All my life I have been into wrestling. I can remember growing up in Texas and coming in from summer play to watch Saturday Nights Main Event with my dad and brother. I grew up watching the Von Erich family take on the group of The Freebirds. I was a huge fan of "Macho Man" Randy Savage and "Hot Rod" Rowdy Roddy Piper. It wasn't until I was 19 that I decided I wanted to become a professional wrestler. I knew that I would do anything, risk anything, to make my dream come true.
When I graduated high school, I quickly enrolled in a massage therapy program. It was something I had always loved and I really took to it well. I began working at small gym as an on call massage therapist about 10 minutes away from my home. As well as the massage therapist, I was the gym's yoga instructor. I started working out regularly and took up kick boxing, Judo and Jujutsu in my spare time. While working at the gym, I met Kevin.
Kevin Saunders was 6'3 and completely beautiful. He had a great, muscular body and was tan, with bright green eyes, a chiseled chin, and short, spiked blonde hair. He was one of my first regular clients. He would schedule appointments three times a week and after each appointment he would ask me out. Every time, I would tell him that I couldn't date a client. I would watch him from my office while he was working out. I invited my best friend Tamma to my office for lunch one day, partially so she could see who I was talking about. We sat staring out my window watching him lift weights without his shirt on.
"That's the guy who's been asking you out?" she asked, her eyes locked on to Kevin.
"Uh huh." I replied.
We both sat in silence for a moment, watching his muscular arms as he pumped his weights.
"If you don't say yes to him, can I?" she asked, tearing her eyes away from the scene.
"No way, I saw him first." I informed her.
He stopped going to my gym just so I could say yes to him. He was sweet, funny, very charming and my friends and my parents adored him. We had a lot of things in common, including our love for wrestling. He didn't pressure me into sex right away. I was a virgin when we began our relationship and he said he wanted to make sure that I was ready. He didn't seem to mind that it took me eight months to be that ready. He stayed by my side when my mother passed away. He was a rock during that whole time. Tamma kept telling me to not let him get away.
"Someone who looks that good and treats you well? Does he have a brother?" Tamma asked.
I had an offer from one of my mom's brothers to live with him in St. Paul, MN. I was considering it. I needed a break from Charleston too. It was beginning to be too much still living in the house after Mom died. I wanted to start training to be a professional wrestler but I couldn't find a place in Charleston. South Carolina had an athletic commission that caused a lot of promotions to dry up because of the cost. I figured if Minnesota was good enough for Arn Anderson and Ric Flair, it was good enough for me. I was nervous when I told Kevin about my offer from Uncle Jerry but Kevin was great. He told me if that's what I wanted to do, he would go with me. So two days after my 19th birthday, Kevin and I moved to St. Paul, MN. I moved into a spare bedroom at Uncle Jerry's and Kevin moved in with a friend of his not fair from me.
We started training at a school that looked like it should have been a VFW hall. I felt like it was almost too nice to be a training school. I was one of the only females in the class. It didn't bother me. I didn't get along with those girls. They would only work out in the ring with each other. They thought I was weird because I wasn't afraid to train with the guys and I didn't like them because all they seemed to care about was how they looked or screwing the other wrestlers, not about their wrestling skills. I also felt it was weird that it was just a training school. Shows were not being run out of the building or by anyone associated with the school. The trainer was Mark Davis, who seemed to treat me differently because I was a girl. I chalked it up to the girls there at the school not being much of a helping hand and I figured if I showed him I could be like one of the boys, he would let me do more. But Mark wouldn't let me help set up the ring. He didn't treat me like any of the other trainees because I was a woman. I liked Mark but I told him he was sexist. He shrugged, told me that's how the wrestling business is. I knew that I wouldn't be at this training school long. I didn't really feel like I fit in. I got along with everyone but I didn't feel like it was the right place for me.
Kevin was the exact opposite. He seemed to fit in perfectly. Unfortunately, that's when he started to change. When we started dating, I told Kevin that I was straight edge. I don't smoke, don't drink, and don't do drugs. Never have, never will. I have seen too much from my family and I don't want to put my body through that mess. I told him that I didn't care if he did, just don't make it habitual or bring it into our relationship. He promised that he wouldn't.
It wasn't long before Kevin was unable to keep that promise. After training on Sunday nights, Kevin would go out drinking with the guys. That didn't bother me at first until one night he tried to sneak in my window at Uncle Jerry's late at night, drunk, and tried to have sex with me. I refused to have sex with him drunk. That was our first real fight that woke up my Uncle Jerry and Aunt Mary. Uncle Jerry threw him out of the house. Then things started escalating.
