"Spence, I'm starting to think you just want me building things so you can stare at me," Toby teased as he took the designs that Spencer had handed him. Nearly all the things in their home had been made by him or fixed by him at some point. Toby took his time opening the papers. Of course he was happy to build her whatever she wanted, but usually she didn't ask in the middle of one of his projects. Toby was busy at work and really the last thing he wanted to do when he got home was more construction. "As long as this isn't another project for Hanna. I don't think I can handle all the pink again."
"It isn't for Hanna," Spencer pressed. It was hard for her to keep the smile off her face. "Although you never know, they could want pink. You have a while to complete it anyways."
It took a moment, but Toby figured out what she wanted him to build. "Who's pregnant?" He asked confused, as he looked harder against the designs. They didn't look like anything their friends would want. Plus, he was sure that Hanna already had a crib. "Why don't they just use one of their old cribs?"
Spencer laughed slightly as she pressed one hand against her chest. Her plan hadn't worked as well as she had planned it too. Maybe she just needed to spell it out for him.
"Well, I didn't think you would want our baby's crib to be store bought."
"I'm just saying that—" It took a moment before Toby's eyes widened as he looked up from the designs. "No." He said shocked. They had just decided to stop birth control. It wasn't even that they were trying to have a baby yet.
"I mean, I can ask Hanna if I can borrow—" Spencer stopped talking as she saw the grin grown on Toby's face. Having children was something that they had agreed upon from the start. They had waited until they were both in stable jobs and a good place in their lives to try. It was years after the other girls had their first babies. Hanna's little girl was already 3 when Spencer decided she was finally ready to get pregnant. Spencer had been more excited to see Toby's reaction than to find out that she was pregnant.
"You're pregnant?" He asked. The grin was stretched wide and Spencer couldn't help but smile in return. She wasn't even able to speak, but instead she just grinned and nodded. She didn't know if it was the hormones, but she felt the happy tears begin to cloud her vision. She nodded again before she laughed softly.
There wasn't even a beat of silence before he moved quickly to where she stood and wrapped his arms around her. Spencer couldn't stop the giggle from escaping her mouth as he lifted her up and spun her around. She felt like a schoolgirl again instead of an adult. Spencer pulled back from the embrace and pushed her lips against his quickly. It was all so exciting and she had to kiss him.
When she looked at him again, Spencer could see the tears in Toby's eyes. It only caused her heart to flutter more. There was pure joy in his face and Spencer reached her hands up to cup his face. "You're going to be a daddy."
There wasn't anything that Toby would rather be in the world.
The pregnancy was different than he imagined. It had been so funny to see bits and pieces of all their friend's pregnancy, but when he was fully involved in one, it was different. There weren't as many funny stories about midnight cravings. If anything, the first two trimesters were worst than he ever imagined. Spencer was crankier and his once emotionally stable wife was up and down like he had never seen before. Luckily, it was easier for Toby to keep his cool with Spencer. He just had to think for a moment about how Spencer was carrying their baby and all feelings of annoyance or anger would disappear.
The morning sickness was the worst.
Morning sickness didn't matter to Toby at all. There was no disgust when he cleaned up the mess. He was always there when she was over the toilet or sink or wherever the morning sickness hit. It was more upsetting to Spencer than to him. The doctors had reassured them both that while her morning sickness was hard and a bit on the extreme side, there was no reason to be concerned. Spencer had to take a week off of work during the worst of it. She could barely move without getting sick.
It hit Spencer the hardest when she discovered what her body did and didn't like while she was pregnant. It was hard for her to give up the control to the infant inside of her, but there was no other choice. It was clear that the fetus knew what it didn't want. Long gone were the days where she could have Thai food or Vietnamese food. Instead, she found herself craving more raw food.
It was the coffee rejection that almost crippled her.
Spencer had been so used to drinking her cups of coffee during the day. Her job required her to stay up late and wake up early. She needed the caffeine boost in the morning. It was a month into her first pregnancy that her body completely rejected coffee.
Spencer had remembered that she was able to sleep in that morning till 7. By the time she had gotten down the stairs, she was hit by the smell of coffee. She had started to smile at the thoughtfulness of Toby before the coffee smell reached through her and it only took a moment before she was rushing to the bathroom to puke her guts out. Toby had met her with concern and all she had been able to say was to get the coffee out of the house. It didn't matter if he had to throw the pot out the window; Spencer needed the smell out of her kitchen.
