so small and lost as if the wait of the world had broken her back and taken her down to rock bottom. She couldn't help herself from pulling the bushy haired woman against her chest. It seemed the contact was all it took for Hermione's floodgate to finally release.
They say like that for near an hour. Hermione shook and cried in Andromeda's arms until she finally sniffled herself into a dozing sleep. Her face was softer in sleep. She'd always had a beautiful face but when she slept, the worry that often marred her features fell away and left an achingly beautiful woman in its place. Andy squeezed her gently at the thought and Hermione pushed herself deeper into Andromeda's chest causing the woman to blush lightly and brush some hair away from Hermione's face. She knew they needed to head inside for dinner but she knew this was the first bit of sleep Hermione and gotten in a month and she'd be damned if she was going to ruin it.
She stayed put and gazed out at the stars. She wasn't unaware of how similar she and Hermione were. They both held a tendency for immense emotions which they kept locked away until a sledgehammer bust through whatever unsteady wall they had managed to build. They both had lost their parents at a young age because of decisions they'd made, though Andy could always take comfort that her parents were alive and mostly well.
Another hour passed and Andromeda was beginning to ache from their position but she'd still managed to cast a wandless warming spell on them. She heard the shuffle of footsteps moving along the outdoor corridor surrounding the courtyard and shifted her head to see Minerva.
The woman's stern expression was significantly softer these days and her bright green eyes didn't show quiet as brightly but she still held an aura of authority as she walked through the halls. Andromeda smiles gently at her former professor and ran a hand through the sleeping brunettes hair.
"She cried herself to sleep, " Andromeda explained. "She didn't say much but I've got an idea now of what's been worrying her so."
Minerva gave an almost imperceptible nod and opened her mouth to ask what it was before deciding better of it. If Hermione was opening up to someone then it was better Andy didn't betray that trust.
"Will you be okay out here?" Minerva asked. "You missed dinner."
"I'll have a house elf bring up something later. I think right now she needs her rest."
"Would you like help moving her to her chambers?"
Andromeda thought about it and then shook her head and smiled down at the brunette in her arms. "We'll stay here for now," she said then looked up at the sky. "It's a beautiful night and nothing quite warms the soul like sleeping under the stars."