Kevin became close friends with a wrestler named Lance Thomas. Lance was a good guy but was on steroids and soon got Kevin on it too. I always thought he was in great shape and was already incredibly muscular but Kevin would laugh at me and tell me if I wanted him to go to the WWE, then I would want this for him and be happy. Not long after the steroids started, I caught Kevin and Lance smoking weed in one of the training rooms. Kevin started to pressure me into getting high with them but I would walk away and waited until he was straight minded again to talk to him. I would talk to Tamma back home who would give me advice to stay strong if I wanted to stay with Kevin.
"It's the first time away from home in a completely new environment. I'm sure he's just experimenting. I would just give him time and he'll come around, back to the same old Kevin that you love. Stay strong." She encouraged.
I could feel our once great connection start to slip away the day I saw him popping pills. He told me his back was killing him and needed the pills to help push through his work out. I became angry with him and asked him to stop. He told me that I was overreacting and that everything would be fine.
We had been training in St. Paul for six months when I decided to find a different school. I didn't feel like being at our current school would get us anywhere. I had seen fliers around St. Paul for a local wrestling show called Steel Domain Wrestling. I went to a show one night alone and afterward spoke with the owner and trainer, a wrestler named Ace Steel. Ace told me that there was a training school which was split between his hometown of Chicago and in St. Paul. Training would be held in both Chicago and in St. Paul during the week and he ran the bi-weekly wrestling show in St. Paul. If he was to train me, I would be expected to be at every training and at the shows. I was to do everything he asked of me during training, including helping with the show and with setting up the ring.
I quickly agreed, it sounded like an amazing opportunity for me. This is what I had been looking for. The moment I met Ace, I knew that I was making the right decision in switching schools. He introduced me to the other trainers, Kevin Quinn and Danny Dominion. I told him about Kevin and a little of our story. Ace asked me how big of a factor Kevin played in my desire to train. I gave him a passionate speech about my love for wrestling and even if I didn't have someone at my side supporting me, I would still be standing there, talking to him. Ace smiled and welcomed me to Steel Domain Wrestling. He told me that I could call him Chris but Kevin could only call him Ace. He gave me information as to when training was to start and to get there early to help set up the ring.
One of the things I liked about Chris was that he wasn't going to treat me differently than any of the other boys. I wasn't going to get special treatment for being a girl and that couldn't have made me happier. I wanted to know every aspect of the wrestling business, even sweeping the floors and trucking in the plywood and steel of the ring, which I wasn't getting at our old school. At 5'1, I didn't have much in height. But I worked out regularly, was very toned and in great shape for my size. I wanted to show Kevin and everyone that I could do pretty much anything that they could do, despite my gender and lack of height. And Chris was going to get me there. He said he could tell my passion and heart for wrestling when we met and was going to put it to the test. I told him to bring it on.
Steel Domain Wrestling looked like an old warehouse, much different from the facilities that Kevin and I were use to. Kevin complained about it but I brushed it off. I couldn't wait to get started. As we pulled up, Ace and a few other guys were standing by the ring truck.
"About time you two, come on!" Chris shouted. I shook hands with everyone and made a quick introduction. Kevin held back at the car.
"There will be more time for that later. Let's get the ring inside before it starts to rain. If my boards get wet, it's your fault, Gause." Chris told me.
I merely nodded and grabbed the ends of two boards as he grabbed the other end. We had just gotten the canvas put on the ring when the rain started. Two guys scurried in minutes later, clothes already soaked from the hard rain.
"Sorry about that, you know Chicago traffic." The tall blonde said.
"Doesn't matter now. Get over here and meet our newest trainees." Chris told them both.
"Okay, I'm Kristina Gause.' I began my introductions. "I'm 19 years old from a small town outside of Charleston, SC. Been training for about six months now, haven't had a match yet. Actually I haven't done that much yet." I admitted.
"Very nice, tell us a little more about yourself." One of the guys encouraged.
"I'm probably the coolest, nerdy-ist person you will ever meet. I love comic books, Star Wars, Star Trek, and really into all kinds of video games. I really love all things Disney and have a collection of Beauty and the Beast water globes. I kick box so anything smart you say about my water globes, you'll probably get a kick upside your head. I also am a yoga master, I practice Judo and Jujutsu, and I'm a massage therapist."
