Remus got home earlier than expected. He had an appointment with Dumbledore but Dumbledore had an emergency and he had to go. That's why, when he opens the door of his apartment that he shares with his boyfriend - Sirius -, he didn't announce himself, he wanted to do a surprise to Sirius.
But, when he started walking toward their bedroom, Remus heard some music that was way too loud for him. He opened the door to ask Sirius to turn it down a little, but what he saw made him freeze in the doorway.
Gun in my purse, bitch I came dressed to kill
Who wanna go first? I'll have 'em pushin' daffodils
I'm high as hell, I only took a half a pill
I'm on some dumb shit
By the way, what he say?
He can tell I ain't missing no meals
Come through and fuck him in my automobile
Let him eat it with his grills, he keep telling me to chill
He keep telling me it's real, that he love my sex appeal
Say he don't like 'em boney, he wants something he can grab
So I pulled up in the Jag, and I hit him with a jab like
Dun duh dun dun dun dun dun
My anaconda don't
My anaconda don't
My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hun
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Oh my gosh, look at her butt
Look at her butt (look at her butt)
Sirius was in his boxers and had his back turned from the door and he was.. Remus wasn't sure what he was doing. Was he.. Dancing ?
He was sure as hell moving his butt in a weird way.
Remus stood there, watching, for a couple of minutes and decided to move slowly, closing the door and got out of the apartment slowly and silently. When the door of his apartment was closed, he stood there for a little while, still shocked, and when he left, he decided that her will never, ever get home earlier than what he said to Sirius and that he will never, ever talk about what he just saw.
Ever.
