The Death of Barney

An Obituary by Steven Margolin

Today is the memorial of the beloved child icon, Barney. It is believed that his death has something to do with BJ and Baby-Bop, and not being paid enough. They are being held in custody until an undisclosed time. Barney will be remembered for his enthusiasm and annoying purple color. The man inside the costume is currently looking for new work.

Barney's career will be thought of fondly by all. His 22 year run on several different networks makes him an icon to anybody that is or was a child in the past 22 years. Barney's career highlights include singing, dancing and giving out hugs.

When asked what he wanted to be when he grew up, Barney replied, "Anything that involves kids, or ice cream." This is a touching moment for all who remember his struggles with ice cream addiction. It was a sad time for Barney, but with strength, perseverance, and a little song and dance he made it through a better dinosaur.

Barney will live on through his loving wife, Stegosaurus. Her children Egg 1 and Egg 2 will never forget their step-father. As a final note to anyone age 5 and younger, no he is not coming back.