"So basically what you are telling me is that you are the perfect woman." Said one of the guys who came in late.
A few of the guys smiled and chuckled as in agreement. I turned my attention to who spoke to me and the moment my eyes met his, it felt like a bolt of lightening just struck me. The hair on my arms stood on end and electricity coursed through my body. I couldn't help but smile.
"I guess if that's your definition then I'm your girl." I replied.
"MY girl." Kevin said, defensively. Then proceeded to make his introductions, letting it be known that he and I were together and he wouldn't stand of anyone to flirt with "his girl". From behind Kevin's back, I looked over at my bolt of lightening and rolled my eyes. He tried not to laugh.
"Okay, introductions are done. Lets get to work." Chris said, pulling me by the arm and into the ring. "Let's see what you can do."
We trained for two hours before Ace blew his whistle. "Hey Gause!" he called me over to him. "You have really great instincts. You've only been doing this for six months?" I nodded. "Do you have referee gear?" He asked. I nodded again.
"In my bag, I like to be prepared." I informed him. Ace's grin got bigger. "Ref for me tonight." It was a statement, not a question.
"Whatever you need me to do, Ace."
"That's the attitude I like. Go get ready and I'll let you know what the card looks like." "Thanks. What's Kevin going to do?" I had to ask.
Ace thought for a moment. "He can tear tickets at the door." He said with a grin.
Kevin isn't going to like that. I thought. I didn't say anything but hopped out of the ring and grabbed my purple gear bag.
"Purple, huh?" a voice said from behind me.
I turned and it was my lightening bolt guy again. He appeared to be the same height of Kevin but skinner, with noticeable tattoos on his hands and forearms, a lip piercing, and long, badly done bleached blonde hair.
"Most of us just have a black bag. But you have purple." He pointed out.
"Well I like being different." I simply stated. He smirked.
"That you are."
"I'm sorry; I didn't catch your name earlier."
"I'm CM Punk."
I smiled. "Okay we can do ring intros later. I asked what your name is."
He smirked again. "I'm Phil Brooks. Everyone calls me Punk though. It doesn't matter what you call me."
"Nice to meet you, Phil."
"Pleasure is all mine, Kristina."
Kevin came up from behind and put his arms around my shoulders.
"Hey, Punk." Kevin said with almost a growl in his voice.
Phil took a step back. "Hello Kevin." And extended his hand.
Kevin shook Phil's hand, eyes all intense.
"Calm down. He was just saying hi." I told Kevin.
Kevin broke his eyes away from Phil.
"How did you get on the show?" Kevin asked.
"Ace said he needed a referee and I have gear."
"Hmph." Kevin grumbled and walked away. I shook my head.
"He didn't use to be like this." I said, apologetically.
"You don't have to justify anything to me." Phil told me.
"I know. I feel like I have to though."
Just then the other guy who came in late jogged over to us. He was slightly shorter than his friend. He was a little thicker too, with short brown hair and a goofy, contagious grin.
"Hi! I'm Scott Colton but everyone calls me Colt. Ace said you are the ref tonight. I'm first match." I couldn't help but grin at Colt.
"Indeed I am. How may I be of assistance to you?"
The night went great. The show was terrific. I reffed all 8 matches and didn't break a sweat. Ace said that I did wonderful and handed me an envelope with a $20 bill.
"It's not much but more than you were expecting." He said.
"No Ace you don't have to. I'm your trainee, remember?"
"But you were great tonight and none of us were expecting you to be. No offense. But it was your first night in front of a live crowd, never been a ref before and just met us a few hours ago. It's just a little something to say thank you. But don't expect this all the time." Ace told me. I thanked him and took the envelope.
"Say, we're going out after we get changed. It's a little hole in the wall place called the Suds Bucket. Ever heard of it?" I nodded. "Would you and Kevin like to go?"
A bar. Just great. Place for me to show that I don't drink in front of guys I just met and for Kevin to get wasted. But it was my first night in the company and I wanted to seem cool. "Sure."
The Suds Bucket was the closest thing to what passed as a country bar in St. Paul. As part of their initiation, the boys made me get on stage and sing karaoke.
"I'm telling you, you don't want me to do this. I'm not that good." I warned but they still cheered me on. I picked "Put Your Heart in to it." by Sherrie Austin. The crowd was really into it and I got to perform and play up the song a bit.
Kevin was really into it to until the line. "You've got my attention, baby." when I sat on Phil's lap for a moment. After the song, the boys demanded another one.