She could only leave the bathroom once the smell had left the kitchen. It might have been the only thing she cried over losing during her pregnancy.
"Do not laugh at me, Toby Cavanaugh!"
Spencer was flushed with embarrassment as she pressed her hands against her forehead in disbelief. It was the fourth time in the day that she had forgotten where she put her keys. She could see Toby laughing in her vision and it only made her madder.
"Maybe we need to get you a snap on key chain."
"If you don't get over here and help me look for my keys, you will be sleeping on the couch tonight."
Toby only shook his head as he reached and grabbed her keys off the counter. "Is this what you're looking for?" The grin on his face only made Spencer want to grab him and make sure that self-satisfied grin wasn't on his face anymore.
"Do not laugh at me," she repeated, but this time her voice cracked. The anger started to turn to despair. Why couldn't she think anymore? "Don't laugh at me."
It only took a few seconds before Toby's hands were on her hips. "I'm not laughing at you, Spence."
"You are. I can't even remember where I put anything anymore. This little… invader is effectively starting to ruin my life." The smile was still on Toby's face and Spencer crinkled her eyebrows together in confusion. "Why are you still smiling? This isn't anything to smile about."
Toby didn't even say anything. He leaned forward slowly and captured her lips in a slow kiss. His thumbs rubbed against her hipbones. Spencer could feel the tension start to leave her as his tongue pressed against her bottom lip. Suddenly, anything that was upsetting her was meaningless.
"I'm sorry," she whispered out softly as she wiped a stray tear off her cheek.
"You don't ever have to apologize," Toby said softly as he moved a hand to press against her stomach. There was a small bump forming and to feel it just reminded him how real this all was. "What you forget, I'll remember. All that you need to remember is that is our little intruder right here and I love you. Even if you forget your own name."
The seemingly non-growing baby bump was the only thing that concerned Toby.
Spencer was almost 6 months along and she was still tiny.
Even though the doctors had reassured him that it was perfectly natural, it was hard for Toby to digest how absolutely tiny his wife was without worrying. The doctors had said that Spencer was growing at the optimum rate for her body type. Shouldn't the baby being growing more? Why didn't Spencer look like all the other pregnant women he had seen? Toby had been relieved slightly once Spencer started to show. It had taken her till she was 6 months along to even need to switch into looser fitting clothing. She hadn't even needed to switch to the maternity section yet.
No matter how many times the doctors said it was normal and no matter how many articles he read about it, Toby wouldn't stop worrying about it. He knew that it was natural and that for someone's first baby, the bump would be smaller, but he didn't expect it to be as small as it was.
"Are you sure we should go to the doctor again?" Toby asked for the hundredth time as they sat on the couch watching TV. It had been about a month since their last appointment. What if something had happened since then? Maybe the baby wasn't growing anymore.
"Toby," Spencer sighed out as she just leaned more into Toby's side. His arm was wrapped around her shoulders. She reached up to grab his hand hanging off her shoulder. It was a conversation that they had far too often. Spencer wasn't concerned at all at her size. In fact, she was ecstatic that she wasn't hugely pregnant at this point. It meant that everything was easier to manage. Her back didn't kill her and people weren't bending over backwards to help her when she didn't need it.
"Fine," he said softly as he squeezed her hand. She hadn't even needed to say anything to stop him from worrying. They had this conversation too often. He knew that she was right. Everything was alright and their baby was fine. His eyes weren't watching the TV at this point; they were watching Spencer and just looking at her small bump. In one of his shirts, it was easier to see bump. It was small but it was there.
His gaze turned to concern when he saw a look of discomfort suddenly appear on Spencer's face. "What's wrong?" he asked, sitting up more on the couch. "Is it the baby? Are you okay?"
Spencer could just nod as she smiled as she set a hand upon her own stomach. "The baby's just is kicking." A look of relief passed over Toby's face hearing that it wasn't anything serious. It was the strangest sensation to feel the baby move within her. It felt like nothing before. It always caused her heart to flutter as she felt it. As much as she could ignore her bump, when the baby moved, it reminded her that there was life inside of there. Spencer knew that one quick way to get Toby to stop worrying was to distract him.
