10/31/16

Dank Memes v66

A Creepypasta by Xenucedes

It was around 1:30 in the dirty New Jersey Apartment where I had been staying at for the week. There was a pelting rain outside that rattled the windows as if it wanted to enter my room. Of course, the room was so empty and damp that I probably wouldn't have noticed if it did. It had been a long week of dreary disappointment. I worked full-time at a movie theatre that only showed arthouse films and independent flicks. Occasionally I was given the opportunity to choose a selection of cult classics that people would actually consider watching. But unfortunately, this month's choice was given to another early bird co-worker who thought it would be a brilliant idea to showcase Michael Bay's Armageddon. The janitor, Mr. Olsen, had left the workplace to tend to dying relatives and I was given the flattering opportunity to clean smelly bathrooms, scrub down snack counters, and try to get rid of the strange sticky substance that seems to reside on every floor in every theatre. So with only Smash Mouth and Micheal Jackson to accompany me in the late night work shifts, I've spent my weeks longing to be switching reels for the projector behind the "Employees Only" sign. Tonight had been a particularly rough day. After mopping a gloppy mess of questionable origin, I was uninformed that I was supposed to mention to another staff member to separate Seth Rogen's "Sausage Party" trailer from the kid-friendly film pile and as a result, about a few dozen children were exposed to the profane perverted violence. The manager had a talk to me about my responsibilities to the theatre and other bullcrap like that, and once that was over, I received less than prefered in my paycheck.

After walking back through the rain because I couldn't afford a bus, I finally entered my lovely hovel. It consisted of a small kitchen, a small couch-bed, and my small desktop that I called my TV. I know a few people that would be too claustrophobic to this type of living, but for me, I could easily call it home. After a bowl of cereal and a handful of Fritos, I sat down on my couch and opened my desktop. Unbeknownst to most of the residents in my apartment, I had the fastest access internet better than anyone else here. I often surfed Youtube like a tidal wave and today was no different. I was so done with reality I was ready to laugh at whatever ignorance these people could give me.

After opening YouTube, I realized that I had forgot to clear my history since last I used it, and my recommended page was flooded with Vine Compilation garbage. I liked viewing them time to time, but the website believes if you watch one video related to this funny black guy, or this high-pitched voice chick that apparently you should be bombarded with this content over and over again. As I scrolled down the page, an odd thumbnail caught my eye.

"DANK MEMES v66 TEST YOUR HUMANITY CHALLENGE!"

An invitation of this sort was nothing new to me. For those of you who have the privilege of not knowing what a Dank Memes challenge is, it's a collage of videos that are made to test your sense of humor and of your morality. It often showed clips of edited footage of politicians to make them say racial and sexist slurs, clips of America's darkest times made to look "funny", modified innocent cartoons to be disgusting and horrible, and "exposing" whatever idiot online who was being controversial at the time. Although I am not a fan of this genre of the dark side of Youtube, there's an odd urge to make me waste my life in front of this profanity.

There are millions of these type of videos to choose from, but there was something odd that made this video stand out. From the other heaps of trash that I'm usually exposed to. The image on the thumbnail didn't show a photo-shopped image of Donald Trump or a picture of Filthy Frank, instead it showed a image of a smiling boy that I had never seen before. This teenager must've been around 16 or 17. He had long straight stringy hair that was dyed fire engine red. His skin seemed discolored, as if he spent days in a dark basement playing Warcraft. But his eyes, his eyes were abnormally large. The clip certainly wasn't photoshopped because that would've been obvious. The boy must've been widening his eyes or have been on some sort of drug because his eyes were bloodshot, dilated, and very huge. I clicked on the link and started to watch.

The video began how I would expect; A clip of Arthur punching, a few pre-election jokes, and a jab at Jacob Sartorius were enough to get me to chuckle a little bit. As I munched more chips however, I began to realize that there was a different atmosphere that usual. My room seemed to be getting darker even with the lamp on, and I felt itchy in my sweatpants I had changed into. Then I saw it, the video had the same teenager's picture sitting comfortably next to the clips. I thought it was put there to show that he made it, but when I paused the video, I noticed that the picture...was a video.