"I think this song can represent us in wrestling a little bit." I explained, introducing my next song choice.
I sang "Mi Vida Loca." by Pam Tillis. Again Kevin glared when I ran my fingers across Phil's long, bleached blonde hair with the line "I see your tattoos."
Instead of talking to me, Kevin ditched me at the bar after the songs. I sat at a table with Phil, Colt, and Ace and peeled the label off of my bottle of water.
"So what's bothering you, kid? Him?" Ace asked, nodding his head towards Kevin.
I let out an exasperated sigh.
"Yeah I guess." I responded.
"So is something bothering you or do you always shred the labels of innocent water bottles?" Ace asked again.
"I was singing and having some fun and it upset him. So instead of telling me he has a problem or talking to me like a mature adult, he opens a bottle of beer." I explained.
"If that's what he wants to do, don't let it ruin your good time. Relax." Colt said.
I had to smile at him.
"You know, you're right. Screw him if he's being an ass." I said.
Kevin turned back around to stare at me for a moment. I knew he couldn't have heard us from the distance. I knew he was checking up on me. I gave him a little wave and smiled politely. As soon as he turned back around, I gave him a middle finger. The guys didn't say anything, merely chuckled. The bartender walked over to the table and presents me with a beer a few minutes later.
"Compliments from the guy at the end of the bar." The bartender explained. I looked over and there was a guy at the end of the bar, smiling at me and waving.
"Can you please tell him no thank you but I appreciate it." I said politely.
The bartender looked confused but walked away. A few minutes later the same guy from the end of the bar walks over.
"Hey pretty lady, that was meant for you." He explained to me. I sighed.
Here we go, in front of my new friends. "I said I appreciate it but no thank you." I once again tried to be polite.
The guy began to look a little irritated. "Come on pretty lady don't be like that. Now have a beer with me."
"I said no." I said sternly.
"What's wrong, little lady? What you think you're better than me? Is my beer not good enough for you?" The guy demanded to know.
Phil and Colt stood up, ready to defend me. I raised my hand at both mens chest, telling them I got this.
"Look dude it's nothing personal against you. I don't drink, I don't smoke, and I don't do drugs. I never have, I never will. I'm straight edge. And if turning down your beer means that, then yes, I am better than you." I said, sitting back down.
Everyone around us began to clap. The guy's mouth was wide open, couldn't believe what he just heard. Slowly he turned to go back to the bar, signaling to order another beer.
"That. Was. Amazing." Ace stammered. I blushed. "I'm not sure where that came from. I'm sorry." I said apologetically.
"Don't apologize! That was great!" Colt said, elatedly. Phil was smirking again.
"What?" I asked him. He shook his head.
"I may have to steal that I'm better than you line." Phil stated.
Colt leaned in and whispered, "He's straight edge too."
Of course he is, I thought. Phil looked at me again and shook his head.
"Perfect woman." Was all he said.
Back at the bar, Kevin was in a drunken stupor and fell off the bar stool.
"Guess that's my cue." I said to the guys, standing up then said my goodbyes.
I walked over to where Kevin fell and attempted to pick him up. Colt was on the opposite side of Kevin, assisting me. I opened my mouth to say something but he shook his head. Once we had Kevin on his feet, I slung Kevin's left arm over my shoulders as Colt grabbed the right arm and we dragged Kevin out of the bar. Colt helped me put an unconscious Kevin in the passenger seat of my car.
"You're going to need help with him. We'll follow." Colt said.
I didn't feel like arguing. This wasn't the first time that I have had to drag Kevin into his apartment while he was out of it and it was never easy. I was grateful that he didn't seem to mind. Colt and Phil walked up to the car at the apartment building.
"I got this. Just unlock the door." Phil said, flanking to my side.
Phil and Colt laid Kevin down on his side in his bed.
"I'm sorry for this, guys. Thanks for the help." I told them.
"Don't worry about it. We take care of our own." Colt said.
"You're one of us now." Phil told me with a wink.
My stomach flip flopped. I had to resist the impulse to bite my lip. Instead, I changed the conversation.
"It's a six hour drive from here to Chicago and it's late. Are ya'll okay to drive?" I asked standing beside our cars.
"Ya'll. You're so Southern it's cute. Yeah we will be okay." Colt told me.
I nodded. Phil slipped something in my hand.
"See you Saturday." He said.
