Dancing in the rain
I lay on the cold, hard ground. Beside me was a pile of flower stalks.
He loves me...
That was the only solution I came to. But if he really did love me, why did he always look at me so coldly?
My tears dropped into the earth. Nobody would find me here, nobody knew this place. My secret garden...
A while ago it started raining. At the beginning only a few drops, now it was pouring heavily.
I was lying underneath a Sakura tree, it caught the rain and kept me dry. Almost as if it would protect me...
"Stupid,it's just a tree", I imagined my best friend Hotaru say. I smiled at the thought.
Abrupt footsteps scared me.
"Could it be? Could it be... him?"
My heart tightend of fear and hope.
He hates me, why would he search for me?
I curled myself up, while the footsteps came nearer.
"I thought you would be here", the husky voice I loved so much said.
"Why are you here?", I hissed, trying not to tear up.I hid my face from him.
" I had the feeling that you were crying alone and for some reason I came here."
Now real tears were streaming down my cheeks.
"How did you find this place?", I croaked.
He laughed. "You forgot? Our first kiss..."
Why did he all of a sudden act like...like...he loved me? I wanted a honest answer to my question.
"Natsume...", I tried to surpress all the love I held for him, but I couldn't help but speak his name lovingly.
"Why are you behaving yourself so... abnormal? I mean... you don't love me, so you needn't act like my boyfriend or whatsoever."
The whole time I stared at my hands, still crouching on the we earth. Then I sat up to see his reaction and flinched. His red eyes were burning in fury.
"Polka-dots... tell me... Why do you think so?", his quiet, restrained voice frightened me more,than if he would have shouted.
" 'Cause...'cause you always look at me so disdainful and... everyone says you despise me and you're always mean to me and...and...!", I sobbed.
"But sometimes you are so friendly,so loving and... you stole my heart Idiot! I...I love you. You idiot, Natsume. You selfish and moron."
The tree didn't hold the rain anymore and we got soppy. I started hitting him.
"Why? Why! Why, Why, Why!", I screamed.
He didn't react, so I started hitting myself.
"I'm so stupid, I'm not good enough... Stupid, stupid, stupid!" I hit myself and though the clapping sound of the multiple slaps I gave myself satisfied my, the pain wasn't enough.
He tried to stop me, but he couldn't. I felt the heat of the blood rushing through my cheeks and felt the several bruises I gave myself, when he finally managed to prevent me hurting myself more.
"Stop it, stop it, damn it, STOP IT MIKAN!"
That was a shock. He said my name...
He pulled me to my feet and forced my to look at him. His raven black hair was hanging in his face and his blood red eyes were mesmerizing me. The smile he gave me, that smile light up my world.
"Me too. Mikan, I love you. I can not have anyone else hold your hand at the end, but myself."
"Natsume...me too. I don't want to be separated. I don't want to let go of this hand."
He embraced me and I laughed, hugging him, while crying. The rain left us soaking and I wanted to go inside with him, when he did the weirdest thing like ever.
He opened his blazer, threw it in the muddy ground and reached out for my hand.
"May I have this dance?", he asked me extravagant looking deep into my eyes.
I smiled, offered him my hand and he escorted me out of the shelter of the tree.
I layed one hand on his shoulder and he entwined a hand around my waist. We started to dance. It was a slow waltz and the whole time I was captured in his eyes.
Nothing boheredd me anymore, as long as he held me with his strong hands.
Finally our lips found themselves. His lips were soft on mine.
He leaned his head against my forehead and whispered: "I love you now until forever,more than anyone else."
And I knew it was true, when we stayed .