The boy wasn't blinking, but I could see him breathing. He never broke his smile, he made a very faint whistle every time he took a breath. I tried to see who this person was, but all the subscriber box said was "Dante Diablo" The video clip then showed a joke concerning 9-11, and that was enough for me, I tried to exit the video.

The boy's eyes followed me. THEY FOLLOWED MY MOUSE! He then made his first movement with his limbs. He clicked a button or some sort, and my mouse stopped right before the the X icon at the top of the webpage. I jiggled my mouse but it didn't move. Was this a hacker? How could he hack through a video? I shook the mouse a bit more until I slammed it down on the table. The boy then chuckled. He didn't stop staring or smiling, but he giggled through his clenched teeth. Then the video stopped. The clip showing a rubber chicken being stepped on was replaced with a video of a dark room. It had blood-red curtains and a giant cross in the center of the room with clamps on it.

"The hell?" I said out loud as my eyes adjusted to the image. I couldn't move my mouse but I noticed several more things that were wrong with my computer:

The page refreshed and I was now apparently on a dark website.

The URL was indecipherable. The only words I could make out were Eternal_

The video link had changed. "DANK MEMES v666 TEST YOUR HUMANITY!"

The video format also changed. Instead of a time limit of eleven minutes, It instead read Live feed.

The red haired boy was now laughing hysterically. He let his mouth open to laugh louder, I could even see inside his throat to see that he was gargling a maroon liquid.

"That's not blood, That's not blood, That's not blood." I said under my breath.

The room in the video buffered, then the boy walked in. He was dragging an unconscious girl. The girl must've been sixteen at best, but she looked extremely unhealthy. She seemed withered and tired, like she aged twenty years in her body. Her hair must've been brown at one point, but it was now tangled and...were those clumps of dust? The grinning bastard then clamped the girl onto the crucifix cackling with pleasure. He then turned to the camera as if he was on the Tonight Show.

"Greetings YouTubers!" the boy said through drools of blood, "Dante Diablo is here to entertain you for all of your personal needs!"

His voice was surprisingly deep and was heard through the liquid, but it was ear-bleedingly annoying.

"Tonight on the show, we have a very special guest! Please welcome fellow friend, TicklestheUnicorn1985!"

Dante then slapped the girl on the crucifix, she made no resistance, but she looked up slightly then bobbed her head back down. I had seen enough. I furiously tried to move my mouse away from its petrification.

"Don't try to leave yet folks! The fun hasn't started yet!" Dante growled as he looked back the camera. At me.

I pushed the power button repeatedly but the computer would not shut off.

Dante sighed, "Poor unfortunate soul, are you so anxious to leave?"

I jammed the power button until it cracked.

"Why do you want to leave? You have nothing better to do, why don't you finish? I'll leave once you finish." Dante said in a whiny sympathetic voice.

I got back up on my chair furious.

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Dante's smile then stopped. It contorted in the opposite direction as if it pained him to frown. But frown he did, and a very ugly one at that. He walked over to the camera, grabbed it ferociously, and stared deeply into it.

"STAY. You clicked on my link. Now you must stay."

Dante set the camera down and walked back toward Tickles the Unicorn on the crucifix.

"Tonight we're going to watch some more flicks about everything that is...beautiful about humanity. Sit back and relax gents!"

Dante pulled up a laptop, and showed me and the girl the rest of Dank Memes v666. There was nothing funny here. Everything terrible was on the screen. Shootings, Terrorism, Racism, Sexism, and millions of people screaming "I hate you. I hate you! I HATE YOU!"

The girl didn't scream, but she silently cried as the video continued. So much death. So much hatred. I finally succeeded to pull the plug behind the desk and the computer finally turned off. As I relaxed in the chair, I finally relaxed in a pool of my own sweat. The computer was steaming, the power button was broken, and the screen was cracked and the edges. It was beyond repair. I opened the window and pushed it out. It gracefully fell into the dumpster below. I watched as it shattered to bits in a discord of broken metal. It was almost beautiful.

I walked into the restroom to take a leak. I washed my hands. And I turned to turn off the light, but the switch did so on its own. The door slammed in unison, and I fell to the ground and hit my head on the toilet rim. The last thing I can remember before blacking out was a window shattering, followed by a familiar fire-engine red haired freak opening my bathroom door.

"You should have finished the video."

I never closed my account.