I didn't have to look at the piece of paper to know what it was. I nodded. I gave Colt a hug bye and hesitated slightly before stepping to Phil. I wasn't sure why I hesitated the way I did. Phil pulled his arms around my waist, hugging me tight. I closed my eyes reflexively, breathing him in a little.
"You smell like cherry blossoms." He whispered softly then he looked slightly embarrassed.
"See you Saturday." I told them both, pretending I didn't hear him.
I bolted home and called Tamma.
"It's three o'clock in the morning, Kat. This better be good." Tamma said, groggily. I quickly began spilling the whole story out. There is a long silence to the point I thought she fell asleep.
"Wow." She finally said.
"Right! I'm sorry to call so late but I had to talk to someone and you're my best friend."
"No I understand. What do you think this means?"
"I was hoping you would tell me."
"I have no clue. Be careful, Kat." She told me before we hung up.
I unfolded the piece of paper that had both Phil's and Colt's number. I called Phil first thing Sunday morning after I woke up.
"Is it too early?" I asked, without saying hello.
Phil chuckled. "I was hoping it would be you. No, it's not too early. I don't really sleep much. What's up?"
"I just wanted to thank you and Colt for your help last night. That's not the first impression that Kevin wanted to leave I'm sure."
"I wouldn't worry about Kevin's first impression with us. You're welcome."
We proceeded to talk for three hours on the phone. First, it began with me telling him my story of moving from Charleston with Kevin and then started telling him more of our relationship, how it use to be and how it has changed over the last few months. He started telling me about his family, which he didn't go into a lot of detail.
"I only have one sibling, an older brother. Wayne is six years older than me and we weren't close growing up. We've been better about it now but we use to not talk much. I always wanted a sister. Closest I have is my best friend, Tamma. We've been close since I was a sophomore in high school. What about you?"
There was a long pause before he answered.
"It's complicated." he finally replied.
By the way he spoke, I could tell it wasn't a conversation he wanted to have. I asked Colt about it a little while later and he told me that Phil had a brother, Mike, but the two haven't spoken in a while due to a fight they had. I tried to press Colt for further information but he simply said it was a matter between the two brothers and I dropped it.
We talked about being straight edge. He told me about his dad being an alcoholic and I told him about my dad's brothers and sister all either being on drugs or on alcohol at any given point in the day. We talked about comic books and Star Wars until Kevin beeped in.
A little later on, I called Colt. Once again I thanked him for helping me with Kevin. We proceeded to talk for two hours. He said that I made a great impression on Ace and everyone else and that I would be a great fit with the wrestlers.
"Kevin we're not too sure about. We're giving him a chance because we all like you. But you're our friend now. And his reactions last night are not going to go over well with the rest of us." Colt informed me.
"Again, I'm really sorry about that. He didn't use to be this way."
"Yeah, that's what Punk said too." He told me.
I was silent for a few moments.
"You two really hit it off." Colt said, changing the subject.
"Yeah I think that's what set Kevin off." I said, not really ready to talk about Phil yet with Colt.
"Hey, that guy can't tell you who you can or can't be friends with. I wouldn't worry about him. These things have a way of resolving itself."
I had to smile. Colt was so easy to talk to.
"Kevin called me." Tamma told me one night on the phone, weeks later.
"Oh yeah? About what?" I inquired.
"I think you know about what. Or about whom." She corrected.
"I tried telling him that Phil and I are just friends."
"Just friends that are attracted to each other."
"Did Kevin tell you that?" I asked.
"Kat, I've known you for how long? You can't fool me. Kevin may have mentioned something but he didn't have to. I know you to well."
I sighed. She had me there.
"Walk me through this because I'm not there, I don't know these things. But what is it about this guy?" Tamma asked me.
"It's a lot of little things I guess. And a lot of big things. It's weird, it's like we have nothing in common but we have so much in common. It's in the way he makes me laugh, the way he makes me feel when he's around. He has a way of looking at me that makes me feel like I was just struck by lightning. It makes the hair on my arms stand on end. He's sarcastic. He can be mean. Phil will tell anyone to go fuck off. He doesn't like many people but if you're someone that he likes, he's a great guy. He knows what he wants in life. He's passionate and determined. He doesn't give in to life's pressures. He's real." I explained.
"And Kevin isn't real anymore?" she asked.
"Kevin will put up a front, act the way he thinks people want him to act. It's hard to know who you're talking to at times. Phil is unapologetically Phil. He'll talk to you the same way he would talk to my father. You know what you are getting with him. And yeah, I like that."