She reached down and pulled the t-shirt until it was resting in a bunch at the top of her stomach. "Here," she said as she grabbed his hands and set them down on her bare stomach. His large hands expanded and took up most of her bump. "Convince your daddy that you are just fine."
Toby's hands moved slowly over Spencer's baby bump. His fingers stretched as he tried to find the exact location of where the kicks were going to come from. A smile lit up his face as he felt a kick beneath his palm. Even though he had felt it kick before, it was still a new experience each time. It reminded him that no matter how much he worried, the baby was still there and moving.
"See, we're fine. The baby is happy and healthy," Spencer smiled as she took in the sight. She couldn't wait to see Toby holding their son or daughter in his arms and not just trying to get the interaction through her stomach. Toby just nodded. He was too caught up in the moment; he could feel the baby shifting inside of Spencer.
They were going to be fine. Everything was fine.
By the time that Spencer was 9 months along, the concern over Spencer being too small was completely gone.
Instead, she felt huge by the time her due date was coming up. It seemed like overnight she had gone from being small to being completely huge. Her stomach protruded out and she hadn't even been able to sit comfortably at her desk anymore. While Spencer had wanted to work until she gave birth, she had ended up needing to work from home most of the time.
"You shouldn't be doing dishes," Toby spoke as he entered the kitchen. He knew exactly how Spencer's back had started to pain her as she grew. It only seemed fair that he would take on the more strenuous household activities. She needed to rest instead of pushing herself.
"I'm pregnant, not crippled," Spencer replied as she turned off the water. She rolled her neck as she felt the ache rise in her back. She knew she should sit down, but she didn't want to be one of those pregnant women who just slid off all the chores to their husbands. She wouldn't be that woman. She was stronger than that.
"Spencer," Toby mumbled as he walked up to where his wife was standing. "You need to relax." His hands reached to rest against Spencer's hips as he pulled her body back to form against his own. His hands slid underneath Spencer's shirt to rest against her bare skin. Toby was glad that her hair was pulled up in a bun. It made it that much easier to press his lips to her neck.
There had never been any doubt that Toby didn't find her attractive when she had the full stomach. If anything, his attraction to her had only grown as she had started to expand. When they were together, his hands always seemed to be on her in someway. Even if he wasn't directly touching her stomach, it was like he couldn't keep his hands off of her. It definitely something Spencer wasn't complaining about. If anything, it was something that she was bragging about. Spencer had heard about how terrified Ezra had been to get intimate when Aria was expecting. That wasn't anything Toby and her had a problem. Spencer didn't think she would have made it through the pregnancy if Toby had become afraid to touch her sexually. Not that she couldn't go the months without intercourse, but her hormones had been off the walls later on during her pregnancy and sex seemed to be one of the only things that she could fully enjoy.
When she got larger, they had to start trying new things. Her stomach started to get in the way and they had to become creative because it was nearly impossible for Toby to stay on top of her without pressing against her stomach.
"You need to relax," Toby muttered again as he started to slid her shirt off of her. "I can help with that."
She lifted her arms to help him get the shirt off. As soon as the shirt was off, Toby quickly pulled his own shirt off. Toby could feel Spencer start to turn around, but he blocked her motion. He set her hands against the counter. She didn't need to do any of the work. His hands slid up her arms before he started to massage her back. He could feel the tension and worked slowly to get her to loosen up. His kisses trailed across her shoulder. Toby's fingers moved to Spencer's lower back. Spencer began to moan as Toby's fingers reached the right spots in her lower back.
"Couch," Toby whispered as soon as he felt most of the tension release from her back. He steadily guided her to the couch. In any other moment, Spencer would have complained about how Toby was treating her like she needed to be led. But in the moment, it didn't matter.
Even without kissing yet, the moment had become quiet and intimate.
His lips kissed light, feathery kisses to her enlarged stomach as his fingers trailed to the waistband of her pants. One thing he loved about the maternity clothes was how easy it was to get them off. All it took was a slight lift of Spencer's hips and he was able to pull both her pants and panties off in one motion. He pushed them down her toned legs. It was incredibly telling of their relationship on how easy it all seemed. The fumbling was minimum; they moved so in sinc with each other. There wasn't a need for words in the moment. Everything that needed to be said was done so with looks and soft touches. Spencer's legs spread instinctively as he moved closer to her after pushing her pants to the side.
Spencer shivered as Toby kissed the inside of her knee. The start of stubble on his cheeks tickled her as he kissed up her thigh. She had never felt so adored than during the pregnancy. Even though Toby had always made sure her needs were met, it was a totally different level of devotion now. He worked solely to make her happy.
Spencer felt absolutely worshiped.
The labor went for longer than they ever expected. Spencer had been in labor for over 24 hours before she was fully dilated. By the time it was time to push, she was completely exhausted. She had opted out of the epidural, but strongly regretted the decision once it was time for her to actually push.
Spencer liked to think of herself as a strong woman. It hadn't been that difficult for her to get through the first 12 hours of her labor, but after that mark, it became harder and harder to keep her cool. She had walked down the hallways of the maternity wing countless times. The large ball had been discarded in the corner because it definitely didn't feel better to be bouncing. When the contractions only got worse and Spencer hadn't known how much longer she could go on for. She was exhausted. It was non-stop. This wasn't like when she had done all-nighters in law school. She didn't have a pot of coffee every hour and she hadn't been in this much pain.
It only took Toby's encouragement to make Spencer keep going. He would remind her that the pain came with a gift. She wasn't going through pain just because; it was because their beautiful baby was coming into the world. She wasn't doing it for herself after the 24-hour mark. It was the first time that she realized she wasn't making this decision for herself. Spencer was doing this all for their baby. It had given her enough strength to keep going.
"Okay, Mrs. Cavanaugh, it's almost time to push."
Spencer had never worked as hard as she was in that moment. She was exhausted, but she hadn't even reached the finish line yet. She could feel the pressure and knew that she had to push, but she couldn't. Toby hand squeezed hers tightly and he pressed a kiss to her sweaty forehead. Spencer felt like sobbing, but she could only shake her head in frustration. "I can't. I'm not ready," Spencer whimpered. The nurses and doctor in the room stayed quiet. They had probably been through the same encounter thousands of times, but it didn't matter to Spencer. This was her first baby and she was scared.
"You can do it," Toby said with a smile as he pushed back stray hairs that were sticking to her forehead. "I love you. Let's have our baby." Spencer nodded at the words. Her eyes shut in concentration. All she had to do was go through this and then they'd have their baby.
It was the hardest thing she had ever done in her life. She had never thought the stories of women breaking their partner's hands were true, but she must have squeezed Toby's hand harder than she had ever squeezed anything before.
There was nothing more beautiful than hearing your baby cry. It was the best moment of Spencer's life. There was so much pain, but the cry made it all worth it. She would have gone through 10 more times of pain for that beautiful noise. Spencer hadn't been able to contain her sobs as soon as she heard the cry.
"It's a girl," the doctor said before he set the baby on Spencer's chest.
God, she was beautiful. There was no doubt in Spencer's mind that their baby was the most gorgeous thing she had ever seen. Spencer glanced up to look at Toby. There was so much happiness on his face. Spencer had never seen him so happy before and it only made her cry harder. Her gaze met his for a moment and she said everything through just the simple glance. We did this; we made this. "Hi, baby," Spencer whispered out as she trailed her fingers lightly across her baby's side. "I'm your mommy." Her voice cracked with emotion.
Toby was the first one to really hold her after she was all cleaned up. Spencer was finally able to get comfortable after the nurses helped clean her up and gave her a different hospital gown. She smiled as she saw Toby finally get to hold their baby girl. Spencer wasn't so concerned with holding her; she knew that Toby needed his turn with their baby. Spencer got to carry her for 9 months; the least she could do was give Toby a few minutes. Spencer wasn't the only one to have cried over their little bundle of joy. She knew that Toby was just as emotional as she was. This had always been something he wanted. And now he had a daughter.
"Lilah Marion Cavanaugh," Spencer said slowly. She ahd to make sure that the name sounded like she expected it to. They had their list of names, but Spencer had wanted to make sure they named the baby somehow after Toby's mother if she was a girl. It was important to her to make sure that their baby was not only apart of her, but a part of Toby as well. Spencer could see the surprise had been a good one. The grin grew even more on his face.
Their lives had changed forever. This was their baby and everything had changed.
"Hi, Lilah. I'm your daddy. Welcome to the world."