"What are you saying about you and Kevin then?" Tamma asked.
"I'm not sure that one particularly has to do with the other. Phil and I are friends. Yes, there is a level of attraction there but we are friends. I love Kevin. And he needs me right now." I told her.
Tamma made what sounded like a snort through her nostrils.
"I know, I know I get it. But trust me, I'm not going to do anything with Phil while I am with Kevin and right now, I want to be with Kevin. He needs me." I reiterated again.
"Kevin's my friend too. I know things haven't been easy between the two of you since you started in Ace's camp. And that's not your fault. He's not the same, KK. The drug usage is getting out of hand."
"It's not to that point yet. I can save him, Tamma."
"And what if he doesn't want to be saved? What if there is no saving him?"
"No I don't believe that. I believe he can be saved."
"Is that why you're still with him?"
"Well, not completely..." I admitted.
"Kat, be careful."
I made quite a few friends in and out of wrestling. Maintaining a friendship with someone who wasn't involved with wrestling when you are so deep involved isn't always the easiest thing to do. Most of the time they don't understand why you do what you do. But I had gotten a job at a day spa in St. Paul and got to be real close with another massage therapist named Darla. I was one of her bridesmaids as she married the love of her life, Daniel. Not long after they got married, they tried having children but had no luck. Darla found out that she had what the doctor's called "a hostile uterus" that it would be incredibly difficult to get pregnant but it was possible. But the doctor warned that she may not be able to carry to full term, even if she was to get pregnant. They decided to harvest her eggs so that they could have a baby of their own and get someone to carry it for her. She cried in my arms as she began telling me what she would have to go through to harvest the eggs. I told her no matter where I was in life, if she needed someone to carry her child that I would.
Working at the day spa was fantastic. I got to set my own hours so it didn't interfere with wrestling. I was doing what I loved and got medical benefits. As soon as I was cleared by my doctor, I had corrective eye surgery. Kevin was supposed to pick me up after my surgery but to my surprise, Phil was the one in the waiting room.
"Your Uncle Jerry called me. Kevin couldn't make it and no one else in your household would get off work in time." Phil informed me.
I was too out of it to ask how Uncle Jerry knew to call him or to ask if he drove from Chicago just to pick me up from the doctor's office. Phil helped me to bed and I slept for 15 hours. I groaned, gently rubbing my face and opening my eyes. To my surprise, there was a pair of brown eyes staring at me from the foot of my bed.
"Good afternoon, beautiful." Phil greeted.
"You stayed?" I asked Phil. He shrugged then smiled.
It was like I was seeing him for the first time. His goatee was coming in well, framing his jaw line and mouth. When he smiled, the corner of his mouth where he had his lip piercing twitched a little. His brown eyes were soft and gentle, almost dancing as he looked into mine. My stomach seemed to dance in rhythm. I could feel the electricity I had described to Tamma coursing through my veins.
"I figured you may need someone when you woke up. Are you okay?"
"I think so. It's weird. Good weird but it's weird. I'm adjusting." I informed him.
Phil told me that he had exchanged numbers with Uncle Jerry one night when he had stopped over on the way to training. He had been in town helping Chris promote the next SDW show when Uncle Jerry had called him. Apparently Kevin had gotten drunk wasn't able to get me. When I was starting to come out of the surgery and no one was in the waiting room for me, the nurse called Uncle Jerry, who was the emergency contact number. He then called Phil.
Phil had just finished explaining when Kevin burst into my room. Phil jumped up from the bed instantly.
"Baby, I'm so sorry." Kevin rushed over to me, ignoring Phil. He put his hands on my face and kissed me.
"Did everything go okay?" he asked.
I nodded. "It went very well. I can see!" I told him, excitedly.
Kevin hugged me tightly to him. My eyes met Phil who merely nodded once then quietly left my room.
Phil and I would talk on the phone every night for hours at a time. We would get in these intense deep conversations about life, wrestling, what we were both passionate about. Afterward, I would call Colt or Tamma. Colt quickly became my best friend. There was something more in Phil's and my friendship, no matter how much we tried to ignore it. It was unspoken between us and our friends. Kevin became jealous. I would tell Kevin that there wasn't anything going on, which was the truth. But the energy and the connection between Phil and me couldn't be denied, it was too palpable. I knew I was falling for Phil but I tried to ignore it due to wanting to make things work with Kevin. It didn't help that I was being referred to as "Punk's girl" amongst the boys.
